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Old 03-30-2011, 03:25 AM
 
296 posts, read 541,459 times
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Just wanted to add that I'm sorry you're in that situation. *hugs*

Do you have family or friends that you can talk to or spend a few hours with just hanging out? If not, try making a few friends even if its online. I know personally that having people around one way or another helps alleviate some of the despair. Getting your mind off of these things is important.

I know it's all too consuming and you probably feel doomed but you need to look on the bright side. It's not over and your time isn't up. Subtle changes may be all it takes to get things rolling again.

I hope you find some ground and start feeling better.
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Old 03-30-2011, 07:46 AM
 
Location: Oklahoma City, OK
5,353 posts, read 5,776,319 times
Reputation: 6561
I have thought about doing something like teaching. However, I have a house I'd have to get rid of and am losing money on it. Additionally, if I ever went back into my field, it would hurt my credit score so much that I wouldn't be able to find a job. Maybe thats a good thing, as it would force me to do something else. I don't know. All I know is I hate my life currently.

Maybe for health reasons I should quit my current job. Its such a poor fit and I'm losing so much sleep over it. That can't be good. I'm just so lost and depressed right now I can't think straight. I wish I was still amrried and had that support at home. I don't even have that. I have nothing to look forward to.
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Old 03-30-2011, 07:47 AM
 
Location: Oklahoma City, OK
5,353 posts, read 5,776,319 times
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Thanks AZ desert. I do have friends, but its not enough. I miss my ex-wife immensely. I feel like I'm drowning.
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Old 03-30-2011, 06:23 PM
 
5,238 posts, read 7,963,021 times
Reputation: 11402
You seem to hate your current job so much, and maybe the field you are in too. It seems you are crying out for change but just uncertain what to do next. I know how that it is to be in that spot. If you do have good friends lean on them a bit, continue to get feedback, and talk to them about helping you make some goals you can work toward. Could you rent your house for a year, and get enough to cover the mortgage? If you are considering a change like teaching overseas, it might be smart to consult a realtor about finding someone to rent it. Or maybe do a rent to own thing. I did that one time, I found the pple through a realtor and it worked out well. I understand missing your exwife, I even missed mine and she turned out to be a lying, using, cheating witch. But I missed her more because of the expectation and hopes I had of our life together, and when she left it seemed hope was all gone. In reality she would never have been a good wife. I think we sometimes tend to recall the good times and forget the bad as we sit alone and look back. Try not to spend to much time alone, and stay away from sad songs. Divorce can suck the life right out of ya, I know how it is, but you have to try your best and keep looking forward, even if you can't see a light or direction right now. Take Care.
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Old 03-31-2011, 08:21 PM
 
Location: The High Seas
7,372 posts, read 15,962,600 times
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I like the idea of making a break for it! Find a teaching job overseas; someplace to take you out of your element and get you enthused about life again. Alternatively, it might be a good time to find a good therapist and hash out the issues of your life. Just having a listening ear and supportive talk can help boost your sense of self.
Lastly, say nice things to people to help make their day. It costs nothing and you'll be a very important person in their lives.
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Old 04-01-2011, 12:48 PM
 
Location: ...
3,925 posts, read 2,557,990 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlguy39 View Post
Thanks AZ desert. I do have friends, but its not enough. I miss my ex-wife immensely. I feel like I'm drowning.
I hear you on the drowning part. I said that to my counselor and he said I WAS drowning. Kind of helpful to find someone who understood me but it was a little depressing too, meaning I really am drowning.

But maybe recognizing it is the first step?

Do one thing different for you. Find one thing you'd like to do, and do it.

You know what I did today? I had an intake appt. at a mental health center. I'd had a bad experience there and was apprehensive about going. But I had two nice people who listened to me and then, set me up with an appt. with a one of the more established counselors there. This is going to help, I know it.

I don't remember if you've tried counseling. Maybe it would help to talk to someone? You do have the power to change your life for the better. Maybe you just need someone in your corner to help you make the steps.

Best wishes.
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Old 04-01-2011, 08:59 PM
 
5,238 posts, read 7,963,021 times
Reputation: 11402
Hey glad you went there today Wild Flower, that's great you are trying so hard. I know the drowning feeling well, I feel that way myself now.

Yeah Snort, something exciting like an overseas trip, a year of seeing a different country, meeting new people, a total change might be just whats needed in Atlguy39's case.
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Old 04-01-2011, 09:04 PM
 
Location: The High Seas
7,372 posts, read 15,962,600 times
Reputation: 11866
Quote:
Originally Posted by todd00 View Post
Hey glad you went there today Wild Flower, that's great you are trying so hard. I know the drowning feeling well, I feel that way myself now.

Yeah Snort, something exciting like an overseas trip, a year of seeing a different country, meeting new people, a total change might be just whats needed in Atlguy39's case.
I got a really nice compliment this afternoon and I'm still feeling the glow from it. It really made my day and will be with me this weekend too!
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Old 04-04-2011, 03:29 AM
 
Location: ...
3,925 posts, read 2,557,990 times
Reputation: 9055
Quote:
Originally Posted by Snort View Post
I got a really nice compliment this afternoon and I'm still feeling the glow from it. It really made my day and will be with me this weekend too!
I am glad for you, Snort. We all need affirmations like that.
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Old 04-04-2011, 03:31 AM
 
Location: ...
3,925 posts, read 2,557,990 times
Reputation: 9055
Atlguy39, how are you doing? Depression is hard. Hang in there!
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