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Old 01-11-2018, 04:52 PM
 
27,981 posts, read 30,487,031 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Bishop View Post
^^^^
I like the way he/she/it said that. Very well said, thank you I don't think people should be discriminated against for being homosexual or for any reason. Its just that most people don't want some random person's sexuality shoved in their faces. When some man comes up and starts a conversation out of the blue about his 'husband', or some woman wants to let me know about her 'wife' I make no comment and just walk away. Please, spare us and let us live our own lives.
Perfect illustration of the double standard I was just talking about in my previous post.

Would you feel the same way if a heterosexual person talked to you about their husband or wife?
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Old 01-12-2018, 08:02 AM
 
735 posts, read 504,684 times
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We don't have Hetersexual Pride parades. We don't go around being defined by our sexuality. If some strange person came up and started talking to me about my husband I would move off too. Its about minding your own business. Gay people would do better to be discrete and mind their own business. Most people really don't want to hear about who they sleep with.
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Old 01-12-2018, 10:25 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
28,007 posts, read 26,685,008 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nmnita View Post
I am sure if you take time to think about it, you will understand what a gay friendly city means? There are places in our country as most know that are more accepting of alternative life styles. This goes for states as well. We all know gays are more accepted in say, SF or Portland than say Huntsville, Al or even parts of NWA. This doesn't mean one will not run into people who are not accepting regardless of the city, or that the most conservative, bible belt city will all try and chase a gay person away, but there are many cities that are more accepting. They are gay friendly cities. That shouldn't be too hard to understand. Wouldn't you agree?
Philadelphia. They have a community center with social groups, networking events, cultural events, and there's a gayborhood. You can go out on a date with your sweetheart and hold his hand--without being stoned by an angry mob.
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Old 01-12-2018, 10:40 AM
 
1,649 posts, read 2,361,502 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Bishop View Post
We don't have Hetersexual Pride parades. We don't go around being defined by our sexuality. If some strange person came up and started talking to me about my husband I would move off too. Its about minding your own business. Gay people would do better to be discrete and mind their own business. Most people really don't want to hear about who they sleep with.

I haven't researched the history of gay parades etc, but I would guess it has something to do with a long history of gays being persecuted by many heterosexual groups (ex: Christians). Even VP Mike Pence is anti-gay and promotes conversion therapy. Congressman Steve King of Iowa also. Why is it any of their business what goes on in America's bedrooms?

Last edited by smpliving; 01-12-2018 at 10:55 AM..
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Old 01-17-2018, 11:47 AM
 
11,288 posts, read 23,250,541 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Bishop View Post
We don't have Hetersexual Pride parades. We don't go around being defined by our sexuality. If some strange person came up and started talking to me about my husband I would move off too. Its about minding your own business. Gay people would do better to be discrete and mind their own business. Most people really don't want to hear about who they sleep with.
Gay people don't walk around being defined about their sexuality any more than straight people walk around being defined by their sexuality, except of course that many times straight people define gay people not based on the fact they're people like everyone else, but they define them because of their sexuality and that's how they see them. The GAY person. Gay people had always lived in the shadows and had to be discrete about simple things like their husband or wife or who they're dating - as you're alluding to in your posts. If I'm a guy talking about my husband do you just see me as talking about "who I'm sleeping with" or do you see it as a person talking about their spouse much like any married person would talk about their life.

Quote:
When some man comes up and starts a conversation out of the blue about his 'husband', or some woman wants to let me know about her 'wife' I make no comment and just walk away. Please, spare us and let us live our own lives.
I think this is a perfect example. Some person is talking about their husband or wife and you don't feel comfortable and just walk away. Would it be the same reaction if a guy walked up and started talking about his wife or some woman was mentioning her husband? Because I'm pretty sure I've been in that situation many times before and while I may not feel like chatting and don't care - I don't sit there and dwell on the fact the guy is married to a woman or the woman is married to a man. That isn't someone shoving sexuality in your face or talking about who they're sleeping with, they're doing what everyone does and is free to do - just talking about their spouse.

Are gay people not supposed to talk about who they're married to, yet straight people can? It shouldn't be a huge deal if you don't make it a huge deal.

