Here's my take on the issue, which led to our flooring decisions last year. Some of thoughts might apply to your situaiton.
The bottom line for us was to balance looks with function. If function took precedence, the house could have ended up with an industrial look like the inside of a warehouse. If looks took precedence, we could end up with choices that would go to heck after a few years due to their inability to stand up to wear and tear.
What we have is a tuscan style home with a very open floorplan. For example, the kitchen is open to the great room and the nook is open to the kitchen.
I was concerned that running the same flooring throughout the entire area would blend things together too much. Flooring is something that can be used to define the function of spaces, especially in an open floorplan, so that became a consideration.
Flooring is also something that can direct traffic. That was another consideration that we put into play when deciding what we wanted and where it was to be placed.
Then, I abide by the rule that wood and water don't mix. I didn't want wood in any wet areas, such as a kitchen. Even if I could justify the great looks of wood in such an area, I know that the maintenance would be significantly increased and the chances that it would require premature replacement/repair would be assured. For example, haven't we all seen the results of a dishwasher overflow or a leaky sink drain? Even if the chances were slim that it would happen anywhere in the near future, I didn't want to take the chance that it would happen and require me to spend more money fixing the flooring choice.
In the end, what did I do? I decided to go with natural materials throughout the house. Nowhere was carpet or ceramic tile a consideration, so it all came down to natural stone and wood.
We ended up selecting a rustic-look travertine, not the formal wire cut version, and installing it in the kitchen and nook. It tied the common functions of those areas together.
Then, we continued it out from the kitchena little into an area that provided access out the rear door. It sort of created a wide area between the kitchen and the great room where people could gather without being concerned of dropping food or drinks onto a less durable surface. It also gave an area that would be unaffected by any snow/slush/dirt being tracked in from the back yard.
The great room was floored in a hand scraped wood. It matched up well with the multi-colored, earth-toned, travertine. However, there was enough of a color variation and texture difference that it helped define the space.
What this did was keep the entire area in natural materials and in colors that complemented each other, but kept the durable materials in the heavy traffic/potentially dirtier areas. The less durable wood was placed in a more intimate area that did not have a heavy traffic pattern.
The hallways and baths were also tiled in the same natural travertine. Again, they were the traffic areas that dictated a more durable flooring choice, or were located in the wet areas. They would be unaffected by any spilled water, toilet overflows, or broken pipes.
Finally the bedrooms were floored in the same hand-scraped wood found in the great room. It provided a continuity in the home, without introducing a third choice, and again provided a "warmer" and traditional look in the more intimate areas.
I think it worked out very well. For the past eight months, we haven't found any regrets.
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I am afraid of hardwood getting ruined in the kitchen - but all the home builders here are showing hardwood THROUGHOUT the first floors. So I am afraid if we tile certain areas (kitchen, etc..) and were forced to sell for some reason - we would be limiting the buyer pool due to our Non-continuous flooring choice.
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BTW, you mentioned that the builders are showing hardwood throughout. I suggest that it's good to see the use of different materials in different ways, but just because they did it doesn't make it right for you. For example, can you remember some houses in the 80's being shown with wall-to-wall carpet throughout the bathrooms and surrounding the toilets?
Geeeze, IMO how could someone justify that? It's just a mold magent and I would hate to test the carept surrounding the toilet, especially if the male in the house likes to stand while they use the facility . . . just think of the late night splatter in the carpet. Yuck!!!
More recently, I walked through a model where not only the walls and ceiling were painted a muted green, but also all the floor trim, crown moulding, and window trim. There wasn't anything above the floor that wasn't the same green hue. I felt like I was inside of a pea.
So, just because a builder is showing something doesn't mean it's wise. It could just be the flavor of the day, a trendy thing to do for the moment, that will change later. It also doesn't mean it's right for you, or even wise at all, like the carpet around the toilet that was very common not that long ago. Such things can provide good ideas, but you need to decide if it's right for you.
Also, just think how many buyers would be turned off by worn or water damaged wood in the kitchen when you decided to sell. I have seen it first hand in different hosues throughout the years. The wood floors in the kitchen tend to wear out fastest in the work tirangle (sink, fridge, and stove), but especially in front of the sink. With all the time spent washing pots/pans/dishes, dripping greaseand soapwater on the floor, and generally preparing dinners in that area, the wood in front of the sink will show damage. You won't see that with a quailty hard surface.
ON EDIT: One final thought. We sold a house in SoCal last year. It had a mixture of hardwood and tile just like we've done in our current house. At no time whatsoever did anyone question its use or not buy the house because of it. At least it wasn't a reason given for not buying the home. Instead, it sold in less than 90 days in a slow market.
Of course it all depends on your area, but a mixture of tile and wood can be a benefit. It was for us.