Is it common for a woman to go to a Hollywood hot-spot alone in L.A or an anomaly? (apartment, neighborhood) - Los Angeles - California (CA) - City-Data Forum

jackie100 · 11-25-2011, 07:50 PM

I don't really know anyone and want to go out to the trendier places. Safety is not a concern since I don't drink and I can take care of myself just fine. No need to patronize me about leaving with strange men or being careful of my drink being tampered.

My main and only concern is being perceive as a social reject or an anomaly.Yes, I care about what people think of me; it matters a great deal. Don't ask me why; I just do. Is it common for an attractive woman to go out by herself in L.A or no? I would think that it would be more common in L.A since lots of people move here from out of state and may not know anyone?

No, I don't want to do boring stuff like go to the movie or something during the day time. I want to go to trendy and "hot spot" upscale places known for the "beautiful people" only where you sort of go to be seen; places that are very selective about who they let in. Not casual dive bars. Not with the intention of meeting a guy or hooking up; just to experience the ambiance of a trendy place and "living the life". Just having the trendy club/lounge experience; I always wanted to experience it. (I never went out during my 20's and was a hermit actually). It's only now that I live in the neighborhood and have this world at my feet. I just like the process of getting glamorous, dressing up and going to a trendy club or lounge.

However, I am afraid of being judged by the door man! Other patrons might notice me and think I am unusual. Other women might notice me and think I'm a "loser" for having no friends... ? It is not true that other people are too busy having fun to notice; there are people who are very observant and sober even at clubs and WILL notice that you are out alone and think you are a loser. I am mainly talking about other women because they tend to be the most judgmental and catty.

BRinSM · 11-25-2011, 08:51 PM

more than being judged, i think your bigger concern would be safety. a good looking girl out on the town alone, sounds like a bad idea to me, especially anywhere that serves alcohol.

jackie100 · 11-25-2011, 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BRinSM

more than being judged, i think your bigger concern would be safety. a good looking girl out on the town alone, sounds like a bad idea to me, especially anywhere that serves alcohol.

I can take care of myself FINE. I am not a girl but a WOMAN (33). My main concern is being judged. Trust me, I am not some delicate little flower that needs to be protected from anything or anyone. I am as tough as nails. Safety is not a concern of mine so there is no need for you to patronize me. It doesn't matter to me if you think it is a bad idea; I am in my thirties. I can decide for myself what is safe or not. I will do what I want regardless if you think it is a good idea or not. That wasn't my question. My question was if it is SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE. That is all.

Miss Pip · 11-25-2011, 09:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jackie100

I can take care of myself FINE. I am not a girl but a WOMAN (33). My main concern is being judged. Trust me, I am not some delicate little flower that needs to be protected from anything or anyone. I am as tough as nails. Safety is not a concern of mine so there is no need for you to patronize me. It doesn't matter to me if you think it is a bad idea; I am in my thirties. I can decide for myself what is safe or not. I will do what I want regardless if you think it is a good idea or not. That wasn't my question. My question was if it is SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE. That is all.

It's really sad when this kind of talk backfires.

jackie100 · 11-25-2011, 09:39 PM

Nothing has backfired at all in my opinion. I don't want people to think I'm a naive 20 year old that needs tips as to how to take care of herself. I've had my own apartment since I was 18 and lived alone since then (I'm over 30 now). I very well know how to take care of myself. I don't to be patronized about safety.

pbergen · 11-25-2011, 09:46 PM

jackie100, may i suggest that you consider getting together with West of Encino as your clubbing partner? think about it: the self-professed hermit who doesn't know anyone (you) and the proud social outcast (West of Encino). how perfect is that?

seriously, i don't think you should worry about being judged. if anyone gives you grief about flying solo at the club, just tell them that you're supposed to meet a friend inside. simple.

then once you're inside, no one's going to notice who's hanging out with whom if the place is reasonably crowded. grab a (non-alcoholic) drink, take in the view, and enjoy yourself. no one will know or care that you came by yourself.

and in the unlikely event someone inside mentions something, just tell them that you got lost from your friends - that they're on the dance floor or in the bathroom or something like that. no one will think twice because it happens all the time.

Miss Pip · 11-25-2011, 09:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jackie100

Nothing has backfired at all in my opinion...

Yeah nothing YET...

jackie100 · 11-25-2011, 09:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pbergen

jackie100, may i suggest that you consider getting together with West of Encino as your clubbing partner? think about it: the self-professed hermit who doesn't know anyone (you) and the proud social outcast (West of Encino). how perfect is that?

seriously, i don't think you should worry about being judged. if anyone gives you grief about flying solo at the club, just tell them that you're supposed to meet a friend inside. simple.

I don't feel like I would have to lie and pretend that I am meeting a friend. I think I want to go out alone just to make social statement; the statement that I am not afraid to be alone ( I plan to never get married). I don't feel like I have to be pretend that I'm meeting people because that implies that there is something wrong with going alone and I don't see the reason why. I don't think there is anything wrong with going alone but I think society does; society considers it a major taboo. However, people tend to judge "loners" very harshly. I know some women would laugh if they saw another woman going out alone.

pbergen · 11-25-2011, 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jackie100

I don't feel like I would have to lie and pretend that I am meeting a friend. I think I want to go out alone just to make social statement; the statement that I am not afraid to be alone ( I plan to never get married). I don't feel like I have to be pretend that I'm meeting people because that implies that there is something wrong with going alone and I don't see the reason why. I don't think there is anything wrong with going alone but I think society does; society considers it a major taboo. However, people tend to judge "loners" very harshly. I know some women would laugh if they saw another woman going out alone.

first you admitted that you care what others think about you.

now you're saying that you want to make a social statement?

dude, if you want to go the club alone, just go. it's fine. do whatever you want - nobody's gonna care.

seriously, don't stress about it. you're making a mountain out of a molehill.

Miss Pip · 11-25-2011, 09:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pbergen

first you admitted that you care what others think about you.

now you're saying that you want to make a social statement?

dude, if you want to go the club alone, just go. it's fine. do whatever you want - nobody's gonna care.

seriously, don't stress about it. you're making a mountain out of a molehill.

I thought it was a girl (-_-)