gay friendly rock falls sterling dixon? (to live in, move, suburbs)

[segue]

Originally Posted by decidingwheretolive

I have lived in Sterling/Rock Falls my entire life (almost 35). I know several gay women, not many gay men. There are a few gay men, who everyone knows they are gay, but they don't ever say anything about it. I personally wouldn't live here if I were gay. I have never heard of any hate crimes or anything, but there are certainly plenty of ignorant people here. I am planning to move out of the area. I don't know about churches, I haven't found a church here I'm comfortable with, they all seem too conservative.

Thanks for your reply. You (along with others) are making me step back and consider this move more seriously.

[Rebel74]

I live in Rock Falls and according to this you are looking for employment in the nursing industry. The only hospital worth a damn is KSB in Dixon. We have one here in Sterling but CGH is not the greatest of hospitals, they have been cutting back on personnel. Look into Kathern Shaw Bethea (KSB) they might be hiring. If you really want a job you might look at the Quad Cities which is on the border of Illinois and Iowa. As far as a the gay thing as long as you are not a "flaming homosexual" and try to push it on everyone you will do just fine here. Yes this area is full of Rednecks and I am one of them but as long as you try to get along with us we will do the same.

[Mathguy]

I grew up in the area.

Frankly, even 20 years ago there were people in town everyone *knew* were gay...I never once heard of a gay-bashing. I think since then people have grown less conservative with regards to stuff like this. I think the 3 guys in the park was your imagination.

One problem you might face is that it's a small town area and people tend to already have social groups, extended family etc. and it can be hard to develop friendships, it takes time.

Best of luck with your decision.

[segue]

Originally Posted by Mathguy

I grew up in the area.

Frankly, even 20 years ago there were people in town everyone *knew* were gay...I never once heard of a gay-bashing. I think since then people have grown less conservative with regards to stuff like this. I think the 3 guys in the park was your imagination.

One problem you might face is that it's a small town area and people tend to already have social groups, extended family etc. and it can be hard to develop friendships, it takes time.

Best of luck with your decision.

Thanks for your response. It's conveinent to think the 3 guys in the park was my "imagination", however, "experience" has taught me differently.

[Mathguy]

Originally Posted by segue

Thanks for your response. It's conveinent to think the 3 guys in the park was my "imagination", however, "experience" has taught me differently.

Most every guy I know has been hassled by a group of guys at some time in their life and it doesn't sound like they even did anything but you felt "uncomfortable".

Perhaps I'm just a little defensive about people looking at small towns and thinking they are full of brutal stupid people in the middle of fly-over country.

You are probably more at risk of getting gay bashed in a metro area...like the two brothers that got beat up in NY last week or so.

[oldengineer]

I am sure that you made your decision to relocate long ago- wish I would have seen your post back then.

Your encounter in the park actually reminded me of something that happened to me back in the eighties in Sterling. I was going to a job interview in a tie and sport jacket when this scruffy looking hippy/mental case type started screaming threats and insults at me out of nowhere. It had nothing to do with being gay- if anything it was a class thing- that is a very blue collar town.

That being said, I grew up in that area and found it to be hyper-homophobic. I'm not exagerating here. If you were even suspected of being gay you could expect alot of verbal abuse and problems finding employment. The gossip in the area was widespread and poisonous. I can't believe that it has changed that much over the years- that sort of dysfunction is passed down through families and generations.

I notice that in the responses to your post that you have one guy telling you that you will "get along" as long as you stay in the closet. Another appears to be telling you that you will be tolerated as long as you suppress your tendency to molest children. That should tell quite alot about the mindset in that area....

This is not an area for anyone to relocate to- the economy has been in decline or stagnate since the 70's. Everyone that I went to school with in the area that had anything on the ball got out long ago. A much better bet would be Rockford, about 40 miles to the North. It has a thriving gay community and ready access to Chicago. There are also three major hospitals there, as well as a branch of the University of Chicago Medical School.

Hope that things worked out for you

[Dani917]

I moved to Dixon about 5 years ago. It is a nice little town-emphasis on little. Please note that I am a married, white female that attends a mainline denomination church so I have no experience being "outside the norm" in Dixon. Here is my opinion for what it may be worth.

I lived in the D.C. area prior to moving to Dixon so I can relate to relocating there from a larger, more varied metro area. In general it can be hard for anyone moving there to fit in and find a social circle because nearly everyone who lives there has always lived there (sometimes several generations back for most families) so they already have their cliques. That being said, it can be done it just takes time and effort.

