Dating as a black woman in LA (Brea: income, club)

[Breaking_Good]

Originally Posted by bpeeps

To say age/beauty is the "only discrimination" is extremely hyperbolic. I understand your proclamation even though you need to choose your words better. There are many dudes who will hit on any woman, race doesn't matter. But there are still plenty who are racists and won't ever consider dating a woman of color. And being a black woman, she is going to run into her fair share of those men. That's just the name of the game. She will also run to a fair amount of people who will judge/criticize her for interracial dating. To cut it so black and white, takes away from the issue at hand.

Nope, like I said, even David Duke would want to sleep with Beyonce or Halle Barry. The biggest racists in the dating game are (white) women. Just ask Asian-American guys.

I am a white (non-hispanic) guy who has dated every type of woman under the sun. I typically have a preference for Latina or African-American women over white women.

But I am a guy so I will typically for the hottest woman that is available to me no matter what the ethnicity (as long as she is not a ***** and is generally sweet).

[subPrimeTime]

Originally Posted by Breaking_Good

Nope, like I said, even David Duke would want to sleep with Beyonce or Halle Barry. The biggest racists in the dating game are (white) women. Just ask Asian-American guys.

I am a white (non-hispanic) guy who has dated every type of woman under the sun. I typically have a preference for Latina or African-American women over white women.

But I am a guy so I will typically for the hottest woman that is available to me no matter what the ethnicity (as long as she is not a ***** and is generally sweet).

I pretty much agree with all this.

Interracial dating/relationships are so common these days because women have started saying the magic word: YES. In general, men can only date the women who say yes to their advances. My point is, men have been trying to date interracially with any girl that looks good and is generally nice/friendly for years and years (at least I know me and my friends have), it's just that women, it seems, have now finally come around to the idea over the last decade.

[NyWriterdude]

Originally Posted by bpeeps

To say age/beauty is the "only discrimination" is extremely hyperbolic. I understand your proclamation even though you need to choose your words better. There are many dudes who will hit on any woman, race doesn't matter. But there are still plenty who are racists and won't ever consider dating a woman of color. And being a black woman, she is going to run into her fair share of those men. That's just the name of the game. She will also run to a fair amount of people who will judge/criticize her for interracial dating. To cut it so black and white, takes away from the issue at hand.

So why you you suggest anyone of any race worry about people not interested? She should be concerned about the men who ARE interested in her.

[NyWriterdude]

Originally Posted by subPrimeTime

I pretty much agree with all this.

Interracial dating/relationships are so common these days because women have started saying the magic word: YES. In general, men can only date the women who say yes to their advances. My point is, men have been trying to date interracially with any girl that looks good and is generally nice/friendly for years and years (at least I know me and my friends have), it's just that women, it seems, have now finally come around to the idea over the last decade.

That's just it. If she interacted with lots of men and had lots of guy friends, she'd have men hitting on her or asking her out. Of all races.

[MikeNigh]

The uncomfortable racial preferences revealed by online dating – Quartz

seems that black women are the least sought after despite being the only ones faithful to their race.

[bpeeps]

Originally Posted by MikeNigh

The uncomfortable racial preferences revealed by online dating – Quartz

seems that black women are the least sought after despite being the only ones faithful to their race.

There's an OK Cupid study that also backs this up. But the privileged whites really don't see racism because it isn't something they have to experience on a daily basis. As such, it doesn't exist. They don't realize what effect white beauty standards have on the rest of the world because they have the privilege of being white. All they can think is I would date a hot black woman/man, when the majority simply would not.

How Your Race Affects The Messages You Get « OkTrends



Look who prefers dating their own race the most. Shocker.

[angrymillionaire]

Originally Posted by BIGBLUE 951SUR

I think that you and all black women need to acknowledge that black men are no longer an option for you. Because theyre all running off to seek white women you may not be used to this because your from the south. Where interracial relationships aren't as widespread and common as they are in the Westcoast Eastcoast and Midwest. I think its a shame that black men bypass theyre own to be with women of other races. Because black women are stunning beautiful and have amazing bodies. And through experience from dating black women ive noticed theyre very loyal and less likely to cheat definitely marriage material. So my advice to you is to date outside your race because if you wait for a black man to approach you most likely your going to wait for a very long time. Everytime I go out to the bars or clubs I see the black women showing up alone and leaving alone. Because black men are to busy chasing white women. And other men dont approach black women because they think theyre only interested in theyre own kind. Which is not true im Chicano (Mexican American) and im approached by black women often and I love it.

