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Old 04-29-2016, 08:45 PM
 
3,094 posts, read 1,199,120 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by villageidiot1 View Post
I grew up in the 50s-70s. I don't understand what you mean by, "Our modesty was bullied and shamed out of us." Boys in my junior high, and what had previously been a high school took swimming class in the nude. By the time I got there in 1967, the majority of the boys were wearing swimsuits, but you never had the excuse that you forgot your swimsuit. We had to shower before and after swimming in a small shower room with 6 nozzles being shared by around 30 boys in a few minutes.

There were times we swam nude in the river, creeks or lakes. I don't understand who would've bullied or shamed you. I was also in the Boy Scouts, numerous sports teams and spent time in the Army living in a 1940 Army barracks. Yes, I understand things are different today. I've taught middle school physical education classes where the boys change in a toilet stall. They would've been laughed at in 1967.

Regarding being treated for medical issues, I feel much more comfortable with females. With the number of women who have seen my naked body, I feel more comfortable with them as opposed to a potential gay man.
The issue is that when we were growing up the gang showers and nude swimming classes were mandatory and any boy that protested got called a sissy or worse by the gym teachers. I learned quickly to be OK with being nude with other guys but it was tough for the overweight boys, the late bloomers, and the under endowed who likely wouldn't have done this if they weren't bullied and shamed into it. Whether we were OK with it or not we all got the message that we were not to have any expectation of modesty. None of this occurred with the girls.

In 6th grade for the annual school physical the boys were made to strip down to their tighty whities in the locker room, them march up the stairs and down a corridor to wait in a long line outside the nurses office waiting for our turn. Nobody stopped girls or women teachers from walking past us while we stood there in line in the hallway. When we finally got into the nurses office, we then got to drop the underpants for the female nurse & her female assistant. For reasons unknown to me the interior door from the nurses office to the main office was left open. It just happened to be right where we stood in front of the nurse, knowing that women in the office or others walking in could see us as nature made us. We boys knew it would be made worse for us by the nurse, gym teacher, or others if we dared protest. Again, the message that boys were not entitled to any modesty was pretty strong. The girls had their physicals in private somewhere.

As a young pubescent teen I was hospitalized for a few days. A nurse walks in and just yanks my gown off me leaving me totally naked and she proceeds to bath me. No curtain drawn, no door shut. I was there for full viewing by anyone walking down the hall and by anyone, staff or visitors coming to see my roommate. Same message that boys were expected to expose themselves without complaint to any medical person or authority figure that demanded it. I am sure this is not how the pubescent teen girls got bathed.

Having grown up this way I am comfortable saying any modesty was bullied or shamed out of me even if indirectly by the consistent actions of the adults in charge back then. My issue is being treated respectfully. If my genitals don't have to be exposed then they shouldn't be except when and where I choose to expose them. I have had more intimate exposure with female nurses & techs than most people will ever experience. It does make me self conscious but I am OK with it so long as exposure is restricted to that which is necessary and they otherwise are respectful in how they go about it. Most female nurses & techs these days are respectful in this regard and have been trained on minimizing exposure, but there are some that still don't get it. Whether they truly think privacy doesn't matter for guys or they're on some feminist power trip I don't know. Rather than me having to be the one to bring them into this century, if I have a choice I will always go with male medical staff. Its just easier. I've spent too much time in locker rooms as a kid and as an adult to ever be concerned about being exposed to other males in medical settings. Some men such as you are more comfortable with women medical providers and that's OK too.

The problem with the medical world is that for the men who are truly modest they usually can't find male techs nor can they get male nurses very often. Unless more men go into nursing and med tech careers, this is going to become a bigger problem in the years to come given how extremely modest so many of the young guys are these days. There are already too many men avoiding healthcare due to modesty concerns and we've got a generation of guys coming up who are even more modest.
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Old 04-29-2016, 09:54 PM
 
Location: Georgia, USA
25,136 posts, read 30,034,331 times
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About 9% of US nurses are male.