As for being gay in our community I do know gay men who live here openly as a couple and I believe they are well accepted for the most part. There have been incidents of bigotry, but I'm almost sure you will run into that in some form just about anywhere. Most people do feel the need to whisper the word "gay" when describing someone as if saying the word out loud might be offensive to that person. I've never seen it as mean-spirited, just a community learning to adapt to a newfound diversity. Very much still a small farm town. My husband is a law enforcement officer and I don't ever recall him encountering a hate crime towards gays. Not sure that would be the case in Sterling or Rock Falls.

Rockford or Davenport would be your nearest option for socializing in a bigger city, but people in Dixon get used to having to drive an hour for *everything* including most chain restaurants, a mall, or most entertainment. Dixon does a very nice job of having some fun local events (Cinco de Mayo, Thai festival, etc.) but all major theater, ethnic celebrations, concerts, and so forth will be a drive. If you come here knowing that and don't mind it's no big deal to make a trip "to town" on the weekend. Honestly the low cost of living makes up for having to budget a little more for gas money.

Wish you the best of luck on your decision and your move.

[sleepingjewel]

okay so to start off...yes as others have said the area is "in the middle of nowhere" and it is a decent drive to the nearest major city. Also, you will encounter your red necks and other less than intellectual stereo-types that will be abrasive and judgemental. In my opinion you will have that anywhere you live. However, if you are looking for a getaway with a large amount of recreational activities [for me that even includes just going to the canal and enjoying the quiet and watching nature] it is a laid back place. I would recommend Dixon if you are worried about the diving right in to small town living. Many people that live here complain that there is nothing to do and blah blah blah, but I personally can't go a day without something to do. I guess it depends on your motivation level. I'll just get up and go do something. If I want to go to the mall, I drive to the cities. I don't see the big deal. The people that whine that life sucks and the town sucks.....no one is stopping you from moving. see ya. bye. There's hundreds of things to do here if you even remotely like the outdoors. I live in Rock Falls so I don't know about Dixon, BUT get off your butt and do something. ride atv, dirtbikes, snow mobile in the winter, horseback riding, boating, fishing, hiking, biking, swimming, those ski do things haha, canoeing. I can't even think... w.e you get the idea. As far as culturally there's sticklers in every bunch. who cares. they're clearly uneducated. feel bad for their misfortune and move on. I love living in the country I moved here from chicago and when i spend the weekend with family I CAN'T WAIT to go HOME! On another note i volunteer at the local haunted house and there was a gay or bi {i dont know for sure because it is irrelevant to me} neways this kid working with us was getting picked on by the red necks and they got their butts chewed by me n the owner. more people out here believe it far worse to be a rude bully than to be gay. lol it sounds funny but it's true. My fiance totally against gayness but we have gay bi and metro (=]) friends. I think hes most afraid that a gay person would hit on him or something, but that doesnt make him judge their character or treat them poorly. just more cautious. it's really quite funny actually until he gets used to the fact that they are not attracted to him lmao.

anyways please make your own decision knowing that dixon is more city and sterling is in-between and rock falls is a blurp that is mostly rural. it is a wonderful place to live for the right people. their will always be idiots, but i'll be your friend =]!! but don't come expecting a well gay adapted community. like there are no gay bars. But I have faith that you will find good true friends that would enrich your life. Jobs are hard to find but start applying now. pick for yourself. Have fun you only have one life. if it takes a few weeks to find a friend to actually hang out with, then enjoy the fact that peace can actually be found out here. Lastly, thank you for enjoying my rant, and yes sterling and Rock Falls could be considered run down but in my opinion so is every other city. there's just no extravagant sky scrapers to draw your attention away. hope i have helped any other questions just post um on here ill keep an eye out for them.

peace and love,
Jewel

[linicx]

The original post was written in 2008. A meaninglul update to social issues is always welcome.

[Bluw]

I'm a lesbian that has lived a little farther north in a small town, on the outskirts. For the most part, the worst I have dealt with is dirty looks and stupid comments. I work in a small town where a co-worker threatened my life, I basicly made it clear I was here to stay. Nothing more than verbal confrontations in the last ten years. They have slowly died off and it seems I am respected by others since then.
I did have a few close calls at night in gas station lots. I now attempt to only stop at populated stations and well lit. The worst case I had was about three drunks coming home from hunting and the only other person in the station was a very scared clerk. Luckily one of them decided it was too risky because of security cameras. He managed to stop his buddies and they left.
Just remember that it doesn't matter what race, color or how you identify, someone out there hates you. I have seen a quiet well dressed straight couple beat down just because they could afford a nice car. As long as common sense is used, it's rarely a big issue.