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I worked in the alcohol industry almost all my life. Was a daily drinker for about 38 years.
Quit nearly 10 years ago. No relapse. Wanted to quit for maybe 10 years before that. When I quit I had to detox and rehab. I was a serious case. 2 bottles (10 glasses) of good wine over six hours a day.
Before I quit I was scared about the thought of a day without alcohol. When I came out of 21 day rehab I was scared about relapsing. Within about 3 months I realised I had just gone several days without thinking about alcohol. I used that as a milestone of progress to build upon.
In the early days, just to please my counsellor, I went to lots of AA meetings. Today I do one meeting a week, on Zoom to keep my hand in. Can't ever take it for granted. It's a lot less time than I used to spend drinking.
I don't want to proselytise for AA here, because I too was sceptical, and still am to some degree. Sometimes the speakers and people sharing can be boring and repetitive, and say things you may disagree with.
You have to learn to sidestep that, and take what you need from the program.
They also use a lot of slogans and acronyms some of which are a bit cheesy Like GOD = Good Orderly Direction or Group of Drunks.
OTOH, "AA is not a program for those who need it, it's for those who want it"
gets to the heart of matter. You need to want it to make you a better person, not to save your marriage etc. Your marriage may be saved if you become a better person, but no guarantees.
You can use the links below to find your numbered Area Group. They will likely maintain an online list of groups and meetings in their local districts. The closest meeting to you may not be the best one for you.
You should visit several different groups/meetings to see which is the best for you.
I love the taste of wine. I used to drink a couple of glasses every night until recently. I fight the urge now. I found that wine disturbs my sleep. Yes, it makes me fall asleep quickly, but once it begins to wear off in my system I would wake up after about four hours and it took awhile to fall back asleep knowing my alarm was going off three more hours. It was a constant problem.
I went three weeks without my nightly wine. I broke that last night. To be honest, I did not enjoy my wine. Wine/sleep--I like my undisturbed sleep better than having wine at night.
No. There is refusal to partake or consent to. No matter, what the time between the dabs is.What you said, is excuse. Sorry. There is VERY significant reason not to partake AT ALL, but you will not believe it anyway, even if I spell it here.
So, according to your definition, anyone who has ever smoked weed is a drug addict...?
Everyone who eats, is food addicted?
Anyone who has a glass of wine or a beer now and then is an alcoholic??
That is one thing I still cannot understand...nicotine and the numerous other toxins in cigarettes...are TOXIC...how can these make you feel good, (at any time)?!!
Im also of the opinion that our bodies cannot 'get used to' regular toxins being ingested, I just dont think that is possible.
Alcohol is toxic too. Alcoholic beverages are classified as carcinogenic.
For the past 10 years I would drink to buzz almost every night not knowing it was not healthy. Then I cut back a few years ago to one drink a night. Then last year I cut back to only social drinking, but I still find it is a struggle every night to not drink anything! I feel so much healthier though. It seems like even one drink a night has negative health effects on me. Can anyone relate? Its kind of like I'm a light alcoholic or something. I've never felt the need to get drunk, but I struggle to give up a drink or two a night.
Giving up any habit is difficult, especially habits that are connected to social activities, in person or indirectly. I had similar experiences around food. Everywhere you go, everything you do -- there's yummy food. Same for drinking, and for some holdouts -- smoking.
For me though, things are easier to stop than to only reduce. It's easier to abstain than to just have a little.
Still, I know from my own experience it can be done. It has to happen in your mind first. Once you stop seeing yourself enjoying an indulgence, you can start seeing yourself enjoying more healthy pursuits. Maybe instead of having a drink to relax, get some exercise, listen to some music.
Or, if that doesn't work, visualize yourself continuing to drink until you are a sloppy drunk that no one wants to be around and you become a lonely desperate person.
I worked in the alcohol industry almost all my life. Was a daily drinker for about 38 years.
Quit nearly 10 years ago. No relapse. Wanted to quit for maybe 10 years before that. When I quit I had to detox and rehab. I was a serious case. 2 bottles (10 glasses) of good wine over six hours a day.
Before I quit I was scared about the thought of a day without alcohol. When I came out of 21 day rehab I was scared about relapsing. Within about 3 months I realised I had just gone several days without thinking about alcohol. I used that as a milestone of progress to build upon.
In the early days, just to please my counsellor, I went to lots of AA meetings. Today I do one meeting a week, on Zoom to keep my hand in. Can't ever take it for granted. It's a lot less time than I used to spend drinking.
I don't want to proselytise for AA here, because I too was sceptical, and still am to some degree. Sometimes the speakers and people sharing can be boring and repetitive, and say things you may disagree with.
You have to learn to sidestep that, and take what you need from the program.
They also use a lot of slogans and acronyms some of which are a bit cheesy Like GOD = Good Orderly Direction or Group of Drunks.
OTOH, "AA is not a program for those who need it, it's for those who want it"
gets to the heart of matter. You need to want it to make you a better person, not to save your marriage etc. Your marriage may be saved if you become a better person, but no guarantees.
You can use the links below to find your numbered Area Group. They will likely maintain an online list of groups and meetings in their local districts. The closest meeting to you may not be the best one for you.
You should visit several different groups/meetings to see which is the best for you.
What I've just done above is an AA 12th step. Not too difficult.
That said, if you feel AA is not right for you, I encourage anyone struggling to find some other program to help.
Thanks for the post! I'm in Oregon but I wanted to find an Agnostic group. I found a great one in Cleveland, Ohio that meets every day at 3 pm PST. I really enjoy the people in the group and get a lot of strength from them. I have an unofficial sponsor that lives across the street from me. Actually, I have three recovered alcoholics in close walking distance so I have people to talk to when I need it.