Nursing Statistics | Minority Nurse

It looks like there should be opportunities for men in nursing. Perhaps high school guidance counselors should look for good candidates and encourage them.
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Old 04-30-2016, 06:02 AM
 
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I agree Suzy. Just as there are programs encouraging women to go into the certain traditionally male careers, we need to do the same encouraging guys to go into nursing and med tech careers. Interestingly, the wives of a couple of the male nurses my wife had were also nurses.

Yesterday I told my mid-50's friend about my surprise in the colonoscopy finding the 5 polyps and how glad I am I had it done. He didn't take the bait. In the recent past he proudly said in the usual tough guy persona that he doesn't go to the doctors for anything. He is short and round and I can't help but wonder if he just doesn't want to be exposed to women medical staff.
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Old 04-30-2016, 11:24 AM
 
3,431 posts, read 3,281,807 times
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It's different for everybody. I think sensible health care workers would realize that.

I was a bit later in developing much sense of modesty, I guess. When I was a young adolescent with scoliosis, it wasn't unusual for a couple of residents or student whatevers to be with the doctor/brace technician during appointments. But I was always asked if it was ok with me first. (circa the mid to late 1980s). I never had a problem with it. I can see how some kids would, though. And adults. Typically, I find medical workers are quite professional and ask if I'm ok with this or that situation. If I had a preference for male or female health care workers to attend to me, I think I'd ask for arrangements well in advance of the actual appointment, though, to make sure staff were available.
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Old 05-01-2016, 10:02 AM
 
Location: Columbia SC
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I have no modesty in front of medical people. I say just let us get this done. My wife was the same way but maybe because she was an RN.
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Old 05-01-2016, 10:20 AM
 
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A question here concerning the professional status of healthcare workers. I have read many comments saying that patients should not have modesty concerns in medical settings because healthcare workers are all professionals who don't think about a patient's genitals any different than they would the patient's elbows, that they're just body parts. I don't know what the qualifications are in other States but here in Vermont, an LNA (Licensed Nursing Assistant, our version of a CNA) is only required to have had 75 hours of classroom and clinical training, 30 hours of work under the supervision of an RN, be 18, and pass a test. They don't need to be a high school graduate. Whereas I am comfortable considering MD's, PA's, NP's, and RN's as being professionals who spent years acquiring their skills and licenses and who have a lot to lose if they behave unprofessionally, I have a hard time thinking of 18 year old newly minted LNA's as being medical professionals. A female RN can catheterize me but I don't think I'd let a young female LNA bath me. I am not convinced she has the maturity to see male genitals as just another body part. What do others think?

As an aside here in Vermont anyone can be a Medical Assistant if they can find an employer to call them one. There is no licensing or mandated requirements. Doctors who want to use their just out of high school receptionist as a chaperone can introduce her as a Medical Assistant to the patient. I am thus leery of anyone that is called an MA.
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Old 05-01-2016, 10:29 AM
 
Location: Middle of the ocean
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If I needed to be bathed by some low paid worker I guess I would give a 2nd thought if he was going to go talk about my genitals to his 20 something friends.

I guess as a women we are used to men doing that anyway. Meaning "boy, did you see her rack."

Plus, if I am unable to bathe myself, there is something wrong enough where someone seeing me naked is my least concern.

Is your junk somehow noteworthy? I mean women rarely talk about a guys penis, and a male nurse is probably even LESS inclined to bring up some guys junk in conversation.

Do you have any idea what women go through during childbirth? Hang your modesty at the door because it is allowed in that situation. Everyone up (and I mean up) in your business.
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Old 05-01-2016, 12:40 PM
 
Location: S. FL (hell for me-wife loves it)
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I'm a man, and I also have a bit of modesty. Biker, as another poster mentioned, it just depends on the individual. I'm not going to die over whose helping me, male or female, but if I had a choice, I'd prefer someone (of either sex) who is sensitive to my feelings.

