liberal, reform Jewish family moving west of Boston (Dover, Sherborn, Concord, Sudbury, Wayland, Weston)

[kmann-sherborn]

B'nai Shalom does have some members from Southborough & Hopkinton. I used to go there when I lived in Westborough & my folks still go there. Westborough is very nice but has gone through a lot of growth, some good, some not so good. I have a hard time describing it as having a rural feel but that's partly because I miss the way it was years ago when there actually were fields, and farms and horses, which is hard to imagine amidst all the big box stores there now. Not that it's not a nice town. It is, it just feels overgrown to me. Hopkinton is going through a ton of growth right now. I believe it's actually the fastest growing town in the region.

[parentologist]

We don't live in Sharon, but have considered moving there from West Hartford for the past decade, since we drive to and from the Cape weekly in the summer, and have family in Lexington and Woods Hole. We have looked at houses there a few times over the years. When we were first married, my spouse really wanted to live where he could go out the door and hit running trails easily. We bought a palace in Westfield, MA right on the west side of the Metacomet trail, in a beautiful new wealthy small suburban development with very large lots, backing up to conservation land all around. We were miserable there. Neighbors rode ATVs in the streets and on the trails behind us (illegally) all the time. We frequently heard gunshots coming from the conservation woods around us, and not during hunting season. Neighbors' visitors parked 18 wheel big rigs overnight on the streets. Schools were mediocre at best, and underfunded. Too long a drive to a supermarket. Found ourselves driving the twenty minutes or so to the JCC in Longmeadow or to the synagogue in Longmeadow almost every day. New friends were all in Longmeadow. We discovered what our parents had told us all along - live where there are other Jewish people. It wasn't that we encountered frank antisemitism. It was that the people around us did not share our values - education, respect for the law, respect for the safety of one's neighbors. When the corporation I was working with closed down, I knew that we would move. We learned that it is smarter to live where your community is, and drive to recreation, than the other way around. In addition, we found that it is much better for children's social lives if one lives in a neighborhood with smaller lots, where the houses are built closer together.

My point is, if you want a rural feel, yet want a community where your neighbors share your liberal values, you really should take a good, long look at Sharon. Over the years we have spoken with other couples who have gone through the same evolution that we have. Live where your community life is, and travel to everything else. I'm not saying that you should live in an exclusively Jewish community - far from that. But you will find that the community where the Jews live attracts many other non-Jewish people too who are more likely to share traditional Jewish values. Over the years, living in the most Jewish town in CT, which is still only about 1/6 Jewish, if that, we have had Christian, Mormon, Indian, Vietnamese, African American, African, gay, and straight friends. Every single family shared our liberal, intellectual, and educational values. They all chose to move to West Hartford for the education and liberal environment for their children - even the religiously conservative Mormon families. From our research, we have seen that Sharon has much of the same feel to it. Take a look at it.

[jackshaw]

I grew up in New Jersey and have livee in one of the towns in question for quite a few years. Wayland has a very nice Reform synagogue (Shir Tikvah) and a Conservative one (Or Tamid, I think). Sudbury has a couple of reform synagogues as well, but I've never been in them. Both are nice suburban/country-ish towns. Concord has a non-denominational but really Reconstructionist synagogue. In Concord, you can find New England country village feel and true out-in-the-middle-of-no-place rural feels. Both the Wayland Reform and the Concord Reconstructionist synagogues are quite liberal.

I think Wayland and Sudbury probably have a higher percent of Jews than some of the other towns on your list, though I don't have any data. I don't know Dover and Sherborn well but they seem more country-ish with perhaps a horse-farmy feel, which might be less comfortable for some Jews. Weston will be more like Short Hills, a little more ostentatious and glitzier than Wayland, Sudbury or Concord (but without the high concentration of Jews in Short Hills). I don't think in Wayland, Sudbury, Concord or Weston that a Jewish family would feel uncomfortable. I can't speak for Dover or Sherborn, but I suspect you would be fine there. Don't forget Lincoln. Many houses on 5+ acres -- you feel like you really are in the country. No town center. Definitely Jews in Lincoln as well. No synagogue but you can drive to Lexington, Sudbury or Concord easily. In any event, you can get a really rural feeling in Lincoln, Concord, and Sudbury. Not sure about Wayland or Weston as they tend to be more suburban in feel (parts of Sudbury would also be suburban in feel and West Concord Center has a New England country village vibes).

In my humble opinion, if you have to live in reasonable proximity to a Northeastern urban center and have a rural feel, Concord and Lincoln are about as nice as it gets. Lots of interesting people (though less than Cambridge). Lots of conservation space.

I can't really comment on the commute to Back Bay. You can PM me if

[MikePRU]

I'd be curious to hear where the OP ended up.