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I often wonder if we are asking for more than we can handle when we demand that our loved ones do MORE--show us more signs, appear more in dreams, and to be a bigger presence in our journey to find hope.
My mother died one month ago. It has never occured to for her to show me a sign or be a presence in my life since she has passed away. I don't believe in an afterlife and neither did she. I surely do envy those who believe they will one day be reunited with a departed loved one or that they will see evidence of their spirit. That provides them infinite comfort, I'm sure. My mother will always be in a presence in my life through the many thousands of dear memories I have of her.
The day after she died I saw a rainbow in the sky (when rainbows are very rare where I live), and a door shut in my house without explanation. I didn't think, "Wow, those are signs of mom!" I merely thought the obvious, "it's just a coincidence."
My husband died 7 months ago tomorrow. I believe in life after death but it never occured to me either to try and contact his spirit or ask him to show me any signs. I believe in the RIP, REST in Peace. Whether you can disturb spirit or not, IDK but if a person can, I choose not to. Hubby let me know how much he loved me while he was still living and for me to find after he was dead as a "message"...
As some of you may know, hubby and I lived in seperate houses because of circumstances and a couple of months ago I was cleaning out a spare room and came across a jigsaw puzzle that he had put together and mounted on a stiff backing of cardboard. It had been hidden amongst "stuff". It was a jigsaw of a Severe Macaw. He knew how much I love parrots and although that's not the type of parrot I have, it was a message to me that he had always been thinking of me and that he loved me even though at times it seemed like he did not. That was all the messages I needed "from beyond".
Location: West of the Catalinas East of the Tortolitas
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It's been 34 months since I lost my husband. I dream about him frequently, and have had lots of conversations with him in those dreams. As much as I'd love to believe he's still with me, communicating with me, I just don't know. I have heard him a couple of times say something to me and it sounds like he's right next to me. Really startles me. My son and I were watching TV one night and he turned white and said, "Dad's here". He said he felt someone pass by him and smelled my husband's aftershave. It's hard to say if it's wishful thinking, or if he is trying to communicate somehow. I had experiences like that in the first couple of weeks after my parents died, too, and a couple with my grandfather almost ten years after he'd passed away, so I don't know. These experiences with my husband have continued fairly regularly, and I've written them all down over the years.
I do believe we pass to a different dimension when we die, that we do continue to exist in some form, so I suppose communication is possible. But, I also believe that if our loved ones communicate with us, it's to let us know we're not alone, or to guide us if we feel lost without them. It's possible that as much as we think of and miss them, they miss us, too. Probably wishful thinking, but it's comforting to me anyway.
My mother died one month ago. It has never occured to for her to show me a sign or be a presence in my life since she has passed away. I don't believe in an afterlife and neither did she. I surely do envy those who believe they will one day be reunited with a departed loved one or that they will see evidence of their spirit. That provides them infinite comfort, I'm sure. My mother will always be in a presence in my life through the many thousands of dear memories I have of her.
The day after she died I saw a rainbow in the sky (when rainbows are very rare where I live), and a door shut in my house without explanation. I didn't think, "Wow, those are signs of mom!" I merely thought the obvious, "it's just a coincidence."
Just a thought-if you are envious of those of us who believe in the afterlife, is there a specific reason you too can't research the possibility and become a believer also?
My mother died one month ago. It has never occured to for her to show me a sign or be a presence in my life since she has passed away. I don't believe in an afterlife and neither did she. I surely do envy those who believe they will one day be reunited with a departed loved one or that they will see evidence of their spirit. That provides them infinite comfort, I'm sure. My mother will always be in a presence in my life through the many thousands of dear memories I have of her.
The day after she died I saw a rainbow in the sky (when rainbows are very rare where I live), and a door shut in my house without explanation. I didn't think, "Wow, those are signs of mom!" I merely thought the obvious, "it's just a coincidence."
I don't believe in coincidences. I believe in miracles and the more coincidences you start to pay attention to the more miracles you will see. That was surely your mom--I think you feel that it's true but you're afraid to believe it. (I mean this in the nicest way possible.) And maybe the reason you're afraid to believe it is b/c you were so close to your mom who didn't believe in an afterlife and you're afraid that you will be untrue to her memory if you believe it's her and yet it's her giving the signs. Oh my, what a conundrum.
Alas, I don't believe in miracles and I'm not going to suddenly believe in an afterlife because it would comfort me to do so. I wish I could do this! I'm not afraid to believe, I just don't believe; there's a vast difference. It has nothing to do with being "untrue to her memory," it's just my belief system. I wish I had faith as others do, it must be a great comfort in times of grief.
People either are believers or non-believers (or fit somewhere in between). It's not my business to convert them or give it much thought. I believe when a person dies it's exactly as it was before you were born: nothing. If others believe in heaven or hell or reincarnation, that's their right. It's none of my business to question their beliefs nor it ever occur to me to do so.
Alas, I don't believe in miracles and I'm not going to suddenly believe in an afterlife because it would comfort me to do so. I wish I could do this! I'm not afraid to believe, I just don't believe; there's a vast difference. It has nothing to do with being "untrue to her memory," it's just my belief system. I wish I had faith as others do, it must be a great comfort in times of grief.
People either are believers or non-believers (or fit somewhere in between). It's not my business to convert them or give it much thought. I believe when a person dies it's exactly as it was before you were born: nothing. If others believe in heaven or hell or reincarnation, that's their right. It's none of my business to question their beliefs nor it ever occur to me to do so.
Had to rep you on this, Ulysses. I totally like the way you handle yourself.
I don't think we should "expect" anything from our "departed loved ones", but I do believe their spirits come and go to give us comfort. Actually, I know that they do. Can you summon them? I don't think so. Can they give you the winning lottery number? Probably not if they had the same luck in life as my "departed loved ones". I have no idea what it would feel like to feel "alone" because I believe I have been surrounded by their spirits for so long and the presence grows in my hour of need. I think as time passes though that they fade away as time goes on but can still rally in your hour of need. It is not healthy to become obsessed by those that have passed to the point that you are just breathing and no longer living and that happens.
I don't "expect" anything from my late husband, although I'd be awfully appreciative if he'd wake me up if the house is on fire in the middle of the night.
But if he wants to hang around, he's certainly welcome. I'm not going to have a seance or skulk around the house calling "Where are you?"
I do talk to him a lot, though! I like to think he can hear me.
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) And maybe the reason you're afraid to believe it is b/c you were so close to your mom who didn't believe in an afterlife and you're afraid that you will be untrue to her memory if you believe it's her and yet it's her giving the signs. Oh my, what a conundrum.
