Houston-related etiquette question (San Diego, Post: elementary school, living in, title)

[Sampaguita]

Originally Posted by karuna95

Agree with Oildog. When my son was in preschool,

• preschool teachers were Mrs. (first name)
• Family friends were Mrs. (first name)
• Strangers and new acquaintances were Mrs. (last name)
• Aunts/uncles and other relatives are Aunt/Uncle (first name)

When he started kindergarten, the only change was that teachers became Mrs. (last name).

All of our friends' kids, and my son's friends, call me Mrs. (some call me by my last name, some by first name). But there is always a title.

Was that something the children automatically did or were you asked by their parents or by the children themselves (which would seem unlikely)? Did you need to tell the children how to address you?

[elnina]

Between the ages of 2 and 5, your preschool child is most receptive to learning the rules of polite conduct. In other words they want to do anything you ask. Grab the opportunity to teach appropriate behavior.
Said that I would not try confuse my kids teaching appropriate behavior by the region. You might be moving to another part of country where other regional etiquette will rule.
I would teach them rules that apply everywhere. Polite, well mannered kids will grow into polite, well mannered adults. The rules are pretty much the same in US as in Europe, and in the most other civilized countries.
You could check some online resources:
Manners and Etuquette for Kids - Online Resources
Kids etiquette guides, teach good manners, respect, polite children
Manners and Etiquette for Children

[EasilyAmused]

Depends on the family.

Our family it's always Ms. or Mr. First name of very close family friends until the child is about 5. Always Mr. and Ms. Surname with authority figures or adults outside the social group. After the child grows up a little it's always Mr. and Ms. Last Name for close friends as well.

I find it really rude when kids address adults by there first name as they get older, but that's just me.

[jfre81]

There are some very Houstonian ways to address strangers when driving on the freeway, but the swear filter will block most of them.

[EasilyAmused]

Originally Posted by jfre81

There are some very Houstonian ways to address strangers when driving on the freeway, but the swear filter will block most of them.

LMAO. This is so true. My favorite term of endearment is, Ms. "Get off your phone and drive, B***h."

[Sampaguita]

Originally Posted by elnina

Between the ages of 2 and 5, your preschool child is most receptive to learning the rules of polite conduct. In other words they want to do anything you ask. Grab the opportunity to teach appropriate behavior.
Said that I would not try confuse my kids teaching appropriate behavior by the region. You might be moving to another part of country where other regional etiquette will rule.
I would teach them rules that apply everywhere. Polite, well mannered kids will grow into polite, well mannered adults. The rules are pretty much the same in US as in Europe, and in the most other civilized countries.
You could check some online resources:
Manners and Etuquette for Kids - Online Resources
Kids etiquette guides, teach good manners, respect, polite children
Manners and Etiquette for Children

What's interesting is that I posed a similar question on one of my mom boards and a British-raised mom said she is still having a hard time getting used to children addressing others as "Miss/Mr 1st Name" because it's considered rude to use an adult's first name.

Also, she refrains from using and cringes every time she hears "m'am" - in England it holds unpleasant class connotations and is only used in reference to the Queen.

Thanks for the links. It is fascinating in a strange way that many Americans are unaware of good manners. It's good that there are guides out there for people who need or want to instill those good manners in their own children even though they may not have been raised with that awareness.

I was genuinely curious to know if Houstonians had an established culture of niceties and if so, wanted to incorporate that into my children's lives.

As I mentioned previously, in California we came across so many families where the children treated adults as their peers and that really irritated us.

[Sampaguita]

Originally Posted by jfre81

There are some very Houstonian ways to address strangers when driving on the freeway, but the swear filter will block most of them.

Every time I do that (which, sadly, is too often), my husband feels he needs to pipe up with "He/she can't hear you".

[houston-nomad]

Originally Posted by EasilyAmused

Depends on the family.

Our family it's always Ms. or Mr. First name of very close family friends until the child is about 5. Always Mr. and Ms. Surname with authority figures or adults outside the social group. After the child grows up a little it's always Mr. and Ms. Last Name for close friends as well.

I find it really rude when kids address adults by there first name as they get older, but that's just me.

Some adults may prefer it, though. Personally I don't want to be called mrs./mr. last name, because I'm always Dr. LastName, and it sounds disrespectful to me to use mrs./mr. I simply never hear it and I don't like it. But I wouldn't expect a child to refer to me as Dr. LastName, so I prefer they use my first name.

[EasilyAmused]

Originally Posted by houston-nomad

Some adults may prefer it, though. Personally I don't want to be called mrs./mr. last name, because I'm always Dr. LastName, and it sounds disrespectful to me to use mrs./mr.

Well, some of us require Dr. if it applies. But you're really that sensitive about having your title of education announced/addressed?

[TommyGazelle]

Originally Posted by Sampaguita

Well, I think it's Houston-related anyway. In California, it seemed that all children called any & all adults by first name unless parents taught them differently. Growing up in NY, all the families I knew taught their children to address adults as Mr/Mrs Last Name. Using Mr/Mrs First Name would have been inappropriate then.

Here, I've noticed that most people up until college graduates address me as Miss First Name.

We're working on good manners with our 2 yr olds right now and have been teaching them to address adults by Mr/Miss/Mrs or by the appropriate aunt/uncle titles.

We are not sure what our children should be addressing college kids. It just dawned on me that if said college kids were teaching our children to swim, I'd have them call the instructors Miss/Mr but what if they are just casual acquaintances?

Is there are norm in Houston? Or is it a cultural and/or family preference?

This was so common for me growing up. As a matter of fact I still address people like this...lol. I don't mean any disrespect or a lack of etiquette...
Old habits.