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Right. And listening to alcoholics in recovery discuss their drinking history in AA meetings for the past 28 years... this man's behavior wasn't good sign at all.
so a craving is a bad sign in AA?
why do they look at a craving as evil?
If you have been a heavy drinker for a while a craving is normal.
If you have been a heavy drinker for a while a craving is normal.
It's not about what AA types label as "evil", it's about brain physiology. Cravings are normal, and you can either choose to feed them or fight them. Your brain will eventually rewire itself and the cravings will lessen *if you let it*. Continuing to feed them by drinking n/a beer and hanging out with drinking friends while your brain is trying to heal doesn't help, because it continues to reinforce the behaviors (or if you prefer, wiring) that are involved in going to the bottle to relieve whatever's triggering the craving. After fifteen years of sobriety, I still would find myself "I sure wish I could have a drink" when I was stressed out. At twenty years, the association of booze with stress relief went away. That's why the OP's boyfriend is setting himself up for relapse -- he's continually reinforcing the behavioral chain associated with triggers that lead to a relapse.
It's not about what AA types label as "evil", it's about brain physiology. Cravings are normal, and you can either choose to feed them or fight them. Your brain will eventually rewire itself and the cravings will lessen *if you let it*. Continuing to feed them by drinking n/a beer and hanging out with drinking friends while your brain is trying to heal doesn't help, because it continues to reinforce the behaviors (or if you prefer, wiring) that are involved in going to the bottle to relieve whatever's triggering the craving. After fifteen years of sobriety, I still would find myself "I sure wish I could have a drink" when I was stressed out. At twenty years, the association of booze with stress relief went away. That's why the OP's boyfriend is setting himself up for relapse -- he's continually reinforcing the behavioral chain associated with triggers that lead to a relapse.
Ya like i said it might not be a good idea to drink NA beer in recovery because of the psychological triggers it can have.
I would say going to a party with lots of alcohol early in recovery is not a good idea.
Ya like i said it might not be a good idea to drink NA beer in recovery because of the psychological triggers it can have.
Absolutely.
Quote:
I would say going to a party with lots of alcohol early in recovery is not a good idea.
What they suggest in AA is: arrive late and leave early, and make sure you have a way to get home if you start to feel uncomfortable, be sure you have a way to get home -- and call your sponsor. Which is great advice.
A big part of success in recovery is knowing yourself and monitoring your physical, mental, and emotional reactions to your current situation. What they call mindfulness these days.
A lot of strong opinions on this thread. I know a hardcore recovered alcoholic (sorry) who did drink NA beer at functions where others are drinking (such as at the bar). He never touched real booze again. I can't say its bad, because alcohol is something he decided to never get into again and that's it. Just my anecdote... BTW Heineken 0.0 is pretty tasty on a hot summer day. I drink NA beer in Europe when I'm traveling around.
A lot of strong opinions on this thread. I know a hardcore recovered alcoholic (sorry) who did drink NA beer at functions where others are drinking (such as at the bar). He never touched real booze again. I can't say its bad, because alcohol is something he decided to never get into again and that's it. Just my anecdote... BTW Heineken 0.0 is pretty tasty on a hot summer day. I drink NA beer in Europe when I'm traveling around.
Recovery's not a one size fits all thing. You can find people who smoke and drink every day for decades and live past a hundred. And you can find people who drink heavily for years and walk away from it without any outside help, and without relapsing. The facts are: most people will relapse in recovery (last stat I saw the average is seven times), and getting professional help and participating in a support program like AA both improve one's odds of staying alcohol free substantially. I went through outpatient treatment and went to AA meetings for about a year, and credit both with helping me remain alcohol free for 29 years. Some people may need to go to AA meetings for the support for a longer period, or for life. Some may find "working the steps" a useful task for learning to be more honest with themselves (I never worked the steps, but if they do the job for someone else, that's fine). That's the getting to know yourself part I wrote about.
There is no such things as a "recovered alcoholic" - once an alcoholic always an alcoholic. Some of us are just recovering. Non-alcoholic beer is discouraged as still has a tiny bit of alcohol in it. It is also a gateway to the real thing. You can't hang around a barber shop all the time and not expect to eventually get a haircut. And downing them they way you described is definitely addictive behavior.
I have a sugar addiction as well, I can't even have fake sugars without spiking my cravings for more.... Personally, I'd walk away from this one.
That's absolute nonsense. There is nothing about NA beer that makes you somehow fall off the wagon. I drank nothing but NA beer for years, and I still enjoy it a ton, because a lot of times I am working out later in the day and the last thing I want is alcoholic beer before a tough workout. I drink now again, thank god, because it's absolutely idiotic to give up alcohol forever for about 90% of people. Studies have shown many people at some time in their lives struggle with alcohol, but to give it up forever just means you're always going to want it, versus learning to control your intake and conquer your demons. I was always fine with alcohol for a decade plus, then I had a little patch in there where other factors made me lose control, I quit for health reasons and glad I did, and now I drink again and happy about that too. I've had no issues whatsoever in the years since I started drinking again because I was able to deal with the factors that were an issue before.
The BEST thing I did when not drinking was NA beer, because it really did make me not miss real beer much at all, since it has gotten so good now (Athletic Brewing makes such great beer that I'd rather drink most of their beer than alcoholic beer, since Athletic is just a superior brewery).
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