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Seattle is pretty well known for attracting introverted/shy people. It has a social phenomenon known as the "Seattle freeze" where people from elsewhere who try to socialize as they did elsewhere hit a wall and have difficulty finding a circle of friends. I hit that wall hard when I moved there and that's the main reason I left.
Most of the people I know who live there and are more introverted and less social tend to enjoy it there.
Seattle for the most part, has a younger and tech savvy population. That is very noticeable in that Metro. Granted there are mixed age groups, but Seattle seems primarily millenials. That in itself has to have a lot to do, with the Seattle Freeze reputation.
When psychologists discuss introversion/extroversion, they mean something a little different from whether someone is shy or not. Basically, it's about whether you prefer to spend time alone or with other people. Obviously if you're from a rural Midwestern area you're not going to speak to many strangers over the course of the day, but you're less likely to be the kind of person who just prefers to keep to themselves reading a book or something versus going out to a social event.
I presume that the large number of transplants from the Northeast has made Virginia, and to a lesser extent North Carolina, more introverted than the rest of the south. By my standards both regions of the country seem very outgoing though, insofar as complete strangers come up to you and initiate conversation. It's never stopped seeming weird to me.
I live in the Charlotte area (and am a native) and there's rarely a time I don't strike up a conversation, a nod "hello", holding open a door, etc. when I'm out and about at the grocery store, post office, park, etc. Clearly, you respect a person's personal space and ques, do they seem receptive. The area is still friendly, most natives and newbies alike
Seattle for the most part, has a younger and tech savvy population. That is very noticeable in that Metro. Granted there are mixed age groups, but Seattle seems primarily millenials. That in itself has to have a lot to do, with the Seattle Freeze reputation.
That goes back a long time though, iirc people started talking about it in the 90's, and I lived there about ten years ago. I think that the presence of the tech industry certainly has a lot to do with it, though.
That goes back a long time though, iirc people started talking about it in the 90's, and I lived there about ten years ago. I think that the presence of the tech industry certainly has a lot to do with it, though.
When Seattle was a city comprised almost entirely of Boeing and maritime workers (which it was for many decades), it was not an introverted place at all. Once the software/techie scene got big in the mid-late 90's things started to change. Boeing is still the largest single employer in the state but the number of tech jobs now greatly outweighs the number of Boeing workers.
A large tech scene will definitely create introversion. As I've mentioned previously, I think Silicon Valley is the most introverted place in the country. People barely look at or talk to each other. The Seattle Freeze is a more exaggerated version of Minnesota Nice, from my experience, where people are polite and "friendly" at a superficial level, but generally stick to those they already know. Silicon Valley isn't polite, friendly, rude, direct, indirect or any of that. The defining characteristic of people there is that they don't engage and keep to themselves. Just to clarify, I'm talking specifically about the South Bay and the Peninsula (the East Bay, SF, and the North Bay are different).
Last edited by Vincent_Adultman; 03-01-2019 at 12:44 PM..
I live in Seattle and it is a good place if you want to be left alone. Lots of introverts. Maybe it's the tech people (although there are plenty of extroverts who show up to make money off Amazon in sales, management, etc) but I think it's the dreary weather.
I think it really depends on your budget.
How much do ya got.
If you don’t have much it will still cost you but it’s a give and take thing.
I think that if you live in the rural type areas with houses sort of next to each other meaning if they can see you unloading your groceries and such or know when you are home or what hours you keep they will know most of what you do.
Oh boy these folks will tell everyone your business.
I went through that when I was less well off.
On the other hand if you can afford it and can get a house that can’t be viewed from the street you will have a bit more privacy.
I bought a private spot on the Olympic Penninsula to have this.
You can’t even see my house from the road.
If I was a weirdo I could walk around butt naked.
I however am not into that but I am a somewhat shy person and deeply value my privacy.
Bottom line is if you can afford privacy it will keep door knockers and nosey a$$ neighbors away.
Living where people can see your every move and talk about it doesn’t seem to me like a good fit for shy person.
YMMV.
Andy.
There's different cultural expectations put on people.
In the Northeast, there's a concept called "proper reserve." Basically it's considered to be intrusive if you approach a stranger and speak without being spoken to first, or without some sort of pressing need (e.g., cashier at a store).
In the South in contrast, it's generally considered rude not to engage in idle, surface-level chitchat with people - particularly if you're next to them for a good period of time (waiting in line, on the bus, etc).
This is so true. I grew up in the NE. We never inquired into people's lives or sensitive subjects. We kept our true natures and details to ourselves and those we trusted. In the South, people will tell you their life story, even those who move there, not natives, will do that. It's an interesting phenomenon.
You can be shy and reserved but not lonely. There’s a ton of people and action. Plenty for you to do and be apart of. But you never have to talk to anyone. Walk greenways, to the grocery store. Do your thing. There are other shy people.
If you picked a smaller city or town or a suburb or a city, it’d be like wanting to be lonely versus just wanting a place to be comfortable and shy
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