Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Almost 2 years ago my longtime companion , fiance and the love of my life for a decade died suddenly at his moms house . I am having terrible trouble learning to live with this ( I will never get over it )
We were 53 and 55 at the time so we were not kids and had been married before . He was a very sensitive man and his mom absolutely did not want him to leave her or her home for any reason and was a major stumbling block in our relationship .
Nevertheless we stayed together . He kept our relationship as far away from her as he could to avoid conflict . I never lacked attention or love from this man but I know the stress was bad .
He called me twice late on a Sunday late , a few hours before he died and first left me a message to please pick up that he was sick . I was already asleep but the first call woke me and when I heard the voice mail , then I spoke to him and he was really afraid . He asked if I really loved him and how much he loved me and that he was really thinking of going to the ER and if he did would I wait up . He made me promise I would wait up so he could call or text me
We lived several hundred miles apart and he also said that he was done with this and he was leaving that next week to finally go with me , he'd made me wait long enough , I told him do not worry about that just go get checked out .
The last thing we said was I love you one last time and he hung up and I never heard from him again .
His mom found him about 18 hours later in his locked room .
Had his sister not intervened I would have just heard nothing again period .
I do not know what happened to him . At all .
It really just tears at me what happened to him . He had not been sick , his mom told me it was none of my business and will also not let his sister have a copy of the autopsy report , which has caused the final rift with them
I've thought about hiring a PI to find out but do not know if that is actually possible . I dont care what it is I just need to know . I was the last person he spoke with .
I have experienced ALOT of death in this life but I am just gutted and am not sure what I can do . If anything .
Almost 2 years ago my longtime companion , fiance and the love of my life for a decade died suddenly at his moms house . I am having terrible trouble learning to live with this ( I will never get over it )
We were 53 and 55 at the time so we were not kids and had been married before . He was a very sensitive man and his mom absolutely did not want him to leave her or her home for any reason and was a major stumbling block in our relationship .
Nevertheless we stayed together . He kept our relationship as far away from her as he could to avoid conflict . I never lacked attention or love from this man but I know the stress was bad .
He called me twice late on a Sunday late , a few hours before he died and first left me a message to please pick up that he was sick . I was already asleep but the first call woke me and when I heard the voice mail , then I spoke to him and he was really afraid . He asked if I really loved him and how much he loved me and that he was really thinking of going to the ER and if he did would I wait up . He made me promise I would wait up so he could call or text me
We lived several hundred miles apart and he also said that he was done with this and he was leaving that next week to finally go with me , he'd made me wait long enough , I told him do not worry about that just go get checked out .
The last thing we said was I love you one last time and he hung up and I never heard from him again .
His mom found him about 18 hours later in his locked room .
Had his sister not intervened I would have just heard nothing again period .
I do not know what happened to him . At all .
It really just tears at me what happened to him . He had not been sick , his mom told me it was none of my business and will also not let his sister have a copy of the autopsy report , which has caused the final rift with them
I've thought about hiring a PI to find out but do not know if that is actually possible . I dont care what it is I just need to know . I was the last person he spoke with .
I have experienced ALOT of death in this life but I am just gutted and am not sure what I can do . If anything .
There's enough circumstances to warrant a police investigation for possible homicide.
did you have any insurance policies or joint accounts that would require you to obtain a death certificate? That would give you the cause of death, maybe. I'm sorry you are going through this.
There's enough circumstances to warrant a police investigation for possible homicide.
Alot of my friends that knew us tell me this .^^^
It was Sonoma County , Ca .. I looked on the website and I think we would have to be legally married . This has been really tough . We didn't have anything joint that I can think of.
Death certificates are public records. Order a copy.
I'd start with this, myself. Unfortunately, unless you had some kind of POA with your friend, the coroner may not release additional information to you due to privacy laws, sometimes death certificates are fairly vague on details (it may simply say, "complications due to kidney failure" or similar). I would wonder if he had you named on a life insurance policy or set up some kind of joint account in your name. Not that the money would mean much to you in your grief, but in time, I'm sure you'd appreciate that he was looking out for you. If you were not close (or at odds) with his family, they may not be forthcoming. If he didn't, it may be that like most people, he "put it off", most people don't want to plan for their own end.
This is very similar to a good friend I had at work almost a decade ago, except that he and his long-term girlfriend (of maybe twenty-five or thirty years!) lived together in his condo. He called in sick to work one day, and had a heart attack while sitting in his recliner at home, it hit us hard, not having the ability to say goodbye to him beforehand. I hope he had the foresight to take care of her.
I wouldn't think there are many "natural causes" that will kill you in your own home, without being hospitalized first, except maybe a heart attack or stroke. Was he under treatment for diabetes, kidney failure, or other serious, debilitating disease?
Contact your attorney. They can often access information that private citizens can't. They can also advise you about possible legal action if they suspect foul play, and will find any insurance policies or joint accounts that existed.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
