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Old 08-27-2010, 05:41 AM
 
Location: St. Louis
9,973 posts, read 17,888,753 times
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I second the poster who suggested separate bedrooms for you and hubby. This could be temporary until you get enough sleep. I would not give the baby benadryl--I don't think it would hurt him, but it could have the opposite effect to what you desire--my dd had an allergy once when she was a baby and I gave her some B syrup and she was up all night! So no, don't try that one.

It sounds like your hubby needs to have his allergies checked out too. If he's using his inhaler all the time, then there's an allergen in the house that needs to go. Do you guys have a cat? A mold problem? Something is setting him off. Or is he addicted to that inhaler? That happened to me once and the doc wouldn't prescribe them any more which made me panic so I went to the pharmacy at 3:00 am and bought a primatene mist inhaler and it broke my addiction to the other one immediately and now I never need one.

And I know this one will be controversial, but I took my babies to bed with me when they were little and it really helped me get the sleep I needed, b/c they slept better. I was a nursing mom though and it just made sense for us. Yes, they learned to sleep in their own beds by a reasonable age. Yep, I finally got my college girl out of my bed when she moved to the dorm. (Just kidding!)
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Old 08-27-2010, 08:53 AM
 
4,267 posts, read 5,452,652 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stepka View Post
And I know this one will be controversial, but I took my babies to bed with me when they were little and it really helped me get the sleep I needed, b/c they slept better. I was a nursing mom though and it just made sense for us. Yes, they learned to sleep in their own beds by a reasonable age. Yep, I finally got my college girl out of my bed when she moved to the dorm. (Just kidding!)
Me too. It really helped us both sleep.
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Old 08-28-2010, 09:13 AM
 
9,412 posts, read 12,101,689 times
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Wow, where do I start with this post?

Firstly I would change the Pediatrician, anyone suggesting an 18 month old has ADHD is on crack.

I had 2 children who never slept through the night until they were 2, it's normal albeit unpleasant. Try some natural remedies like lavender under a pillow.

Your husband sounds incredibly selfish, get rid of him. Ooops, wait, that's a bit extreme. Encourage him to see a Dr and get his allergies or sleep apnea in check. Until then sleep in a separate room. I think you need to sit down and discuss these problems with him demanding your time and energy.

All in all it sounds as if you have many issues on your plate at the moment. You can't fix everything, all you can do it take care of yourself so you can be a good Mother.
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Old 08-28-2010, 10:56 AM
 
3,627 posts, read 13,144,288 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dorthy View Post
Me too. It really helped us both sleep.
I also did that for about the first 6 months. Of course I would not do if I were taking any kind of drug. They also have cosleepers that go to the side of the bed if you are concerned about rolling over. But this baby is 1 1/2 I would just have some nights of letting him cry it out and he will learn to sleep.

You pretty much expect to NOT sleep much when you have a baby.

You are kind of paying a price for having one late in life when............
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Old 08-29-2010, 07:24 AM
 
Location: NJ
12,620 posts, read 22,560,801 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MaryleeII View Post
Benedryl for the baby..its over-the-counter
Reality is that they pulled all the infant products we used to have.
We were going to get some baby dimetap & they do not make it any more.
All they allow you to give is Tylenol type products
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Old 08-29-2010, 07:38 AM
 
Location: NJ
12,620 posts, read 22,560,801 times
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I think there are a few things going on here; not sure if I'm going to touch on your hubby. The main concern is you & the baby.

I'm having issues sleeping due to age & it's not pleasant. It's exhausting. I can't imagine adding a baby to the mix.

Is he (baby) on a schedule? What time does he actually get up during the day/morning?
How many naps are you giving him? Also how long are the naps?
At his age, he should either be taking 1 shortish nap (1 1/2 - 2 hours max) after lunch or cut the naps out. My daughter stopped napping at that age because she wouldn't go to bed - a few nights of that & I was done. I'd rather have a cranky kid during the day where I can control the nap then a cranky kid all night. If she was very cranky, I'd rock her or we'd take a drive - then let her take a short (hour) nap.

Once dinner comes; I cleaned up, then it was bath time followed by quiet time - whether it was watching a calm program or actual quiet play like coloring (age appropriate). Then a light snack and bed. It's all about routine.

You also have to get the house ready for night - kids that are wound up, I used to not use over head lights, just lamps. I'd put night lights in hallways. If you watch any of the shows on TLC - when they have issues with putting kids to sleep the house is always bright. I never understood that.

