Questions about P/T for radial fracture of elbow (pain, surgery, arm)

[Regina14]

I asked some questions in an earlier post:
//www.city-data.com/forum/healt...red-elbow.html

I fell and fractured my left elbow on December 13. The orthopedic surgeon I saw on 12/17 said I would not need surgery; that I would probably regain most of my range of motion; and sent me to the P/T department. The very pleasant young P/T showed me some exercises and asked me if I would prefer to go to a P/T in the same health network who was a little closer to me; which I did. She gave me the number to call at a hospital that is closer; but did not indicate any urgency in making an appointment. So I didn't worry when the other hospital scheduled my next P/T for 12/30.

Now the situation is more complicated.

I'm not getting along well with my Physical Therapist. But that's not the real problem. I've seen her three times - 12/30 (when she told me I had been doing my exercises, previously assigned by the first therapist I saw, on 12/17; and showed me how to do them right), 12/7, and Friday 12/9. Each time, she has maneuvered my arm into positions that caused me pain so excruciating that I could not endure it for very long. On 12/30, she said I had not made much progress. On 12/7, she took measurements indicating that I had improved in elbow extension and bending; and I had noted increased dexterity in my hand/fingers. She also told me that I should not be feeling so much pain; and she didn't know why I was feeling it. (which made me very concerned as to my condition and her competence; I called my surgeon the next day; he sent a message back to me via his secretary that I shouldn't worry about it).

I found out, by questioning her on 12/30, that the elbow stiffens up about 6 weeks after the injury; which I wish I had known earlier, so I might have known to push for an earlier appointment, rather than settling for a 13-day break between my first and second P/T appointments.

Anyway, I have been doing my exercises religiously. So I was extremely disappointed yesterday on 1/9 to find that I am apparently doing worse than on the 7th. My P/T took measurements but refused to tell me what they indicated, though I asked her. She inflicted more pain; I tried to endure it, but could not, I begged her for a moment's release. I also asked her at one point to tell me how long she was going to press the elbow in that particular way, thinking if I knew how long, it might help me stand the pain. She refused. She mentioned that if I made no progress in two weeks, I couldn't come back; or maybe she said I was supposed to have two weeks of P/T, but if I made no progress I couldn't come back; I'm not sure; the thing that stood out was "no progress". The worst thing was that she was urging me to relax my arm or hand or both while applying extremely painful pressure; there was no way I could relax, I was struggling not to scream and was coming apart emotionally...She did do some less painful maneuvers at one point. But I don't think it helped. She was trying to get me to touch the back of my head with my left hand; and the most I could manage was a fingertip on the top of my neck for a couple of seconds.

At the end of the session on 1/9 (Friday), the P/T told me not to do any exercises before I saw her again (Tuesday 1/13); just to "move" the elbow, to throw a ball, try to touch my back with my left hand, and do a hand-turning exercise that she showed me so briefly that I barely remember it.

I have the feeling that the P/T doesn't know what to do with me. I'm wondering whether I should return to the exercises I was doing prior to my improvement on 1/7 - but if I do so, I will be contradicting her instructions. I have been faithfully throwing the ball and touching the back of my head, and generally trying to use the elbow (as I have been doing for weeks; just more consciously).

If anyone here has had P/T; especially for elbow injuries -
Is the Physical Therapist supposed to manipulate an injured limb so that it causes unbearable pain? I expected aches, discomfort, and some pain, but not pain so intense lasting several seconds or more than a minute.

Should I go with my gut feeling, defy the Physical therapist's instructions and continue some of the earlier assigned exercises between now and Tuesday 1/13 in addition to doing what she said?

Should I try to get a new P/T?

I am very disheartened; because I fear that my surgeon will recommend surgery after all, putting in screws and I hear that it's painful and the recovery is much longer. I don't seem to have made much progress in four weeks if my P/T's reaction on 1/9 was any indication.