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Well, my back is really acting up today, along with the balance issues. DS still thinks what he did was ok, just a harmless prank. He buttered the floor in the bathrooom and kitchen because he wanted his sister to fall. Well, I was the one who fell instead. He still doesn't think there's a problem, he says I've never raised a teenager, so I don't know what a teen prank is. Hey, I'm not taking this crap!
I have a right to move about in my own home without constantly watching for "pranks". He still thinks it was "ok" I'm thinking of filing assualt charges against him, seriously. It wasn't an accident, it was a deliberate, malicious act with an intended victim, although another person was the victim. he keeps saying my back isn't broken or I wouldn't be walking--yes, people can walk with partial fractures, I've done so. Then he keeps saying I already had an bad spine, so what? So what, you little s... its not like I have nothing to lose.
I know this isn't the right forum for this, but I'm sick of being this kid's victim. I'm looking into any process to dissolve the adoption, which isn't easy. In texas, if you try to dissolve an adoption, they consider it child abandonment, but surely, with a woman who's health has deteroriated steadliy over the years, a kid with a history of sociopathic behavior, and having victimized me many times in the past, surely there must be some recourse. I can't be expected to be a victim in my own home, all the while provide him with counseling, etc. The last time I took him to counseling he used their hotline and made false reports about me, which landed him in detention for 12 weeks, 12 weeks of relative peace in the family. !2 weeks we didn't have to lock up our credit cards, wallets, computers, etc. its to the point now my dh and I take showers in turn, with the other standing guard, ds has been known to slip in while we're in the shower and steal from our wallets, etc, hey I can't be expected to take my purse in there with me.
surely a person is entitled to rerasonable use of their own home free from hazards that have been inflicted by the actions of another. We must have some sort of recourse. In short, how much crap is a parent expected to take while meeting their parental obligations? I can't meet those obligations, anyways, if I'm in a wheelchair.
Well, my back is really acting up today, along with the balance issues. DS still thinks what he did was ok, just a harmless prank. He buttered the floor in the bathrooom and kitchen because he wanted his sister to fall. Well, I was the one who fell instead. He still doesn't think there's a problem, he says I've never raised a teenager, so I don't know what a teen prank is. Hey, I'm not taking this crap!
I have a right to move about in my own home without constantly watching for "pranks". He still thinks it was "ok" I'm thinking of filing assualt charges against him, seriously. It wasn't an accident, it was a deliberate, malicious act with an intended victim, although another person was the victim. he keeps saying my back isn't broken or I wouldn't be walking--yes, people can walk with partial fractures, I've done so. Then he keeps saying I already had an bad spine, so what? So what, you little s... its not like I have nothing to lose.
I know this isn't the right forum for this, but I'm sick of being this kid's victim. I'm looking into any process to dissolve the adoption, which isn't easy. In texas, if you try to dissolve an adoption, they consider it child abandonment, but surely, with a woman who's health has deteroriated steadliy over the years, a kid with a history of sociopathic behavior, and having victimized me many times in the past, surely there must be some recourse. I can't be expected to be a victim in my own home, all the while provide him with counseling, etc. The last time I took him to counseling he used their hotline and made false reports about me, which landed him in detention for 12 weeks, 12 weeks of relative peace in the family. !2 weeks we didn't have to lock up our credit cards, wallets, computers, etc. its to the point now my dh and I take showers in turn, with the other standing guard, ds has been known to slip in while we're in the shower and steal from our wallets, etc, hey I can't be expected to take my purse in there with me.
surely a person is entitled to rerasonable use of their own home free from hazards that have been inflicted by the actions of another. We must have some sort of recourse. In short, how much crap is a parent expected to take while meeting their parental obligations? I can't meet those obligations, anyways, if I'm in a wheelchair.
OMG, I am speechless. This post is very disturbing.
OMG, I am speechless. This post is very disturbing.
I realize its getting OT and not in the appropriate forum, it started with me discussing my mysterious aliment, then turned into this.
There's obviously more to this story than I can post here, or I'd type all night, but we have had ds in counseling, been to many professionals, all to no avail. If anything, the counseling actually makes the problem worse by somehow "siding" with the kid. They don't realize it, but those counselors are actually validating his behavior and giving him an out.
From now on, I'm taking the advice a policeman gave us---quit being his parent, just be his caregiver. do what the law requires, nothing more. Stop worrying about things we truly have no control over, quit the frigging counseling, which just reinforces all this crap. Wait for a court order for anything more than the bare bones that would be required from foster care.
And document, document, document, pictures, er visits, etc, I intend to file an assualt charge against him for the butter the floor trick. His intended victim was his sister, a minor, I was the victim, a disabled person, assualt against either is a felony in texas. he's got to learn, do the crime, do the time. he's been setting us up for a "fall" for years, making constant false reports to CPS, school, anyone who would listen. Our lives have become a nightmare. We intend to seek legal counsel to see what we can do to dissolve the adoption, if his needs are so profound, perhaps someone else should provide them, we can't grapple with all of his "special needs" and be his victim at the same time. enough is enough.
Meanwhile, I'm still wondering about my lack of balance, I've lost my ability to function, wondering if I could have MS or some related disorder, will see a neurologist next week, they can also evaluate my spine. I can't live with a constant hazard in my own home, perhaps this will be the turning point for all of us.
