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Old 05-25-2011, 06:42 AM
Location: Bucks, UK
523 posts, read 3,510,700 times
Reputation: 1154


when i am a patient, the absolute number one priority to me is getting the best quality of medical care possible - if i had a choice between having that delivered from a doctor who made me uncomfortable, or a less competent doctor who made me feel more comfortable, i would go for the former every time.

regarding gender, personally i couldnt care less - im just as comfortable being naked and examined by either sex. im there for medical care, not a massage or a date.

it is inevitable that cultural or religious factors come into play in deciding how comfortable an individual is with being examined, but everyone should remember that if you make it difficult for a doctor to examine you, the only person who will miss out is you as a patient. misdiagnosis is much more likely with inadequate exposure and examination.
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Old 05-31-2011, 08:53 PM
4 posts, read 11,461 times
Reputation: 28
Default Don't die from modesty or embarassment

Originally Posted by Cupcake77 View Post
I am so glad I was sedated for mine. There's some things I rather not be aware of.

When I had my colonoscopy (I'm hoping that everyone is still laughing), my gastroenterologist asked if several students could watch my procedure; since several of them were my former interns, I said: "sure".. Gee, there were about 4 of them, but no matter. they watched and got a running narrative of how easy the procedure was. I made a joke about them seeing at least one perfect a-hole...anyway..Today, one timid med student cornered me in the cafeteria and thanked me for letting her observe my colonoscopy.......seems that she was able, after actually seeing one live, to convince her dad to get one and he had frank colon cancer....getting a resection right now and it looks like he is going to be fine.......I hope that every patient's modesty is protected, but I'm glad that I let these students watch mine.........probably saved a life...what was the key? I was asked first.....
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Old 05-31-2011, 09:13 PM
4 posts, read 11,461 times
Reputation: 28
Default Never heard of this...

Originally Posted by Whatsthenews View Post
If a Dr did a pelvic exam that was medically unneccesary, without the patients SPECIFIC consent, it would be sexual assault.

If you really care that much about modesty, please go to a private hospital. Do NOT go to a teaching hospital. Problem solved.

So you're saying that teaching hospitals are less likely to respect patients modesty and privacy?

Truly sick people don't care about most of these things. They are too busy struggling to live.

But this is why ALL medical professionals should be the patients advocate.

Have you heard of the Hippocratic oath?

Pelvic exams under anesthesia w/o consent? Never heard of this; I graducated in 1984, did a residency at a great teaching hospital and NEVER heard of this...I would have kicked anyone's a*s who even suggested this...at a teaching hospital, we were taught to treat the patients like family; NEVER would we treat anyone like a piece of meat......I went into research and rarely touched a patient for many years......my moniker "newpatient 2011" illustrates that I haven't even received minimal meidical care myself until recently..........I have nearly 30 years of medical experience a fact that I usually hide when seeking care for myself; let me tell you this: most young docs really do care about their patients...modesty included..........FWIW (and my opinion may be worth little)..if you are a patient at a teaching hospital in the USA, you will receive pretty damned good, if not great, medical care........
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Old 07-07-2011, 11:15 PM
Location: Illinois.
1 posts, read 2,489 times
Reputation: 10
Default Medical myopia.

Originally Posted by Stratford, Ct. Resident View Post
Simple solution: Don't go to the hospital! And then, when your dead because you were too "modest", the mortician will view your formerly modest body.
If you run out of gas on a lonely stretch of road,who is to blame....If you go to a hospital and are treated poorly,forget the modesty part....They removed the wrong kidney,led etc,who is to blame.
What I ask is for people to respect my wishes where practical,if I make a mistake and neglect to ask,it is my fault and if I ask for something that might prolong my stay please inform me as I am not a doctor or nurse....Having said that do not leave me uncovered in the hall outside of recovery while you have a gab fest,this happened to me in an Illinois hospital and I awoke to find myself nude and aching all over from a negative reaction to the anesthestic which caused convulsions and nearly cost me my life.The doctor lied to me about this and when confronted the next day stormed out of the room and the head nurse came in and tried scolding me into silence until I informed her that a complete explanation by the doctor would prevent a law suit if I believed him,I did and he then became a human being,not a diety and explained in detail what happened.Six months later he opperated again and woke up in the middle of my opperatio much to the surprise of all present....Where does thefault lie for any of this....To the medical people on this forum it is probably my fault,to anyone else??

Cave Ursus
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Old 02-19-2016, 12:49 PM
11 posts, read 10,865 times
Reputation: 12
Hello: I'm new here. I just found this forum even though it's old, the issue of patient modesty is still a problem today. I agree with what Modest Woman originally wrote. There are today a lot of people who still (for whatever their reasons may be), don't want to be treated by a member of the opposite sex. Especially when it comes to intimate procedures or tests. Male modesty is not new. Yes there are some guys that either don't mind or, prefer a woman to take care of them while in the hospital. But the fact of the matter is there are and always will be some men out there who just don't want anything to do with female caregivers. It's not going to go away.