Another saying for god is "grace over drama". I like that one.
Details aside for the moment, I stopped drinking two weeks before the Doctor told me I was a Type II. Now, in that moment, I had filled the glass with ice and was looking at it, and decided in those moments of hesitation not to drink, to try to bring down my high blood pressure, so I wouldn't have to go on meds.
Well, in the two weeks after, I lost that battle and on that day, she put me on pills and alcohol interferes with the pills, so I couldn't drink.
And then, there is the Type II. Alcohol could blind me, cost me my limbs, it could kill me. All very good reasons why not to drink even though I miss the taste of wine and scotch, that TV suggests we should drink, that it was for decades the way I used to bring down the tension of the world. There is the very real death clause of why I don't go back.
Further, my house still has its wine cellars, still has its stocked bar. It is rather like SHADO's Commander Straker's office. In that story, he is a recovered alcoholic who has a complete bar in his office.
But in all fairness, scientifically proven not or yes, in my case, I would say that circumstances just fell the right way....at least for giving up alcohol.
You do realize that Type II diabetes is EXTREMELY common in the USA, though, and that many other people who have it drink in moderation, don't you? Not saying you SHOULD, but going blind and losing your limbs because you have a nightly glass of wine or a drink made with Scotch is being a little too overdramatic.
I have a friend who is 80 and was diagnosed as Type II over 25 years ago, and she drinks at least a glass of red wine most nights. Checks her blood sugar every morning. She also has COPD and a heart condition. She's a believer in moderation within her doctor's recommendations as to diet, and I've never seen her do the whole dramatic hand-to-the-back-of-her-forehead swooning bit over her garden-variety Type II diabetes.
My late father also had Type II. Had the occasional beer at the American Legion once a month.
Amusing story, though, since you mentioned loss of limbs. At 75 he caught a summer virus and had trouble breathing. Landed in the hospital, where he found out he had a heart condition, probably the same one that killed my grandfather in his fifties and that my younger brother would later find out he had at 51.
While my mother and sister and I were visiting him, along comes a smiling nurse who takes his temp and whatnot and then says, "now I'm just going to check your toes". We sat there smothering giggles in anticipation as she lifted the blanket only to find there were no toes, or feet, or ankles...
She asked my father if he lost his feet due to diabetes, and he said, "NO, that happened in 1945 in France about five miles from the German border."
Dad was no wuss. After what he'd been through at 23, diabetes didn't scare him at all.
You either drink, or you don’t drink. Alcoholism is regular alcohol consumption, no matter, how seldom that is and what’s the excuse to. You either drink, or you do not.
It is matter of principle, really. It is expressed consent to drink, not drinking itself. Trimming it down does not really change the principle. You got to stop, period, end of sentence. Takes about 7 years to sober completely and, even in my 18 sobriety years, it still calls ever so often. Just that that call is so faint now. Mostly silly dreams of still libating
Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleDolphin
Don't agree with this. Light social drinkers can go without drinking for long periods without any physical withdrawal symptoms. An alcoholic cannot.
Just like I can have a cigarette once or twice a year with a friend and not feel the need to go buy a pack.
There is addiction and there is "dabbling" without addiction.
Yeah, I agree with Little Dolphin. The bolded is simply not true. Lots of people drink occasionally or even almost every day but can just stop having any alcohol without any repercussions. An alcoholic can't.
I love the taste of wine. I used to drink a couple of glasses every night until recently. I fight the urge now. I found that wine disturbs my sleep. Yes, it makes me fall asleep quickly, but once it begins to wear off in my system I would wake up after about four hours and it took awhile to fall back asleep knowing my alarm was going off three more hours. It was a constant problem.
I went three weeks without my nightly wine. I broke that last night. To be honest, I did not enjoy my wine. Wine/sleep--I like my undisturbed sleep better than having wine at night.
I am in a similar boat (as I stated upthread). My desire for quality sleep over-ruled any remaining desire for alcohol that I had.
After I discovered edibles, that was the end of my sleep problems which existed with or without drinking.
I make my own "bars" (too lazy for cookies) and we eat one around 6 pm. This gives us a mild buzz for the evening and uninterrupted sleep. I SOOOO appreciate that!! After many years of insomnia. To me, it's miraculous. We don't smoke it.
We were regular drinkers but when DH got some stomach trouble we cut way down. We shop once a week or 10 days and will buy SOME but when it's gone, we go without until the next shopping trip. If it's not in the house, it's not available. We are 8 miles from the store without a car and nothing walkable.
Same way we handle not eating junk food. Just don't buy it.
But my solution to the desire for it, is to substitute another drink. Part of it, I discovered, is the habit of having something at hand to pick up and drink that is soothing in some way. For us, raw ginger tea seems to do the trick and helps DH's stomach. We love it, and I start sipping it at happy hour, and right until bed.
I will say, we like to sit out on our balcony regularly at happy hour (5:30---our sunset is 6:30 year round) to watch the sun set over the water, and somehow that isn't the same without alcohol. I'll sit out there, but DH only does when we have alcohol, lol.
So I get on my elliptical machine every day at 5:15 and that keeps my mind off missing happy hour. Or we take a walk at that exact time. Then when the edible kicks in, we don't even think about the booze, lol.
But I still enjoy drinking and life is too short to go without those "little" pleasures, if you can handle it. If it cuts off my longevity by a few years, that's just fine. I'd rather avoid the overly-elderly stage!
I've never had a hangover or any ill effects so it's hard to be motivated to quit, but I know too much is not helping the liver, so nice to know we can take it or leave it.
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