I know this isn't the right forum for this, but I'm sick of being this kid's victim. I'm looking into any process to dissolve the adoption, which isn't easy. In texas, if you try to dissolve an adoption, they consider it child abandonment, but surely, with a woman who's health has deteroriated steadliy over the years, a kid with a history of sociopathic behavior, and having victimized me many times in the past, surely there must be some recourse. I can't be expected to be a victim in my own home, all the while provide him with counseling, etc. The last time I took him to counseling he used their hotline and made false reports about me, which landed him in detention for 12 weeks, 12 weeks of relative peace in the family. !2 weeks we didn't have to lock up our credit cards, wallets, computers, etc. its to the point now my dh and I take showers in turn, with the other standing guard, ds has been known to slip in while we're in the shower and steal from our wallets, etc, hey I can't be expected to take my purse in there with me.
surely a person is entitled to rerasonable use of their own home free from hazards that have been inflicted by the actions of another. We must have some sort of recourse. In short, how much crap is a parent expected to take while meeting their parental obligations? I can't meet those obligations, anyways, if I'm in a wheelchair.
I don't know. I have mixed feelings about this. If he was your natural child; you couldn't just give him back.
Teens stealing is common. Buy yourself a safe for medications; put what you need in a 7 day container.
If you really feel he is mentally unstable - maybe you should ask for his adoption file. I know someone that placed a child for adoption that ended up being diagnosed bi-polar. You wonder if the child they gave up is bi-polar.
My "mother" placed a boy for adoption; turns out there's autism in the family. She has some sort of issues herself.
You could probably prove that you need more background on his bio-family.
Ok, finally saw the neurosurgeon today. His conclusion---possibly arthritic compression of my cervical spine (ie neck). I spent the entire day getting tests, MRI's, etc, of course, no conclusion as of yet, but results should be in by this week. One thing for sure, its definitely NOT in my imagination!
Well, I am feeling somewhat better today and regaining my balance, but still don't have the MRI results back, probably will by Friday.
The hassle we went through was ridiculous. Getting past the front office to the doctor was a major hurdle, but finally we're in, and have some data we can deal with. I still have problems with balance and weakness, I can't go out shopping unless I have a grocery cart to hold onto, so guess I'm condemned to Walmart!
Also, its self-feeding. the less I walk, the weaker I get. I try to do exercises every day, I do see an improvement, and we have a treadmill, which keeps my muscles going, at least motion going. But getting the coordination and confidence back is the major problem.
Doc feels it could be my neck, although I don't have any pain in the neck area. he says this type of problem often stems from a compression that inteferes with transmission of balance signals from the body to the brain.
Meanwhile, I have so much to do, we just moved, trying to get settled in our new home, get the old home sold, and get kids ready for school, to do all this when a person can barely walk is quite a challenge!
All I can do is keep on trying, I just don't know what can be done once the diagnosis is made, if I need surgery, I'm certainly in no position to do so in the near future.
Water therapy is good for people with spinal issues. I have them and love my water therapy. Water gives you 12 x the resistance of air but it sopports you so you don't get sore. I go 3 x week to my public pool which offers a class for us elderly/disabled folks. Call the arthritis foundaiton near you - or of your state - and ask if there is a water exercise class nearby.
Water therapy is good for people with spinal issues. I have them and love my water therapy. Water gives you 12 x the resistance of air but it sopports you so you don't get sore. I go 3 x week to my public pool which offers a class for us elderly/disabled folks. Call the arthritis foundaiton near you - or of your state - and ask if there is a water exercise class nearby.
Sorry, your suggestion is well-intended, but a hot button for me. I can't navigate around a wet area, one step on a wet floor and I go slidding. also, because both ankles are fused and both knees only have minimal bend, I can't get in and out of a pool---no, I can't manage those ramps built into some pools.
I know your suggestion is well-intended, but water therapy has been suggested so many times in the past, I can't even get from the locker room to the pool, I slide at the slightest drop of water.
Besdies, I am waiting for the results of the tests done the other day, lets see where that goes.
And I also disagree that water therapy doesn't make you sore. The times I have managed to get into some sort of water therapy, I've experienced massive flare ups a few hours later. The water itself creates a resistance greater than atmospheric against your joints. it does help a lot of people with osteoarthritis, but I have RA (rheumatoid arthritis) and I've found water therapy to cause even more pain, if I can manage to get into a pool in the first place.
Well, sorry it won't work for you but it works for a lot of people. I wear water shoes which do not allow me to slide - really meant for hiking slot canyons, if you know what they are.
Well, sorry it won't work for you but it works for a lot of people. I wear water shoes which do not allow me to slide - really meant for hiking slot canyons, if you know what they are.
Yes, I know what you mean....Lands End makes a really nice pair, with arch supports and non-skid bottoms. If I can get in a pool at all, they give me traction on the bottom.
I just don't know what to make of all this, I realize some sort of exercise will help, at least we're on our way. I should hear something back from the neurologist tomorrow.
Tonight I managed to get to the grocery store. About 2-3 weeks ago, I couldn't even get out of the car, couldn't get inside the store while hanging onto the basket. Then I managed to grocery shop only if dh was right at my side, I was hanging onto a basket with sweaty palms, and took enough valium to knock out a horse.
Well, tonight, no valium! And no panic, dh was with me, but I didn't need him in constant sight. And I'm getting better at going "out in the open". A few weeks ago I had to hug the walls, that is, I panicked if I wasn't within touch point of something, a wall, counter, something. Tonight I could actually walk across an open floor, holding onto a basket, of course.
Success is coming slowly, but its coming. Its party physical, partly pychological. I've had disabilities all my adult life, but never had fear as a component. The neurologist thinks its might be a neck problem, somehow my brain is not receiving correct signals that my balance is ok, does that make sense? Well, at least I'm on the path to some sort of answer.
Thanks for your suggestions, southern Belle, every little thing helps if it helps!
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