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Old 05-01-2011, 09:58 PM
 
Location: Milwaukee
146 posts, read 356,654 times
Reputation: 113

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Hi

I am very concerned about my friend. He has been taking basically whatever drugs he can get his hands on for a few years. I know his favorite are opiates like oxycontin and also vallium, methodone, xanax. A few times a month he will take adderall and stay awake for three days. One day we went out to eat and he literally fell asleep on his plate because he hadn't slept for so long.

I used to work with him. Every morning before we would head out to work he would eat a couple opiate pills and maybe a couple other pills. I told him he was getting addicted but of course he said it wasn't a problem, he has things under control.

I am getting really concerned. I know at least three people who have died from overdoses, and I can't lose any more friends. He is a very hard headed type A personality that will not take advice and I don't know what to do...
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Old 05-01-2011, 11:47 PM
 
Location: Nantahala National Forest, NC
27,090 posts, read 7,937,261 times
Reputation: 30347
Are you familiar with behaviors of addicts? Typically, no matter what you do, say, or offer, none of it will be absorbed. Their only goal is to continue with the alcohol or drug of choice. That is it.

Family for this guy? Someone he listens to?? Therapy?? NA mtgs??
Pastor or mentor of his? Tell your concerns to someone close to him.
There is also arrest for posession/drug intoxication that might lead to court-ordered treatment.

Don't help by giving money, driving them to get drugs, letting them stay with you. Refuse to participate in their self-destruction.

And watch out...sometimes you must walk away to protect yourself...I have done it several times, recently decided to forego a long-term friendship, as she has been an alcoholic for 30 yrs and I am done with her...no more.
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Old 05-02-2011, 09:24 AM
 
1,963 posts, read 4,590,825 times
Reputation: 1443
The thing is that they want to have to change. Until they get to that point, then there is nothing that anyone can do.
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Old 05-02-2011, 11:55 AM
 
1,845 posts, read 3,375,759 times
Reputation: 2616
Quote:
Originally Posted by cl723 View Post
The thing is that they want to have to change. Until they get to that point, then there is nothing that anyone can do.
Agreed. At some point, he will crash and that is the time to step in and have him taken to rehab. You can try to talk to him before then, but he probably won't listen.
I once arrested a woman that had a 1 quart ziploc bag full of assorted pills. It included everything from Xanax to Adderall to Benadryl... whatever she could get her hands on. She would just take 2 or 3 at random and enjoy the ride. You can't help people like that without a looong visit to rehab.
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Old 05-02-2011, 01:19 PM
 
1,963 posts, read 4,590,825 times
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Yes, and even rehab won't do any good if someone wants to remain the same.
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Old 05-02-2011, 01:49 PM
 
Location: Mostly in my head
19,864 posts, read 60,072,079 times
Reputation: 19255
Quote:
Originally Posted by cl723 View Post
Yes, and even rehab won't do any good if someone wants to remain the same.
See for example, Lindsay Lohan.
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Old 05-02-2011, 08:43 PM
 
Location: Milwaukee
146 posts, read 356,654 times
Reputation: 113
Hmm, well I am still at a loss as to what to do then. I feel as if he is going to have some kind of catastrophe sooner than later, he has just been lucky so far. I am just really worried that one day hes going to eat too many opiates and never wake up.
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Old 05-02-2011, 09:20 PM
 
Location: Destrehan, Louisiana
2,192 posts, read 6,541,335 times
Reputation: 3630
I can tell you with me being an alcoholic that you can't do a thing until your friend is willing and ready to change his life.

I often feel that it's harder on family and friends because they see what is going on and the addict is in so much denial that they don't even have a clue that they are in trouble.

For your friends sake I hope you find a way to help him but until he's ready to change nothing will work.

busta
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Old 05-03-2011, 03:23 AM
 
Location: Tucson for awhile longer
8,876 posts, read 14,583,802 times
Reputation: 29128
Ultracorp, please feel free to check out a meeting of Al-Anon. While the organization was established to support relatives of alcoholics (both active or in recovery), a concerned friend such as yourself would also be welcome. You will meet people who have been in your shoes, whether the person you're supporting abuses alcohol or drugs (most abusers are cross-addicted these days). You can get some good advice about how to cope with your own stress and emotions and you'll learn what help you can and can't offer successfully.

The meetings are free, in many areas are scheduled on a daily basis, and can be found online or in your local phone book. There are also Nar-Anon meetings in some cities, established by people dealing with narcotic addicts. But addiction is addiction, and you'll be welcome at Al-Anon even if your friend isn't a drinker. Just pop into one and share the feelings you've expressed here. If you don't like it, you're under no obligation to continue. As they say at anonymous meetings, "Take what you like and leave the rest."

How to find a meeting in the US/Canada/Puerto Rico
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Old 05-03-2011, 04:54 AM
 
1,181 posts, read 2,803,752 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ultracorp View Post
Hmm, well I am still at a loss as to what to do then. I feel as if he is going to have some kind of catastrophe sooner than later, he has just been lucky so far. I am just really worried that one day hes going to eat too many opiates and never wake up.
You could try arranging an intervention but, unless he wants to change, it probably would do little good, at least long term.

Sometimes the only thing you can do for someone is pray for them and make sure you're doing nothing, even inadvertently to enable them to continue their addiction.
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