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I just remembered this afternoon that my community is have a Holiday Party tonight at 8 p.m., but I am in the midst of my year of mourning for my father, my his memory be for a blessing. I know of course that I do not attend celebrations such as weddings or bar mitzvahs (the party part with the music and dancing), but what are the guidelines concerning something of this nature? (I'm thinking it's a "no.")
From my experience with previous years, it does have a rather festive atmosphere.
IMHO, I would not go. This is one set of the laws (but there are plenty of others - I believe "The Jewish Way in Death and Mourning" has a chart in the back). https://www.halachipedia.com/index.p...=Twelve_Months
IMHO, I would not go. This is one set of the laws (but there are plenty of others - I believe "The Jewish Way in Death and Mourning" has a chart in the back). https://www.halachipedia.com/index.p...=Twelve_Months
Thank you, Rabbi. As I was waiting a response, I decided to skip it - just didn't feel right. (I recall how last year it was all decked out in holiday decorations, and it felt decidedly like a celebration.)
Thank you too for the link. The one item that surprised me was the first listed - that one does not go to a wedding at all. My understanding was that one could go to the ceremony but should avoid the celebratory activities (reception, dinner-dance, whatever) that follows.
As long as I have your "ear" - and thank you! - what about Simchas Torah? (Too late now, but wondering.) I skipped all the festivities surrounding that, but an Orthodox woman told me that mourning was suspended for Simchas Torah (just as it is for Shabbos during the shiva week). Are you in agreement with that opinion?
Thank you, Rabbi. As I was waiting a response, I decided to skip it - just didn't feel right. (I recall how last year it was all decked out in holiday decorations, and it felt decidedly like a celebration.)
Thank you too for the link. The one item that surprised me was the first listed - that one does not go to a wedding at all. My understanding was that one could go to the ceremony but should avoid the celebratory activities (reception, dinner-dance, whatever) that follows.
As long as I have your "ear" - and thank you! - what about Simchas Torah? (Too late now, but wondering.) I skipped all the festivities surrounding that, but an Orthodox woman told me that mourning was suspended for Simchas Torah (just as it is for Shabbos during the shiva week). Are you in agreement with that opinion?
Thank you again.
The way I’ve seen it - fwiw - is you can attend ST hakafos, but remain out of the way and non participatory.
Thank you, Rabbi. As I was waiting a response, I decided to skip it - just didn't feel right. (I recall how last year it was all decked out in holiday decorations, and it felt decidedly like a celebration.)
Thank you too for the link. The one item that surprised me was the first listed - that one does not go to a wedding at all. My understanding was that one could go to the ceremony but should avoid the celebratory activities (reception, dinner-dance, whatever) that follows.
As long as I have your "ear" - and thank you! - what about Simchas Torah? (Too late now, but wondering.) I skipped all the festivities surrounding that, but an Orthodox woman told me that mourning was suspended for Simchas Torah (just as it is for Shabbos during the shiva week). Are you in agreement with that opinion?
Thank you again.
From what I understand, people generally go to the chuppah (the ceremony, itself) but not to any other part of the wedding.
Public mourning practices are suspended (to some degree) on the sabbath and holidays, but you only go to what you are comfortable going to. I stayed away from most everything for the year, mostly because I never wanted to go to them anyway and this was a convenient excuse.
From what I understand, people generally go to the chuppah (the ceremony, itself) but not to any other part of the wedding.
Public mourning practices are suspended (to some degree) on the sabbath and holidays, but you only go to what you are comfortable going to. I stayed away from most everything for the year, mostly because I never wanted to go to them anyway and this was a convenient excuse.
That's exactly how I felt about going to the Holiday Party (before you had a chance to respond). It just didn't feel right to be in the midst of such festivities, and I had come to the decision to forego it regardless of the actual "rule."
Thanks again.
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