This!!

[R-Tistic]

So....I'm 29, Black, I DJ, went to a HBCU, lived in Florida, visited ATL about 20 times, been to DC 4 times, been to NY 4 times.

I hear this complaint from a LOT, a lot of Black women who move here. But there's always similarities in those that say it....for one, they rarely ever live in the Black parts of L.A, and they don't always frequent the Black areas or clubs/venues. Many of them even accuse most Black events/venues as being "ghetto" and "hood." So they go to the clubs/bars that tend to have a lower number of Black men, which is sometimes because they don't even allow us to get in.

The issue isn't that there aren't "enough" Black men in the city, as people claim...it's just that we are extremely spread out throughout the County of L.A., and there aren't many areas with a high concentration of 25-40 year old single Black professionals. It's a few in Palms, a few in Culver/Ladera, a few in Inglewood, Hawthorne, and then there's a good number of us that still live at home because rent is so high. But it's not like I've seen in ATL or DC where there's apartment complexes, or neighborhoods with plenty singles.

Now, do Black men really prefer mixed/Non-Black women? I will say that some them do...but it's not as extreme as people claim. I still guarantee that over half of us end up marrying a Black woman...maybe even 70-80% of us, even if you always see us on dates with a White/Asian/WTFisshemixedwith? type girl out in public. What I will say though, is that most of us who do like or prefer Black women are for sure pickier and even more superficial than in other cities...and at the same time, EVERYBODY in L.A. is more picky/superficial, so it's not just us. So...what's seen as "thick" in Texas/Mississippi could be seen as chunky, chubby, or even fat in L.A. What's seen as Halle Berry in Alabama may be seen as "she's ok...I don't like her short hairstyle" in L.A. I think that's the bigger issue...some guys, especially younger ones, are selective on that end. It's a class thing as well....the guys in the "hood" as people say, aren't going to be as selective looks wise, but they won't have as good of a resume either.

[NyWriterdude]

Originally Posted by bpeeps

There's an OK Cupid study that also backs this up. But the privileged whites really don't see racism because it isn't something they have to experience on a daily basis. As such, it doesn't exist. They don't realize what effect white beauty standards have on the rest of the world because they have the privilege of being white. All they can think is I would date a hot black woman/man, when the majority simply would not.

How Your Race Affects The Messages You Get « OkTrends



Look who prefers dating their own race the most. Shocker.

Anyone who lives their life by an online dating survey is an idiot and doesn't deserve a man due to sheer ineptness and stupidity. Want a man? Stop overintellectualizing, stop the bull**** surveys, and go out there and start getting laid.

Can't get a man in the whole big city of LA? Look in the mirror and realize maybe the problem is you. You surely won't get a man by posting woe is me on city data, or buy pouring over statistics.

[May_323]

Originally Posted by jamills21

Before I lived in LA I lived in ATL for 5 years and one of the things I noticed Is that the older women get, the harder it is to meet a man, especially in LA. Another problem I've seen is... Fair or not... Is that African American men have no problems dating outside of race, but women do. Lastly, men in LA get rejected a lot... Or so I hear... And some women are too choosy( controversy).

Funny enough I heard the same complaints from my women friends in Atlanta after college. And I've also heard the same thing from women in places like DC & NY. It's all the same theme tho... "Men don't approach me", "The men aren't serious", "There are too many gay black guys" (heard that alot about DC & ATL).

Black Men do like Black women, but they are not going to ask you out just cause your black when every other race in LA loves black men too.

I find it laughable when people compare men to women. Men approach women, however most women do not approach men. This is the main advantage that black males have. As a male, they are more likely to approach a woman for a date. If you approach and ask out women continuously, sooner or later you will find someone who will take you up on your offer.

The best advice that I can give to a black American woman is to go natural. Don't wear your hair processed/straight. There are a number of black women who wear their thick/curly/kinky natural hair who are interracially dating. I think natural beauty is best, especially since there are so many fake women in Los Angeles.