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Thanks all for the replies. The assisted living she is in is a very small facility, basically like a private home with maybe 3 or 4 other residents. I recently signed a POA for her, but in reading through it, did not really cover this, only issues where she would be on life support, etc. She is competent enough to make her own decisions, her main issue is she seems to be really forgetful and also has poor comprehension.
It does complicate matters that she is in Wisconsin (where she has lived for decades) and I am in Florida, so it is much more difficult to know what is going on there. She seems to really like everyone there save for the one woman who forced her into taking the shot. I guess I am just trying to find out if the caregiver was within her rights to do this. She has had a couple of other unpleasant encounters with this same woman according to sis.
Oh well, I love my sister and just get concerned for her. It's not really even so much about the shot, but more about whether there is someone there actually on a "power trip." I hesitate to say or do anything because prior to her moving there, she was really in a bad way trying to live on her own, not going to go into detail, but she was not coping by herself, financially, physically and otherwise. In this environment she seems to be safe and at least looked after. Guess I was just really wondering how much control they have over the residents. I don't think there are any nurses, maybe just nurse asssitants/caregivers.
My husband's brother has spent much of his adult life in a facility like you describe. His younger sister, late in life, came to work in a similar facility, but like you and yours, we are all worlds apart. So I share the concern for the patient and I hear my sister in law's concern for her safety working in a facility where people are allowed to make their own decision about being vaccinated or not. I believe in the vaccine, and definitely feel the workers should have it and the patients having it seems fair. If my relative asked me, or the staff asked me, I would say stick him. So I guess I'm saying bullied or not, I'd rather have them vaccinated.
The problem is that you really don't get clear news playing long distance telephone. Brother in law was refusing surgery last month because they "want to take my stomach out." Hardly; the doctor spoke to my husband at length about gallstones and inflammation and blockage and infection so he could explain it to his brother. Everything ended up fine.
However, PoA should extend to the vaccine and not just life saving stuff. A bad memory and confusion doesn't add up to someone who can make right decisions reliably. It's why you get PoA, to make decisions. In this case, your sister may have allowed herself to be bullied or might just have felt that way. But in either case, if you have PoA, they should have called you first.
However, PoA should extend to the vaccine and not just life saving stuff. A bad memory and confusion doesn't add up to someone who can make right decisions reliably. It's why you get PoA, to make decisions. In this case, your sister may have allowed herself to be bullied or might just have felt that way. But in either case, if you have PoA, they should have called you first.
Thank you. That is what I was thinking. I wish they would have at least run it by me first. I guess a big question is "why now." She has been there since summer, and even recently had surgery and it wasn't required then. But as you and others have pointed out (and it's true) she often is somewhat confused about what is happening and can easily misconstrue others motivations.
At this point I am letting it go, if other issues of this type come up in the future, however, I think I will just have to call them and find out what is what.
Thank you. That is what I was thinking. I wish they would have at least run it by me first. I guess a big question is "why now." She has been there since summer, and even recently had surgery and it wasn't required then. But as you and others have pointed out (and it's true) she often is somewhat confused about what is happening and can easily misconstrue others motivations.
At this point I am letting it go, if other issues of this type come up in the future, however, I think I will just have to call them and find out what is what.
Yes, keeping in touch is best. No matter how confused she is, if you know the level of it, you can factor it in. Also, asking the staff some questions now and again reminds them you exist and are keeping an eye on things.
Also, if someone helped you with the PoA, you can certainly ask them what it should cover. Some are very specific to certain things, so you should know and adjust it if you think it's necessary.
Thank you. That is what I was thinking. I wish they would have at least run it by me first. I guess a big question is "why now." She has been there since summer, and even recently had surgery and it wasn't required then. But as you and others have pointed out (and it's true) she often is somewhat confused about what is happening and can easily misconstrue others motivations.
At this point I am letting it go, if other issues of this type come up in the future, however, I think I will just have to call them and find out what is what.
My 96 year old mother is in a nursing home and her 90 something roommate was instructed by her anti-vax children to not get the vaccination back in January when it became available to them. The staff were not required to vaccinate back then. She contracted Covid a few months after refusing the shot and died. Thank God my mother is level-headed and got her shots as soon as available.
FYI, according to OP, sister is in ASSISTED LIVING, not in SNF - skilled nursing facility. So please, do not call it nursing home, it is quite different. ALF is subcontractor to Medicare, paid by Medicare, to provide assistance with residents daily needs. There is no nurse or case worker. Nurses and doctors are requested by facility owner as needed or, resident is, normally, driven to appointment by either facility staff or Medicare provided transportation service. Hopelink, for example. Residents in ALF are considered independent living with some assistance. Residents, that require more extensive support and health care, reside in long term SNF stay, where they have medical personnel and social services on site. Doctors there are normally attending only.
OP, damage is done. Vaccination is one way road, you can not rid of it. But what you can do is to contact ALF owner and strictly request to be contacted for permission, in the future, as next of kin and POA holder. Or, you will report them to Medicare and they will lose their license = end of payments, end of business.
ALFs are like mushrooms after rain, I am not sure, why you are so exalted that she "found a place". There are many more available with some effort and such things have to be discussed ahead of time.
A relative of mine ( patient in a nursing home ) made a deal to get the jab in return for some order out fast food.
Yes, I do believe coercion is used in administering anything and there is nothing one can do if the patient is of sound
mind and body...........
The OP specifies in the very first line that the patient has MENTAL and physical difficulties.
So no, she's not of sound mind and body. That's WHY she's in an assisted living facility - because she's not able to live fully independently.
I don't know what her mental disabilities are, but I do know with early dementia patients, sometimes you have to trick them to do what's right for them. Such as telling them the healthy soup they're about to eat secretly has chocolate in the noodles. They won't taste them, but they're there all right! Just to get them to eat something healthy instead of chocolate all day. It's an actual thing, and it's effective.
Thank you. That is what I was thinking. I wish they would have at least run it by me first. I guess a big question is "why now." She has been there since summer, and even recently had surgery and it wasn't required then. But as you and others have pointed out (and it's true) she often is somewhat confused about what is happening and can easily misconstrue others motivations.
At this point I am letting it go, if other issues of this type come up in the future, however, I think I will just have to call them and find out what is what.
I would call them to find out their side of the story. I believe there are 3 sides to every story, each person's side plus one in the middle that is the truth. At least asking them will give you their version which may not help but it may help you figure out what is closer to the truth another time.
They should have gone contacted you to decide but they didn't because they want everyone vaccinated. You need to assert that you're the one with the POA or they could continue to ignore it.
What if she had a true medical emergency where life saving or ending decisions had to be made but they did not call you to make that decision? Your sister may want nothing done to save her life where they would do everything they could to prolong it which in turn ended up fracturing your sisters ribs or she's now on life support? They also may choose to do nothing, thinking that they would not stop the inevitable, which IMO is a very important decision for you to make
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