Is LA worth it for gay man? Honestly?!! (Los Angeles, San Diego: apartment, rentals)

[Chimérique]

Here's my .02 cents:

If you choose LA make sure you are very close to work under 10miles, 5miles would be ideal. If you work out of your home or have off-hours this is not so important, but if you work a 9-5, it is very important you keep work and home nearby.

LA is great for a Gay Guy. If you have a strong disposition, you will weed out the bad guys. Your opportunities will be endless. Keep yourself busy with your hobbies, join a gay gym, gay yoga, gay volleyball, etc. etc. You will never stop discovering LA and Southern California. LA has an energy thats slighty vamped up over SF. It's urban but has always been more than urban and sometimes anti-urban in an attractive, particularly Southern California way. LA has a connection with NYC like no other city in the USA. LA is vast, overwhelming, and I am talking only the core-central part of LA; if you work it right, this can be beneficial to you.

The car culture can be isolating but most places all over the country are car centric and the urban pedestrian culture of NYC/SF doesn't mean you are automatically going to have a better quality of life. In any big city it takes a long time to create a stable circle of quality friendships.

If you always wanted to move to LA and its in your gut: Do it!

[the one]

i live here in LA. count gays amongst my close friends and they are just like everyone else.

LA can be expensive, but even if you dont have money you can really enjoy life here. there is the west hollywood gays. the east hollywood/silver lake gays. the long beach gays. the eastside gays. and then there are the neil patrick harris gays.

each species is different. each one can live here. its a matter of how you live your life. many many people of modest incomes raise families in LA (and not only in the hood).

like any other big city it has myriad possibilites for fun and flirtations. as for what you have heard about the people- that is one of the biggest myths around. people in LA are no more shallow than those in other places like NY, SF, DC, CHI.
LA has tons of different peoples. we are good people [for the most part].

come visit before you move out here to get a good feel for the place.

this is my city, and i welcome you, regardless of what you are.

[stepheninohio]

Thank you for all the suggestions. Its important to get the feel of a place from opinions of people who live there and that is why i did this post to begin with. Someone said if your gut tells you to move to LA "do it!" I like that. My gut does tell me that. However, Im also very practical and think everything out before i do it and look at alternatives. Someone also said something about saving money and not being frivilous. I have done that. One of my biggest fears is losing my savings and 401k and winding up penniless eating cat food in a studio apt when Im 65. Cant let that happen.

I do believe LA would be a great place for a gay man to live and meet people and really blossom into who he is meant to become. I think SF and NYC would be the same way. Columbus is the more practical choice where I could make my $$ go farther and still meet alot of gay men and be much more open than I feel like Dayton is ready for. Im still stuck on this! However, the advice and comments do help! I am putting similar posts in the other rooms to see if the vibe is as open and friendly. Thanks again guys. And i think once I visit i can get my own feel for it.

[mysticaltyger]

Originally Posted by stepheninohio

Thank you for all the suggestions. Its important to get the feel of a place from opinions of people who live there and that is why i did this post to begin with. Someone said if your gut tells you to move to LA "do it!" I like that. My gut does tell me that. However, Im also very practical and think everything out before i do it and look at alternatives. Someone also said something about saving money and not being frivilous. I have done that. One of my biggest fears is losing my savings and 401k and winding up penniless eating cat food in a studio apt when Im 65. Cant let that happen.

I do believe LA would be a great place for a gay man to live and meet people and really blossom into who he is meant to become. I think SF and NYC would be the same way. Columbus is the more practical choice where I could make my $$ go farther and still meet alot of gay men and be much more open than I feel like Dayton is ready for. Im still stuck on this! However, the advice and comments do help! I am putting similar posts in the other rooms to see if the vibe is as open and friendly. Thanks again guys. And i think once I visit i can get my own feel for it.

If you really wanna do it, have money saved up, and have a job lined up, then why not??? Just keep your expectations in check. Unlike Columbus, the downsides of living in a place like L.A. aren't always apparent right away.

