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Ok , let's put this another way. if you are a non smoker would you let some one smoke in your house ? i am a non smoker and i don't let any one smoke in my house. so that probably makes people uncomfortable to. so for thoses of you that let people wear shoes in your house would let some smoke to right ? then just wash the walls and ceiling and shampo the carpets after they leave right? some one not respecting my house rules is the only thing im inforcing. im just talking about respecting your friends wishes. if they don't ,then they are not true friends. and i also have friends that smoke and they respect me enough not to smoke in my house.
Ok , let's put this another way. if you are a non smoker would you let some one smoke in your house ? i am a non smoker and i don't let any one smoke in my house. so that probably makes people uncomfortable to. so for thoses of you that let people wear shoes in your house would let some smoke to right ? then just wash the walls and ceiling and shampo the carpets after they leave right? some one not respecting my house rules is the only thing im inforcing. im just talking about respecting your friends wishes. if they don't ,then they are not true friends. and i also have friends that smoke and they respect me enough not to smoke in my house.
You can make any rules about your space that you wish to make! Same for your car! Same for your swimming pool, should you have one.
But as I stated earlier . . . be aware that people may be quite turned off to your rules, and never voice it, but rather decide to avoid coming to your home. Believe me, I have lived in a neighborhood where this was quite the issue . . . but I seriously doubt the homeowners who were soooo stringent about the "shoes off" rule had any clue how turned off others were. People just quit going to their home - would stand outside - would turn down invites unless it was an outdoor event - like a BBQ.
I don't have a problem w/ taking my shoes off and as I said - carry socks w/ me when going to someone's home. That is my way of compromising w/ it. But I will never go to someone's home again (unless necessary for business reasons) for a semi-formal dress up evening if I have to take off my nice pumps and put on a pair of socks w/ my dressy outfit. That is silly and if someone's carpet is that precious - they should be entertaining at their club or a restaurant. That is just how I feel - but I won't be voicing that in public, and I suspect many others will never say it to their host, either. They just will find an excuse not to come back.
You have to find a balance. What you ask of your family and friends may not be the same thing you ask of visitors or party guests.
Ok , let's put this another way. if you are a non smoker would you let some one smoke in your house ? i am a non smoker and i don't let any one smoke in my house. so that probably makes people uncomfortable to. so for thoses of you that let people wear shoes in your house would let some smoke to right ? then just wash the walls and ceiling and shampo the carpets after they leave right? some one not respecting my house rules is the only thing im inforcing. im just talking about respecting your friends wishes. if they don't ,then they are not true friends. and i also have friends that smoke and they respect me enough not to smoke in my house.
I am SO with you on this! I am a nonsmoker and I do not allow anyone to smoke in my house; it would be a "hanging offense"! For ME, both are health issues which I refuse to compromise on, nor should I be expected to do so in my own home. I recognize that many people don't consider shoes in the house to be a health issue, just like many don't consider secondhand smoke to be a health issue ... but I do.
A friend of mine will not serve any kind of alcohol in her home. Not drinks, not beer, not wine, period. It's not a religious issue but she does feel very strongly about it and her "house rule" is that there will be no drinking in her home, ever, by anyone. Period. I don't drink either, so it's no problem for me, but we both know people who believe that it is a host's "social obligation" to offer a drink and have criticized or made fun of her for not doing so. So she knows better than to invite those people to her home. If someone is offended by another person's house rules, then they're not worth an invitation anyway, IMO.
I thought it wrong. I thought that here in States visitors take off the shoes when visiting your house is unpolite. We Asian always take off shoes when come home/visit other's houses. So, it was easy for us don't have to ask. However, when I come to visit my co-worker who are white folks, I want to take off the shoes but I thought it isn't a nice thing to do so I ask them if they want me to take the shoes off. Most of the time thay say no need.
You can make any rules about your space that you wish to make! Same for your car! Same for your swimming pool, should you have one.
But as I stated earlier . . . be aware that people may be quite turned off to your rules, and never voice it, but rather decide to avoid coming to your home. Believe me, I have lived in a neighborhood where this was quite the issue . . . but I seriously doubt the homeowners who were soooo stringent about the "shoes off" rule had any clue how turned off others were. People just quit going to their home - would stand outside - would turn down invites unless it was an outdoor event - like a BBQ.
I don't have a problem w/ taking my shoes off and as I said - carry socks w/ me when going to someone's home. That is my way of compromising w/ it. But I will never go to someone's home again (unless necessary for business reasons) for a semi-formal dress up evening if I have to take off my nice pumps and put on a pair of socks w/ my dressy outfit. That is silly and if someone's carpet is that precious - they should be entertaining at their club or a restaurant. That is just how I feel - but I won't be voicing that in public, and I suspect many others will never say it to their host, either. They just will find an excuse not to come back.
