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Old 06-11-2011, 07:12 PM
 
Location: Soon to change
29 posts, read 35,138 times
Reputation: 26

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Katrinika View Post
I will be homeless at the end of the week, in essence, and I'm a little giddy after days of trying to figure out where to go. Thank God for the resources I still have, tenuous as they are.
For anyone following this... Homelessness came. I spent the first day in the office of a kind businesswoman where we both spent the entire day calling and emailing everyone we could think of who might know a place I could rest for three days, re-pack my car, and figure my next move. She called friends, I called Christian organizations. The problem was I was afraid to go to a hotel with my packed car and car-top carrier, afraid of being robbed. All communications led to the county emergency shelter... not a good place to park the car.

I then drove until I scoped out a low-cost motel with a brilliantly lit parking lot and spent a sleepless night praying. In the morning I purchased a good, used tent, drove well outside the big city and checked into a commercial campground for a week. Dry camping... ugh.

There's more to the story, but the bottom line is - one of the many people I was frantically communicating with before I was kicked out forwarded my emails to a friend. This friend's husband died of lung cancer as did my husband. She is trying to run their farm and business alone with no help. We emailed and spoke on the phone and she has agreed to let me go there, talk with her, and possibly stay. It's not a job, a potential friendship.

God does, indeed, answer prayer.
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:17 PM
 
6,434 posts, read 5,250,148 times
Reputation: 13564
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Humble View Post
What can I say? I am touched. What a beautiful, helpful, generous response. One voice like yours can restore faith, and that's simply because there are people like you. I wish I could pray. I lost that somewhere along the way. I just end up feeling like I'm talking to myself. But I do look around, and I do find others that are in worse shape than I am, and I do reach out and help them when I can. I'm still pretty good at that. I just want to thank you for this. I wish I could thank you properly, but maybe I am. Very sweet.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katrinika View Post
For anyone following this... Homelessness came. I spent the first day in the office of a kind businesswoman where we both spent the entire day calling and emailing everyone we could think of who might know a place I could rest for three days, re-pack my car, and figure my next move. She called friends, I called Christian organizations. The problem was I was afraid to go to a hotel with my packed car and car-top carrier, afraid of being robbed. All communications led to the county emergency shelter... not a good place to park the car.

I then drove until I scoped out a low-cost motel with a brilliantly lit parking lot and spent a sleepless night praying. In the morning I purchased a good, used tent, drove well outside the big city and checked into a commercial campground for a week. Dry camping... ugh.

There's more to the story, but the bottom line is - one of the many people I was frantically communicating with before I was kicked out forwarded my emails to a friend. This friend's husband died of lung cancer as did my husband. She is trying to run their farm and business alone with no help. We emailed and spoke on the phone and she has agreed to let me go there, talk with her, and possibly stay. It's not a job, a potential friendship.

God does, indeed, answer prayer.
That is wonderful news! Something of a miracle, indeed. Wishing happiness and good health for both of you!
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Old 06-18-2011, 12:39 PM
 
Location: Southwest Desert
4,164 posts, read 6,314,426 times
Reputation: 3564
I feel like I have to be careful when it comes to asking for "support." I don't like to be flooded with automatic "shoulds." I really just want to be listened to at first...A lot of people don't really hear what I'm saying...Their solutions mirror what I've already said or tried but they were so busy talking and jumped in so fast my words fell on "deaf ears."....They got into the "reactive mode" right off the bat to try to "fix me" and solve my problems. I know about the "reactive mode." I have to stop from being this way when my son has a major problem! ...Anyway I tend to be selective when it comes to who I talk to when I am facing some problems. I don't want to be lectured or made to feel stupid or inadequate. And I don't want to make others feel this way when they have problems either...I "go it alone" a lot just to avoid all the craziness and "know-it-alls" who don't take the time to really listen to me. How do you feel about all of it? Thanks!
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Old 06-18-2011, 02:26 PM
 
Location: Soon to change
29 posts, read 35,138 times
Reputation: 26
Red face You're never alone

Quote:
Originally Posted by todd00 View Post
Being alone and dealing with a sea of troubles is much more difficult.
I agree. That said, it helps most (to my way of experiencing it) if the friends around me are balanced... Experienced enough with hardship themselves to be understanding yet philosophical, experienced enough with helping and having been helped to know what helps most (and least). Sometimes the most helpful people are the ones without a cent to their names... their quiet understanding and un-blaming sympathy go further to encourage me than an hour's worth of suggestions from someone who really doesn't know what it feels like to be without recourse.

Quote:
Originally Posted by todd00 View Post
Sink or swim, or dog paddle till you feel you're drowning, that third one is me. And I'm damn tired of it.
A baaadd place to be. The good news is that, like everything else in life, "this, too, shall pass." It always does, one way or another... for better or for worse.