I agree you should put a small bed or futon in the baby's room. Let your hub sleep alone.

As far as the bottle; I think I would do one thing at a time; get them on a routine 1st, see if they sleep better; then you'll know what to do with the bottle.

Usually when they wake up like that it's because of teeth or ear - well my kids anyway. I never really had sleep issues with my kids because mom needs her sleep - even if I had to pay for it during the day with a cranky kid.
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Old 08-29-2010, 08:03 AM
 
Location: Canada
3,432 posts, read 3,616,359 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Roselvr View Post
I think there are a few things going on here; not sure if I'm going to touch on your hubby. The main concern is you & the baby.

I'm having issues sleeping due to age & it's not pleasant. It's exhausting. I can't imagine adding a baby to the mix.

Is he (baby) on a schedule? What time does he actually get up during the day/morning?
How many naps are you giving him? Also how long are the naps?
At his age, he should either be taking 1 shortish nap (1 1/2 - 2 hours max) after lunch or cut the naps out. My daughter stopped napping at that age because she wouldn't go to bed - a few nights of that & I was done. I'd rather have a cranky kid during the day where I can control the nap then a cranky kid all night. If she was very cranky, I'd rock her or we'd take a drive - then let her take a short (hour) nap.

Once dinner comes; I cleaned up, then it was bath time followed by quiet time - whether it was watching a calm program or actual quiet play like coloring (age appropriate). Then a light snack and bed. It's all about routine.

You also have to get the house ready for night - kids that are wound up, I used to not use over head lights, just lamps. I'd put night lights in hallways. If you watch any of the shows on TLC - when they have issues with putting kids to sleep the house is always bright. I never understood that.

I agree you should put a small bed or futon in the baby's room. Let your hub sleep alone.

As far as the bottle; I think I would do one thing at a time; get them on a routine 1st, see if they sleep better; then you'll know what to do with the bottle.

Usually when they wake up like that it's because of teeth or ear - well my kids anyway. I never really had sleep issues with my kids because mom needs her sleep - even if I had to pay for it during the day with a cranky kid.

I don't agree with this. A child this young is way too young to stop napping. Kids should be having a nap until 3 years of age at which point they ususally naturally give up their naps.
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Old 08-29-2010, 08:24 AM
 
Location: NJ
12,620 posts, read 22,560,801 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lisalan View Post
I don't agree with this. A child this young is way too young to stop napping. Kids should be having a nap until 3 years of age at which point they ususally naturally give up their naps.
You're entitled to your opinion.
My kids went to bed between 7:30 & 8:30 IIRC - they slept through the night; woke up about 6:30 - 7. Every kid is different. I know many people that stopped naps by 2. It depends on the child. Some don't need them every day
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Old 08-29-2010, 05:58 PM
 
Location: St. Louis
9,973 posts, read 17,888,753 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lisalan View Post
I don't agree with this. A child this young is way too young to stop napping. Kids should be having a nap until 3 years of age at which point they ususally naturally give up their naps.
My oldest quit napping right at her second b-day and my youngest napped up until kindergarten. My oldest just started college and still can't take naps and my youngest will come home and take one every day that she doesn't have something else going on after school, which is 10th grade. i hated when my oldest quit napping and was way ready for the youngest to stop. Kids.
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Old 08-29-2010, 06:21 PM
 
Location: Maine
2,270 posts, read 5,908,720 times
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My husband is a physician and states the following: (1) giving benedryl to a child to sleep is really bad advice; and (2) one cannot give a diagnosis of ADHD to an 18 month old.

I second the advice to see a psychiatrist post haste! You need to take care of yourself here so you can take care of your baby. Your words are huge red flags to me and you really, really need to get some help. Some help for you and some help for your relationship with your husband. If I read between the lines, I wonder if it is a physically abusive relationship. If so, please contact a domestic violence hotline (even if not physically abvusive. Just the fact that you seem to feel bullied and controlled means you are being abused) to get some help and learn how to be safe.

All kids are different where sleep (and all else) is concerned. Others have given good advice about consistent routines, bath with lavender wash before bed, letting the child cry it out (just say "I will see you in the morning" and leave for a few minutes. You can go back to reassure and then repeat "I will see you in the morning". Spread the time out longer and longer. I had to do this once with one of mine and really, while I dreaded it, it was much easier than I thought it was going to be.)

Please come back and let us know how you are doing.
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