You have to find a balance. What you ask of your family and friends may not be the same thing you ask of visitors or party guests.
Ditto!
We all can make up our own house rules. Just keep in mind that when you have a house rule that varies greatly from what is the norm in your area, some of your guests may be taken aback or surprised by your unusual request. In that instance, I think it's a good idea to warn people of your rule before they come to your home for the first time.
In the area where I live, it's highly unusual for people to tell others to remove their shoes. You can suggest it (as in "Feel free to kick your shoes off if you want"), but if a person were to demand that their guests remove their shoes, I think most people around here would feel very uncomfortable & would consider the host to be really pushy & controlling. Not a good way to kick off a party.
Interestingly enough, I have found that when people come to my house the first time, they tend to keep their shoes on. But as they relax & embrace the casual atmosphere of our home, the shoes come off.
I cannot imagine being invited to a formal or semi-formal event and being forced to remove my shoes. That's just ... weird.
I don't like second hand smoke either. These days, not many of my acquaintances use tobacco. But if they do, it is understood that they'll go out on the porch for a quick smoke. They just do it on their own--nobody lights up in anybody's house.
However, I do not equate dirty lungs with a dirty carpet.
You can always get that vacuum out later. You can't un-breathe tobacco.
As I said before, I often offer to take my shoes off(even though my feet are not the most attractive.)
And for family, we do have the shoes off at the door rule. Maybe this custom will become more and more popular, and eventually prevail, as it does in the Asian world.
I value my guests and friends more than my floor (my first floor is hardwood). If they offer to take it off, I say no need. Some do anyway, some don't. All of my kids' friends take their shoes off as soon as they make it past the door. On a rainy day, their shoes stay outside. I don't have a problem telling kids. I can always clean my floors later, and if anyone of my guests come in with an inch of dirt clinging to their shoes, I probably would follow the tracks with a mop. That's usually hint enough for them to either take them off or wipe their feet at the mats by the door. Anyone that clueless would get invited less and less in my house.
Location: Sometimes Maryland, sometimes NoVA. Depends on the day of the week
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Comparing hours rules on shoes to house rules on smoking or drinking is no where near a fair comparison. Unless you can show me research that proves me wearing shoes in the house leads to disease, its apples and oranges.
Comparing hours rules on shoes to house rules on smoking or drinking is no where near a fair comparison. Unless you can show me research that proves me wearing shoes in the house leads to disease, its apples and oranges.
Agreed completely!
There is nothing that will be tracked in from shoes that can kill you like smoking can, unless you are down there licking the carpet and ingesting highly poisonous substances that normally wouldn't be found on shoes anyway.
I'd guess that if no shoes because of germs is one's issue, that one also insists guests wash their hands and feet upon entering? Otherwise you've still got all those germs in your house.
If one is wanting merely to keep their carpet clean from normal wear and tear then I would guess they would also not allow any food or drink where there is carpet, they would have no pets, they would not allow brushing of hair over carpet and they would have a separate set of shoes for the outdoor play/activities, including for the pool area. All that in addition to daily dusting and vacuuming in order to keep it pristine.
Perhaps I should start requiring everyone entering my house to wear fully covering shoes so that their potential foot fungus cannot be transferred to my family? <tic>
Okay,
I have lurked this thread but not responded because the house i am in now... it is not an issue, carpet and house is old so who cares?
I will have this to add. While looking at new homes, I wanted to view a certain model but there was no decorated model at the community that I was interested in. However, there was a home just finished and ready to be closed in a few days.
The future owners had a light beige carpet (is there any other color for new build??)
The sales woman accompanied us to the home, we all wiped our feet on the mat provided and toured the house.
We went upstairs, family room, basement and then circled back around to the living room.
There was a muddy leaf stuck to the bottom of my shoe. You could see my muddy footprints ALL OVER THAT HOUSE!! I was mortified!!!
Of course I took off my shoes to complete the tour, and apologized profusely. I really believed that the sales lady would get in big trouble. she assured me there was no problem because the final cleaning hadn't occured.
Funny, she is no longer with the company ( 4 months later) and I thought it was because the builder was having financial trouble and laid off some people. The other sales lady assured me that was not the problem but I am now I am wondering if this was the reason.
so I think when I move into my new house I will have a no shoe rule during inclement weather.
I am also looking into plastic runners because I am convinced my daughter coming in through the front door will track mud throughout house.
There is no closet near the front door. The closet is near the garage door entrance door. But my garage will not have service door. Not sure what to do about that... Front door and leave shoes at teh door, or provide an opener to an 8 year old so that she can come in through the garage.
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Unless you can show me research that proves me wearing shoes in the house leads to disease, its apples and oranges.
There was a muddy leaf stuck to the bottom of my shoe. You could see my muddy footprints ALL OVER THAT HOUSE!! I was mortified!!!
