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I’ve been looking for my house online, and I have seen a few homes over FaceTime with a great real estate agent. Because I’m moving cross country, and other circumstances… I feel I have to do it this way.
So I found a place that I really like, and I just told the real estate agent I want to put an offer in.
The texts started flying, and I fell apart — like a cheap suit. And I got angry at him again. I should not have to do this alone.
But it’s OK, and I’m OK, and my real estate agent said it’s the first of the freak outs until the house is closed. It is something that I need to do, and because I’m closing the door on the house and the life that I lived for 34 years and had a wonderful life in with my husband. Makes perfect sense that I’m having feelings of sadness and anger. A lot of people have issues with anger and grief, but it’s there. People might feel that anger is inappropriate in grief. It doesn’t always happen, I didn’t feel it with my father’s death, I felt it with my mother a little and I felt it with my husband a lot.
My massage therapist is very pagan/Wiccan woo and one of her favorite sayings is “the universe is telling me…”
I don’t necessarily think that she’s wrong about that, and I have been getting very clear indications that it really is time for me to move on. This isn’t a bad thing, it just is. And I am realizing the emotions that come with it.
And I really want to. I have always wanted to move back to where I came from. It’s just it’s hard to do in a pandemic, and it’s hard to do when you’re older. I don’t want anybody to think that this is not something that I want to do and I don’t want anybody to think that it’s not hard. Because it is. Who knew a piece of paper would make me so emotional?
Two years, seven months and one day… Still grieving, still crying.
Without going into my situation, I can tell you I understand your feelings, I feel your pain and anger. I tell myself "moving forward"......but yes, I have been where you are. You are not alone.
I think it’s probably very hard to leave the house where you lived with your husband. It probably feels like a tie is being broken. But he will always live on in your heart. Hugs).
Thanks, guys. This whole day has been a bit of a wreck. A happy wreck! My niece and my nephew and their families are thrilled that I’m coming home. So is my sister, but she has to be a little judgey about it. And tell me all the things wrong about where I’m moving to. When she doesn’t know where I’m moving to.
Girl. THIS IS SO EXCITING!!! I know you will make the right decisions. But it will be hard. I mean, it will be. It will be very hard to sell that house and move and set up your own place - but you can do it. And I am betting that you will be happier there eventually.
You know, I sold the house my husband and I lived in, and moved, and I also had to sell a lot of HIS items and items that we had bought together for a much larger house. It was emotionally trying. It was tough. It was just very difficult, emotionally and physically. But you know what made it worth while? When I got in from the holidays and instead of being greeted by feelings of "ghosts" and old memories and all that, I walked into my own house, that's decorated the way I want it to be decorated, with only things that I want where I want them, and I felt so good about coming home. I mean, I FELT GOOD and that may have been the first time in a long, long time that I felt good about coming home.
Oh one more thing - I bet your husband understands totally and is rooting for you. That's my belief anyway.
Girl. THIS IS SO EXCITING!!! I know you will make the right decisions. But it will be hard. I mean, it will be. It will be very hard to sell that house and move and set up your own place - but you can do it. And I am betting that you will be happier there eventually.
You know, I sold the house my husband and I lived in, and moved, and I also had to sell a lot of HIS items and items that we had bought together for a much larger house. It was emotionally trying. It was tough. It was just very difficult, emotionally and physically. But you know what made it worth while? When I got in from the holidays and instead of being greeted by feelings of "ghosts" and old memories and all that, I walked into my own house, that's decorated the way I want it to be decorated, with only things that I want where I want them, and I felt so good about coming home. I mean, I FELT GOOD and that may have been the first time in a long, long time that I felt good about coming home.
Oh one more thing - I bet your husband understands totally and is rooting for you. That's my belief anyway.
Please, please, please keep us posted.
Thanks, I should be hearing soon what’s going on. It is scary. But exciting.
When you get home, you'll know you did the right thing. Your grieving sounds normal, which is not to minimize it, but to say that like the things/people/life you're leaving behind, it will always be a part of you and effect you in many ways at any time.
When you get home, you'll know you did the right thing. Your grieving sounds normal, which is not to minimize it, but to say that like the things/people/life you're leaving behind, it will always be a part of you and effect you in many ways at any time.
This this this this this!
I think we take all our lives with us, including those loved ones that have gone on before us. I think the key to grieving in a healthy way is to accept all our feelings, allow them, and allow the memories of these people a place in our lives, without being afraid to accept and experience those feelings.
Everything that happens to us leaves an imprint on our lives in my opinion, so of course loving a person leaves a huge imprint and I think it can always make us a better person.
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Solly says — Be nice!
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