At one of the worst times of my life (and before I had faith in God) I was walking toward home thinking about how very many things were wrong all at the same time. In a sort of comical, farcical way I decided to just run down an exhaustive mental list of everything that was wrong... It was a long list, a lonnggg list. Each time I thought I was done I thought of something else to add to the list. It became a less-than-merry game to dredge up every miserable thing in my life at that moment, right down to the pimple on my chin. Finally, I couldn't think of a single additional problem/worry/wrong. I felt so justified in my misery... just look at all my problems... no wonder I felt rotten miserable, hurt, wretched, awful.

Then, just to be fair, I figured it was only right to list the things that were right in my life. The first few were easy enough... a few people I was sure cared about me (even if they didn't know my problems or couldn't help me), the fact that I had made it safely through a near-fatal illness, that I had a good place to live (then)... Then it got harder. Ookaayyy... um, that tree in bloom is so pretty it makes me feel good... I got a little raise in pay when I went back to work... What a beautiful blue sky today (glad I noticed)... I like my hair this way... Breakfast this morning was tasty... The list continued, it gained momentum, I started remembering and/or noticing more and more things that were right in my life at that moment. My steps halted as I realized that I could walk another five miles and still be unable to come to the end of the list of things that were right.

Then I thought about past tragic or otherwise horrible periods of my life, things gone by... And realized with profound shock that no matter how bad things had been, when that bad period was finally over I was ALWAYS, without exception, better off than I had been going into the bad time. Careful mental review left no doubt. I was filled with a sudden sense of gratitude... and no one to thank! A strange feeling.

Quote:
Originally Posted by todd00 View Post
Katrinika, my dad was on dialysis for 13 years, he was sick from the time I was 7, I know all about praying and being scared. The expect a miracle signs hung in our house, but no miracle happened. All I have had is more questions as I've grown up. When I see the world as it is, the scum basically running this world, and good people losing everything, it makes me wonder further.
There have been times in my life when things happened that I could see no possible good in... absolutely no redeeming value in the experience. Then twenty years later realized that I had handled a problem, helped someone, knew an answer, or otherwise gotten through something solely because I had had the earlier experience to guide me.

I have learned to rest when it is possible to rest, persevere when I think it's impossible to do so, and trust (God, who else is there?).

Quote:
Originally Posted by todd00 View Post
I've come to believe that God does nothing for us here. He may takes notes as to where we started and how we lived our lives, but I don't think he does anymore than that. That's just my opinion, everyone is welcome to their own, of course, and I'm not trying to tell anyone else what to believe. It just makes the most sense to me when I see and hear of the terrible things that happens in this world.
I'm blessed in that, having finally realized how much I had to be grateful for, God provided a way to know without doubt that He had always been there, always heard my (usually unintentional "oh, God" "God, if You're up there" "oh my God" "God, help me") prayers, and often (if not always, I couldn't say for sure but I suspect as much) had answered in a way that improved the situation.

Quote:
Originally Posted by todd00 View Post
I hope things get better for you both and he does rebound from all this. My dad was very brave about it all, he lived life one day at a time and still found humor and joy in the day. He was lucky he had my mom and I. I think if he had been alone, he would have had a far harder time coping with each new day. I will keep you both in my thoughts, best of luck. Todd
Ray lived a grateful 9 years after the first paraplegic episode. He gave me the wonderful gift of cherishing me, and more than once gave me credit for saving his life. His subsequent surgeries and cancers could not dim our love. He died in 2006. I miss him often.

Life since then has been hard. The housing market tanked and the equity in the house that was supposed to cover the bills and give me something to start over with was lost to the pittance I was able (and grateful) to get when I had to sell the house or lose it. (Many in similar circumstances could not find any buyer before foreclosure, so I was blessed.)

It's hard times for most right now... Even comparatively wealthy folks are suffering losses that keep them up nights. Places to turn to for help, never plentiful, are over-burdened.

And, of course, there is my pride... Boy, does it hurt to admit I can't do it on my own any more (if I ever, actually, did).

And... This, too, shall pass.

I used to wonder why God lets the bad things happen. I don't any more. People like me find God in hard times... and there is no greater gift. I'm lying in a hot, dry, dusty tent right now, with the battery on my phone about to die, homeless not for the first time in my life and finding out who my friends really are. (Changed my life insurance beneficiary yesterday.) And this, too, shall pass. And this time, too, I will be better off when I come out of the bad time than I was going in. This time I have finally gotten low enough to accept the greatest gift God ever gave.

"All things work together for good..." God, I am delighted to say, is faithful.
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