I think it is insensitive to bring up someone's 'junk.' My 'junk' isn't special, but it certainly is mine, and if it is not necessary, I don't feel like sharing it with everyone who happens to be around during an examination, etc...whatever the circumstance.

I suppose some people get poked and prodded on so much it becomes routine. For me, that is not the case. Wherein, I would find it disconcerting if the entire event was not completely professional. And I am old school, so maybe there is a generational difference, as you yourself have pointed out.

If you feel that way, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. The fact that you could pick who worked with you is great, and I'm glad it turned out well.
I also hope that the polyps turn out benign and an easy removal for you.


PS: Welcome to CD.

Last edited by TerraDown; 05-01-2016 at 01:17 PM..
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Old 05-01-2016, 01:53 PM
 
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Mikala43 & Terradown, partly where I am coming from is the age issue. A 50 year old LNA/CNA has seen it all/done it all and has the maturity of her years on the job. An 18 or 20 year old hasn't. So long as the 50 year old uses proper procedures (draping, pulling the curtain/closing the door, telling the patient what is going to be done etc) I'd probably be OK with being bathed by her. I am self conscious more than I am modest and my issue is being treated with respect far more than it is who sees what.

No there isn't anything remarkable about me, mostly. I'm in pretty good shape for someone that's 63 but there is one thing about which I am extremely self conscious. I lost a testicle in an accident when a young pubescent teen (why I was in the hospital at that age noted in a previous post). Didn't stop me from dating, marrying, having children, showering in locker rooms, and so forth but I have always been self conscious nonetheless. Years ago a young nurse commented to me "I see you only have one testicle". That fact had no bearing on my medical care at that time but she said it anyway. Why I don't know. I suspect had I only one arm she wouldn't have felt compelled to say "I see you only have one arm". I was somewhere between mortified and humiliated, and she was an RN. This is why the age of the "professional" can be an issue with me, especially if the professional only has a couple month's training and may not even have graduated high school as might be the case with an LNA/CNA.
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Old 05-01-2016, 07:51 PM
 
3,431 posts, read 3,281,807 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Biker53 View Post
Mikala43 & Terradown, partly where I am coming from is the age issue. A 50 year old LNA/CNA has seen it all/done it all and has the maturity of her years on the job. An 18 or 20 year old hasn't. So long as the 50 year old uses proper procedures (draping, pulling the curtain/closing the door, telling the patient what is going to be done etc) I'd probably be OK with being bathed by her. I am self conscious more than I am modest and my issue is being treated with respect far more than it is who sees what.

No there isn't anything remarkable about me, mostly. I'm in pretty good shape for someone that's 63 but there is one thing about which I am extremely self conscious. I lost a testicle in an accident when a young pubescent teen (why I was in the hospital at that age noted in a previous post). Didn't stop me from dating, marrying, having children, showering in locker rooms, and so forth but I have always been self conscious nonetheless. Years ago a young nurse commented to me "I see you only have one testicle". That fact had no bearing on my medical care at that time but she said it anyway. Why I don't know. I suspect had I only one arm she wouldn't have felt compelled to say "I see you only have one arm". I was somewhere between mortified and humiliated, and she was an RN. This is why the age of the "professional" can be an issue with me, especially if the professional only has a couple month's training and may not even have graduated high school as might be the case with an LNA/CNA.
It all comes down to an individual's comfort zone. There are personal care workers, even hospital orderlies, who don't have extensive medical school training, and they assist with patients in various states of undress. Maybe some patients are more comfortable with health care staff who have experience. Just my opinion, but, a young female nurse who has experience from nursing school (not to mention maybe babysitting and changing diapers, etc.), yes, she'll be as clinical and detached as anyone else... it's all just body parts. I think a health care worker would get desensitized pretty fast.

Some women prefer female OB/GYNs, but I don't care. That's a bit invasive though, and not really like standard nudity in a medical setting.
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