Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Lately I'm finding that Im dwelling alot on things of the past (not far past, but recently like up to about 6 months or so) and am always bringing it up in my mind about how I should have done this OR that...And its like, well back then I didnt know how things would have turned out. Even things I planned out carefully sometimes dont go as well and I just be like, "why did I do that, I should of stuck with doing etc etc." And I just feel hard on myself but at the same time regret it.
For example, last month I was to take an extended-month stay with a former-roommate and do school and work while I was there, plus I had a savings. In the end it ended up being a 2 week vacation, lots of setbacks, had 3 people change our agreed plans (1 of who I had I formally worked for, decided not to hire me when I arrived) and had lost a significant amount of money.
Now its the main subject that crosses my mind alot because I keep thinking I should have put the money into something else, that I shouldnt of relied on those people, and that I shouldnt of even took the trip at all. Its a lesson learned but regardless Im suffering the consequences of every day now.
How do I just get over past mistakes and not dwell on it?
I sometimes have this problem with past relationships. I will replay over and over everything I have done wrong until I make myself crazy.
I sometimes do it in other areas of my life too.
Like if I am saving. If I happen to buy anything that I don't really need while I am saving, I can have serious buyers remorse. This will last for a day or longer depending on what it is (or how much I have spent)..
I think for myself, I have fallen into this "regret" type of place at this point of my life because I am aging. I am not so young anymore and I realize that I don't have the same opportunities as I once had. It makes you wish you would have done many things differently. I wish I could say like some that I never lose sleep, but unfortunately for me, I have lost a lot of sleep over mistakes in life, career and most of all failed relationships.
It's funny. Everyone in my life says that I am way to hard on myself. I suppose their right. I know they are right. It's kind of odd, because for someone like myself who is constantly at odds with how I am behaving, living, treating others etc. I am so forgiving with others. I can explain away anybody elses mistake, imperfections, or wrongdoings. Yet, I find it so hard to forgive myself..
The ups and downs of life really. Happens anytime you are dealing with humans. Best thing is to just put it down as a lesson in life and move on. Dwelling in the past and past occurances is a waste of time.
I learned a long time ago, a bird in the hand beats a bird in the bush..ANYDAY! (Old saying)
I also learned NOT to depend on other people, they will let you down.. Depend on yourself and you won't let yourself down.
Also, Even the best laid plans go bad, that's just part of life.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
