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Old 03-22-2015, 04:57 PM
 
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If two people who know they don't want children meet and hit it off romantically, is it worth it to still get married? Or does it make more sense to just be together, and even cohabitate indefinitely, without making it official?

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Last edited by Oldhag1; 03-23-2015 at 12:26 AM..
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Old 03-22-2015, 05:15 PM
 
Location: McKinleyville, California
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kiplingif View Post
If two people who know they don't want children meet and hit it off romantically, is it worth it to still get married? Or does it make more sense to just be together, and even cohabitate indefinitely, without making it official?
Making it official, as in a marriage license gives a couple benefits, rights and privilgegs that cannot be got any other way, same with tax protections and a spouse not having to testify against her/his spouse. Cohabiting is just that, cohabiting. By the way, none of those 1049 federal rights that come with a marriage license have anything to do with children, the laws and rights governing children do not take getting marriied either, they still apply to a single couple that has children together.
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Old 03-22-2015, 05:50 PM
 
Location: McKinleyville, California
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kiplingif View Post
I guess I should have had a bit longer of an opening post. I figured it wasn't much of a great debate that most would argue people who have kids together and love each other are best off married.
Why? How does getting married make it better off if they have kids? It does not guarantee that they will stay married, obviously by todays divorce rates of over 55% for first marriages. I think the biggest problem is couples having kids when they should just get a dog or cat.
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Old 03-22-2015, 05:59 PM
 
294 posts, read 372,599 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDragonslayer View Post
Why? How does getting married make it better off if they have kids? It does not guarantee that they will stay married, obviously by todays divorce rates of over 55% for first marriages. I think the biggest problem is couples having kids when they should just get a dog or cat.
Where on earth did you get the 55% divorce number? The whole "half of marriages end in divorce" thing is a myth unless you look at specific subsets of the population.

And decades of sociological research shows that children raised in a two-parent household do better in just about every way than those with just one. But, I digress to get back to the main point of the OP.
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Old 03-22-2015, 06:48 PM
 
Location: McKinleyville, California
6,414 posts, read 10,499,214 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kiplingif View Post
Where on earth did you get the 55% divorce number? The whole "half of marriages end in divorce" thing is a myth unless you look at specific subsets of the population.

And decades of sociological research shows that children raised in a two-parent household do better in just about every way than those with just one. But, I digress to get back to the main point of the OP.
And how does marriage assure parents stay together? You are right, the divorce rate has dropped, but so has the marriage rate along with it as more people choose to marry later in life or not even marry. Again, getting married now is more about the protections that are granted with a marriage license, it does not take marriage to have kids and many couples are not having kids. Marriage is not what it used to be, where one was expected to find a life partner, get engaged, marry then have kids and then stay married, now people have kids and do not get married, the stigma on single parents is not what it used to be, many people do not frown on it anymore. But still 40% to 50% of first marriages end in divorce with a higher rate for subsequent marriages.
http://www.apa.org/topics/divorce/
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Old 03-22-2015, 07:27 PM
 
5,888 posts, read 3,230,302 times
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I don't think civil marriage is important or necessary, except to the extent that the government has used this license to create a system of legal discrimination and favoritism.

It is clear to me that there is no longer any State interest in marriage (and thus it has no business/authority to regulate or license it, or even take any notice of it).

If it was to insure that husbands would support their wives and fathers would support their children, thats moot now that there are laws on the books to compel child support and an extensive welfare state has arisen that steps in to be a surrogate husband/father.

I am baffled by the public support for this archaic and discriminatory institution. It should be abolished.
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Old 03-22-2015, 07:41 PM
 
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Legally/financially it is definitely better off to be married than not if you are living with someone. There are numerous advantages and protections should things fall apart that do not exist if you just cohabitate.
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Old 03-22-2015, 07:45 PM
 
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You have to define marriage. Is it a piece of paper or a relationship that is centered on commitment? Meeting someone in Vegas and getting married 3 days later is not equal to two people living together in a committed relationship for 10+ years but without a piece of paper saying they are married. Too many people are more worried about the piece of paper and the big wedding rather than the relationship.

You can still protect each other, and any children, without being married. Wills and estate planning can take care of those issues. Yes taxes will remain different, but in a lot of cases those are better not being married.
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Old 03-23-2015, 12:07 AM
 
Location: Dallas area, Texas
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Get married.

If you are incapacitated, do you want your parents/siblings making decisions for you or your partner? If you die, do you want your parents to inherit your things/money/property or your partner?

Yes, you can set up power of attorney and wills and lots of other legal documents. But, if you need all of those legal documents to give your partner any say so, then why not go ahead and get married.
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Old 03-23-2015, 12:12 AM
 
Location: My beloved Bluegrass
20,127 posts, read 16,179,285 times
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1. Please stay on topic: Is it worth getting married if you don't want kids. Great Debates has narrow parameters for what is and isn't on topic. Some related topics can be pointed out but the focus of your post must be the actual topic.

2. While some BRIEF anecdotal evidence (also known as personal stories) is allowed, it must be limited to short blurbs that support a point up for debate. Any posts that are solely personal stories belong in another forum and will be deleted in this thread.

3. Just a reminder: This is a debate forum, generally 1-2 sentence statements are not allowed.

ETA: All future posts that bring up same sex marriage will be deleted, regardless of what else they say. That is NOT the topic and will create an almost guaranteed result of thread hijacking.

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Last edited by Oldhag1; 03-23-2015 at 10:42 AM..
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