[Dub D]

Originally Posted by thefunkyone

There are large pockets of gay areas all around LA. I've been here less than 3 months and already been on 3 dates. Come out here and visit first before you decide to move. You said you had friends in the area, maybe you can stay with one of them for a week or two while you check out the local scene.

There are pockets of just about everything in LA. Some people like it, most don't. I don't like making a wrong turn and ending up in the straight up ghetto. There are alot of gay dudes in OC and the beaches in OC compared to LA County are better.

[SandyCo]

To the OP, if you move out here you can always move back any time you choose to. L.A. doesn't have giant tentacles holding you in place. Even if you don't find the love of your life, you'll probably make a lot of good friends, which is just as important.

[JustMike77]

Well, this is interesting. My son is at Ohio State and I'm from there, so I know Columbus and I live here and have a bunch of friends & business associates who are gay (hey, it's real estate). I'd say come to L.A.. First, you don't even need to live in a gay-centric area like West Hollywood to feel comfortable as pretty much the whole city is, at least to my mind, open and accepting of people's lifestyles. But you will have access to the "high target environments" when you want to. After you've met some friends with places in Palm Springs, you'll have a ball as it is also a very open resort town just 2 hours away. Florida has bugs the size of dogs and you've done Columbus. Give L.A. a try. If Prop 8 gets defeated, you can even get hitched. Yikes! LOL

Mike

[marilyn220]

Originally Posted by stepheninohio

Hi,

Im a mid thirties gay man who loves warm weather and the beach. Im looking to relocate to a more gay friendly place. Just finished grad school in Dayton Ohio. Im from here so it was nice to be around family, but I knew I didnt want to stay here long term. I will be wanting to move next summer. I have a few friends who just moved out that way (Santa Monica and OC). Im looking at Columbus, Oh (the gay mecca of Ohio) and other places as well. My concern: is LA worth moving all the way across the country for?! Its expensive there and that concerns me. If I can get a big gay community in Columbus for half the cost of living as LA, it makes more sense for me to do that, and still be closer to family. It doesnt have the Beach and year round nice weather. So i guess I need to figure out if the weather/beach lifestyle is worth it for the $$$ and move out there. Any thoughts on the gay scene in LA? Ive heard its very hard to date and meet guys because of all the attitude and that the guys are judgemental and shallow. Sorry to sound so blunt but that is what i have heard! This is all hearsay of course. Any insight into LA life in general and specifically for gay men would be nice. Thank you!

Your post is funny in that I thought all gay communities had their versions of these types of men. LOL!

I'd stay in Ohio.

[stepheninohio]

@marilyn: haha. Touche! That is true i hadnt thought of that.. Im interested why you said you'd stay in Ohio though?

@LAappraiser: Columbus is a great city and low cost! I have "done it" in terms of I go there every so often (as in a few times a year) to visit friends and go out. Im talking about living somewhere full time though. I know Columbus would be a great place to live. LA i know would too. my friend that lives in the OC that is from here has been raving about Silverlake and goes there every weekend. But he says its basically on par with the Short North in Cbus. The grass is always greener I guess. I do know that the laws are more gay friendly in California and that is defninitely a plus.

[sausa]

Good comments mysticaltyger. I've lived in both San Francisco and Los Angeles. The myth about living "in california" and specifically "in LA" is that everyone lives at, on or near the beach, or is always going to the beach. This is simply not true. If you live at the beach, then you could potentially be there a lot, but it's expensive, and it's tough to find a decent place to live. Also, people I know who live at the beach end up not going very often.

This will sound very shallow but it's true...unless you're an extremely good looking guy, it is difficult to be young and gay in Los Angeles. It's not necessarily because people are THAT shallow (although many are)...it's because of the sheer numbers of amazingly good looking people that flock to the area to become actors and/or models. Mostly they end up as personal trainers or waiters, but yes, "going to LA to become a star" is alive and well.

Of course, that's not to say that everyone in LA is stunning, and that average or ugly people don't make it. They're everywhere as well.

If a low cost of living is your main concern, Columbus is the place. If good weather is your priority, LA is the better choice. Heck, you could try LA and see how you like it...maybe you'll love it and stay...maybe you're a great looking guy and you'll be the belle of the ball. Best of luck to you.