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I was reading an online article about a new parenting method, raising children in a gender free environment. The parents that practice this method do not think it's necessary to define their children to others by gender and society's ideals of gender. The naysayers beleive the parents are doing more harm then good because they say gender greatly impacts a person's self image, interpersonal relationships, and even their sexuality (according to some). The supporters of this particular method hail the parents as revolutionizing parenting skills and say they are raising more stable children because they will not be bond by the "rules" of their gender.
Examples of a 'gender free child':
- Pregnancy announcement, nursery decor, parties, do not include any reference to the child's gender.
- Child is given a unisex name like Dakota, Reese, Parker, Alex.
- A daughter is not discouraged from trying out for the H.S. football team; a son is not reprimanded for playing in mother's make up.
- Child is referred to by their given name as opposed to "he" or "she."
- Child is taught that they are 'gender free' and to explain this ideology to classmates if they are asked about being "a boy or a girl."
What do you make of all of this?
Can a child be successfully raised in a gender free environment or not?
I was reading an online article about a new parenting method, raising children in a gender free environment. The parents that practice this method do not think it's necessary to define their children to others by gender and society's ideals of gender. The naysayers beleive the parents are doing more harm then good because they say gender greatly impacts a person's self image, interpersonal relationships, and even their sexuality (according to some). The supporters of this particular method hail the parents as revolutionizing parenting skills and say they are raising more stable children because they will not be bond by the "rules" of their gender.
Examples of a 'gender free child':
- Pregnancy announcement, nursery decor, parties, do not include any reference to the child's gender.
- Child is given a unisex name like Dakota, Reese, Parker, Alex.
- A daughter is not discouraged from trying out for the H.S. football team; a son is not reprimanded for playing in mother's make up.
- Child is referred to by their given name as opposed to "he" or "she."
- Child is taught that they are 'gender free' and to explain this ideology to classmates if they are asked about being "a boy or a girl."
What do you make of all of this?
Can a child be successfully raised in a gender free environment or not?
Stuff like this is silly. Boys and girls have genders. Period. You cannot raise them to be gender-free. The key is to simply not be derogatory toward either gender.
And who are we kidding, really? Can teenage girls really play football at the same physical level as teenage boys? No. It's not that their value is different because of it, but let's admit that girls are not physiologically the same as boys.
Stuff like this is silly. Boys and girls have genders. Period. You cannot raise them to be gender-free. The key is to simply not be derogatory toward either gender.
And who are we kidding, really? Can teenage girls really play football at the same physical level as teenage boys? No. It's not that their value is different because of it, but let's admit that girls are not physiologically the same as boys.
I knew a girl in high school -- one of the skinniest girls you'd see -- competing in boy's wrestling because there wasn't a female team. And apparently she could actually hold herself pretty well.
There's also powder puff football for the ladies with the guys as cheerleaders.
Gender is determined by society. If we deem gender to be less important and aim for a gender-free environment, so be it. I wouldn't encourage the child to talk about being gender-free, or call a child by their name instead of he or she, but not be so worried about gender roles. It's okay for a girl to like XYZ and a boy to like ABC. (edit: AKA Let them be who they want to be!)
I was reading an online article about a new parenting method, raising children in a gender free environment. The parents that practice this method do not think it's necessary to define their children to others by gender and society's ideals of gender. The naysayers beleive the parents are doing more harm then good because they say gender greatly impacts a person's self image, interpersonal relationships, and even their sexuality (according to some). The supporters of this particular method hail the parents as revolutionizing parenting skills and say they are raising more stable children because they will not be bond by the "rules" of their gender.
Examples of a 'gender free child':
- Pregnancy announcement, nursery decor, parties, do not include any reference to the child's gender.
- Child is given a unisex name like Dakota, Reese, Parker, Alex.
- A daughter is not discouraged from trying out for the H.S. football team; a son is not reprimanded for playing in mother's make up.
- Child is referred to by their given name as opposed to "he" or "she."
- Child is taught that they are 'gender free' and to explain this ideology to classmates if they are asked about being "a boy or a girl." What do you make of all of this? Can a child be successfully raised in a gender free environment or not?
I am a firm believer in not telling someone how to raise a child and probably would back out of this one too, however, parents who do this can be setting their kids up for bullying in school and more. What ever happened to celebrating the birth of your child boy or girl and let everyone know what you have given birth to. What are you suppose to say when someone asks "GUESS"..?? The Unisex name thing..not so bad, the not discouraging daughter from playing football..not so bad as she probably would end up being a kicker anyhow. The Gender Free thing bothers me. Why confuse the kid?? We wonder why are kids may end up gay or wonder why in the very least they have female tendencies if they are a boy or male tendencies if they are girls..I would say this would be the parents fault.
Good Lord..have your babies, let everyone know what gender they are, give them a good strong name that suits them for who they are and as they grow support them no matter what gender they are or who they become. Its called LOVE.
Last edited by TheViking85; 04-17-2012 at 10:45 AM..
Reason: Refrain from using colored fonts in the Great Debates forum.
There are distinct differences between male and female which do help in shaping who they are and you really can't ignore those differences. So, trying to stay gender neutral and not say whether it is Jeff and Jennifer that is pregnant................ The definition of gender according to Webster is "that of being male or female human being esp. as it effects a person's self image, social relationships, etc." and that still is going to make it difficult to ignore whether someone is male or female. Isn't that what gender neutral does, try to pretend the child is neither male nor female? Now, the opportunities, styles of clothing, etc. are so open that the differences between male and female are not as great as they were 50 or 100 years ago so I don't see an argument for removing barriers by making children gender neutral. Since children generally model after the parents, it would take a few generations of concentrating on this for it to stick. Experimenting with the futures of your children with something could really mess them up? I would just leave it up to nature.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stan4
I am ok with the sports and make-up thing...
The rest...whatever.
I think going overboard one way or another is a little silly.
I'm with you. But it's also because I don't see makeup or playing football as biologically part of sex. They are socially constructed aspects of gender, there is a difference here. On the other hand, the whole unisex name, no reference to gender: gender denial is not the same as gender denial. While actually I don't see the point of having gendered names in the first place, they are here to stay, and purposely giving a kid gender neutral names (btw never heard of a boy named 'Dakota', 'Alex' is short for Alexander or Alexandra etc) seems a bit odd.
In the end, though, I don't see it as totally important to 'stream' kid's into their gender but dressing 3 year old girls in dresses, only buying them girl's toys before they are old enough to express their preferences. We STILL live in a very gender-conscious society, and I wish we weren't so, but this seems a little radical at this stage.
Can children be raised successfully in a gender free environment?...I think not...unless you lived on a secluded, never visited island some where....The parents may not identify the gender of their child when they interact with them...but the rest of society will...The child would just learn elswhere (real quick)...I think that to pretend that there is such a thing as "gender free" is stupid...we all have a gender....but if what you mean is that we should not discriminate between our boys and girls by allowing one to explore what he/she likes to play with, or what colors they like, or what sports they'll play...or what clothes they should wear,...or later what jobs they might want...then yes..
Do you think wild animals have male/female roles because of their upbringing?
You can eliminate some of the unnecessary biases that society has towards one sex or the others, but you can't (and I'd argue it would be harmful) to fight nature's natural roles.
Males and female human beings are wired differently. Period. Can't fight it or pretend it just stops and starts at physical differences.
What a ridiculous notion. Biology determines gender and females are different from males. I would find it depressing to be referred to as a 'neutral' as I LOVE being a girl. Women cannot hope to compete with men in most sports anymore than men can have babies. We each have our strengths and weaknesses and it's no reflection on our worth.
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