Hospitals, clinics, medical offices and the like, need to acknowledge this and stop ignoring it as if it doesn't exist. The need exists and the healthcare industry must step up and do whatever it takes to fill the need. Yes, there is a shortage of males and females throughout the healthcare industry. People are being asked to do more with less all the time. That is why the industry as a whole is losing the "human" element of the healthcare equation. Young men and women need to be encouraged more to enter the healthcare field. Everybody should support the idea of equal pay for equal work whether you are a man or woman makes no difference.

Healthcare jobs are very stressful there is a lot of burnout. We need as human beings to support these people wherever and whenever we can. Institutions should be required to hire an equal amount of qualified men and women for open positions wherever and whenever possible. When a man goes in for a test or procedure, the institution should if at all possible without thinking about it, set that man up with a male tech, nurse, or doctor unless the man specifically requests a female caregiver. Next time you go to the hospital watch how the staff treats female patients when they come in. It's like a well played symphony, all done without ever really thinking about how or what to do. She's brought to an area, given instructions as to what they want her to do, then they ask her if she requires any assistance. If not, they leave her and make sure she has complete privacy to complete the assigned task. They come back to check on her. Knocking or asking first before entering. After entering her space, they make sure she's covered and comfortable. Her needs are met before they do anything else, without her ever having to ask. She's treated like a "human being".

Now a guy goes in. They take him back. She hands him a gown & tells him to take off his clothes and put it on then if she's thinking about it, she partially closes the curtain or door and goes about getting the area ready for the doctor all the while the guy is still standing there wondering when/if she's ever gonna leave so he can change. She looks over and sees he's not getting undressed. He tells her he was waiting for her to leave & close the curtain. She tells him don't be modest, I've seen it all before. Then asks him if he needs help. He says no then she rather than leave & give him the same level of respect & dignity they gave the woman, goes back to getting the area ready for the doctor. The man told her he was waiting for her to leave. She should have left! If he was a woman he'd never have had to say that.

This scenario with men, plays out everyday in hospitals and clinics all over this country. When it comes to male modesty, hospital personnel all over this country don't think it exists therefore they aren't thinking about it like they do with women so the man's needs (which are as real as a woman's), are never met. It's because the thought of male modesty is not a part of their culture like female modesty. When it comes to healthcare, in this aspect, men and women are not equals. And that Ladies and Gentlemen is why so many men all across this country have bailed out on the healthcare industry. They're tired of being humiliated and ignored. Next time you hear about a male relative or friend dying young ask yourself is it because the healthcare industry turned it's back on him when it came to common decency and respect. Common decency and respect should be given to all people who walk thru the doors of any healthcare institution. We're ALL human beings first. Patients second. Best regards to everyone, Soul

Last edited by in_newengland; 02-19-2016 at 01:58 PM.. Reason: inserted paragraghs for legibility
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Old 02-19-2016, 01:34 PM
Status: "Keep It SIMPLE!!" (set 13 days ago)
Location: Southern California
26,545 posts, read 9,919,553 times
Reputation: 17103
I never gave this much thought, when I NEED a doctor I really don't care if they are male or female. I'm a female and I do prefer a female and my integrative MD is a female...she does my annual breast exam and I otherwise I do my own. If I needed a pap exam she would do that...but I don't. Plus I do not run to doctors, I heal myself as best I know how.
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Old 02-19-2016, 07:26 PM
Location: Mostly in my head
19,865 posts, read 57,982,807 times
Reputation: 19187
You don't really know how women are treated unless you are a male Healthcare provider. Which I seriously doubt or you would not be so uptight about modesty.

When I was in a teaching hospital after giving birth and having complications, residents and interns had to examine me. I didn't like it but I understand the necessity of training the next generation. Who will care for me elsewise?
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Old 02-20-2016, 03:50 PM
Location: Middle of the ocean
35,184 posts, read 22,173,056 times
Reputation: 50776
If you are exceptionally modest then just tell them up front. No one is going to assume you want male doctors/nurses, so you should explain that when you make the appointment.

If it is an emergency room setting and you are willing to wait until all males are free, then it's probably not an emergency.

I've been to docs and hospitals frequently for both myself and my spouse. I did not notice any difference in treatment.
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Old 02-21-2016, 05:40 PM
11 posts, read 10,865 times
Reputation: 12
Hi Mikala:

Everyone knows up front what I am asking for as I call facilities before setting up any appointment to see if they can meet my needs.


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Old 02-22-2016, 06:37 PM
Location: In a vehicle.
5,603 posts, read 3,631,577 times
Reputation: 9343
Heh! I had a cortisone shot in the hip, nurse said "I kind of have to expose you more"

I replied "You ain't seeing anything you haven't seen before"

She smiled and pulled it further exposing my genitals...Nothing more said.....I'm beyond caring at my age.
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