Most of the time I don't see gay people throwing their sexuality in people's face or constantly bringing it up - I just see gay people having the same life conversations as everyone else but many straight people can't handle it and can only focus on the sexuality and that it's a GAY PERSON. It's not John from down the street, it's the gay guy from down the street. It's not some server at the restaurant, it's the gay guy who served me food. It's not the couple with the red house down the street, it's the lesbians down the street.

It's hard to just be normal when people refuse to think of you as just another person living their lives.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:38 PM
 
27,981 posts, read 30,487,031 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Bishop View Post
We don't have Hetersexual Pride parades. We don't go around being defined by our sexuality.
There's an easy explanation for that. If heterosexuality is the presumed norm, then heterosexual people aren't shamed for being heterosexual. You don't need to correct people's assumptions about you if their assumptions are correct. But gay people are often in the position of being shamed for doing things that heterosexual people take for granted. That's what pride parades are about. Now, I am the first person to admit gays are much more accepted now and so they are becoming somewhat annoying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Bishop View Post
If some strange person came up and started talking to me about my husband I would move off too.
Well, I think it would depend on the context. It's not like gay people are out there blabbing about their spouses to random people. Sure, there are people of either sexual orientation who do weird stuff. But you're implying gay people do this as some sort of social statement. I have no doubt that there are a few who do this; but to imply it's the norm is inaccurate.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Nurse Bishop View Post
Its about minding your own business. Gay people would do better to be discrete and mind their own business. Most people really don't want to hear about who they sleep with.
^^There's that double standard rearing its ugly head. "Minding your own business" and "discrete" are often code for "keep it a complete secret". Straight people don't have to do that. Gay people shouldn't either.
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Old 02-12-2018, 05:43 PM
 
27,981 posts, read 30,487,031 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chicago60614 View Post
Most of the time I don't see gay people throwing their sexuality in people's face or constantly bringing it up - I just see gay people having the same life conversations as everyone else, but many straight people can't handle it and can only focus on the sexuality and that it's a GAY PERSON. It's not John from down the street, it's the gay guy from down the street. It's not some server at the restaurant, it's the gay guy who served me food. It's not the couple with the red house down the street, it's the lesbians down the street.

It's hard to just be normal when people refuse to think of you as just another person living their lives.
^^Perfectly stated.
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Old 02-13-2018, 12:15 AM
Status: "Happy Solstice." (set 22 hours ago)
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
19,824 posts, read 24,989,256 times
Reputation: 52837
Quote:
Originally Posted by mysticaltyger View Post
Perfect illustration of the double standard I was just talking about in my previous post.

Would you feel the same way if a heterosexual person talked to you about their husband or wife?

My advice? Get out of that small town. Check out Chicago, LA, SF, or NYC.

Lou Reed's song written in memory of And Warhol.

"There's only one good use for a small town - you hate it, and you gotta get out."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6L0UD_zn4A
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Old 02-13-2018, 09:13 AM
 
27,981 posts, read 30,487,031 times
Reputation: 28186
Quote:
Originally Posted by sheena12 View Post
My advice? Get out of that small town. Check out Chicago, LA, SF, or NYC.

Lou Reed's song written in memory of And Warhol.

"There's only one good use for a small town - you hate it, and you gotta get out."


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6L0UD_zn4A
You're responding to the wrong poster. I don't live in a small town.

However, I do live in the SF Bay Area and I honestly can't recommend it unless you're very confident you can earn a 6 figure income. The Bay Area may be liberal about gays, but it's got very illiberal housing policies that prevent new housing from being built, jacking up home prices and rents. It's the same story in NYC and LA. A lot of small town gays would be better off in mid sized metros like Salt Lake City, Denver (although it's getting expensive, too), or Columbus, OH.
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Old 08-26-2018, 10:37 PM
 
Location: Des Moines, IA
36 posts, read 72,351 times
Reputation: 36
Heterosexual male here who lives in Des Moines but is from a small town in Central Iowa. You will have people in any town that may disagree with gay marriage and may be stand-offish or a smaller amount who are plain rude. Most people in Iowa are however are kind and will treat you with respect. Honestly the immigration issue is more apt to stir up the older conservative crowd than gays living among them.

Iowa is a great quiet state and is (still - thankfully) a secret in the USA.
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