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Old 06-25-2011, 06:27 PM
 
1,148 posts, read 1,679,722 times
Reputation: 1327

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Friends around me all have jobs, nice apartments, and bought newer cars. Me, I am struggling. I live with parents out of suitcases and boxes, struggle to keep my old car running, and I am just "existing" because I have no reason to be here. I don't have a job. I am not helping anyone.

I feel like friends don't want to talk to me because our lives are so different. I can forget about dating. Most guys don't want anything to do with an unemployed person no matter what they look like. Family just pressures me and threatens to kick me out.

I just want someone who cares. Someone who can help, a shoulder to cry on. It seems like the minute you become unemployed, friends, boyfriends, and even family run from you. Anyone else feel desperately lonely sense becoming unemployed?
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Old 06-25-2011, 06:30 PM
 
Location: earth?
7,284 posts, read 12,891,444 times
Reputation: 8956
What positive steps are you taking to realize your dreams?
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Old 06-25-2011, 06:40 PM
 
1,828 posts, read 4,649,658 times
Reputation: 604
There's a lot of people in the same boat right now, took me just short of 2 years to get a job to just get by. All you can do is keep trying to find a job.
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Old 06-25-2011, 07:09 PM
 
Location: 112 Ocean Avenue
5,706 posts, read 9,591,487 times
Reputation: 8932
The last thing you wanna do when unemployed is compare yourself with other who have jobs. There's no quicker way to lose your self-esteem. It’s better to meet others who are also unemployed and share experiences and tips.

No one can spend all day, every day looking for work. Volunteering a couple of days a week will give you something else to do, a fresh perspective and a chance to spend time with others who share your passion for a cause, or who might be in the very same boat as you.

There's 15 million people unemployed in this country and they're all dealing with their own issues. How you deal with life while unemployed will certainly play a big factor in how quickly you once again become gainfully employed.
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Old 06-25-2011, 09:59 PM
 
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, 615' Elevation, Zone 8b - originally from SF Bay Area
44,244 posts, read 80,460,275 times
Reputation: 57154
Keep in mind that the reason people stay away from you is that they are very uncomfortable because they can do nothing to help and don't know what to say. They would be very uncomfortable talking about their work, in front of you.

You should find others in your situation (I bet there are many) to hang out with, compare notes on job hunting, help each other with resume writing and maybe even practice interviews.
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Old 06-26-2011, 09:30 AM
 
274 posts, read 368,921 times
Reputation: 293
Quote:
Originally Posted by imcurious View Post
What positive steps are you taking to realize your dreams?
Seriously dude???
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Old 06-26-2011, 06:44 PM
 
Location: Metuchen, NJ (Woodbridge Township)
516 posts, read 1,348,215 times
Reputation: 134
Please hang in there. I was a 99er and know exactly how you feel and what you're going through. All I can tell you is keep looking, and if you don't have anybody to talk to, talk to the group on this forum. These people on here are going through the same situation as yourself and also are great to talk to. They have helped me out over the past couple of years or so and again just recently.

I wish you the best of luck and something will come through for you.
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Old 06-26-2011, 07:21 PM
 
17,815 posts, read 25,549,008 times
Reputation: 36267
Quote:
Originally Posted by bisjoe View Post
Keep in mind that the reason people stay away from you is that they are very uncomfortable because they can do nothing to help and don't know what to say. They would be very uncomfortable talking about their work, in front of you.

You should find others in your situation (I bet there are many) to hang out with, compare notes on job hunting, help each other with resume writing and maybe even practice interviews.
Somewhat true but also a bit of a cop out.

Many times you find out who your real friends are in a difficult situation. Real friends stick around and will try and help you by asking people they know to help you increase your network.

And it isn't always the people you think it will be.

Eleanor Roosevelt said " Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent".
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Old 06-26-2011, 09:29 PM
 
86 posts, read 202,909 times
Reputation: 36
Hi,you are not alone but I felt the same way when I lost my job about 8 years ago, try to learn something new or brush up on your existing skills, things I did not do at the time. I am unemployed again now about a 5 1/2 year job but am volunteering more with my dog rescue and staying busy. Things will get better for you, I went through downward spiral years ago after my job loss but pulled out of it and even though I find myself unemployed now, I am better able to handle it. There must be a family member or friend who is supportive, focus on this relationship and don't allow the others to get you down, best of luck to you!
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Old 06-27-2011, 06:17 AM
 
100 posts, read 339,473 times
Reputation: 129
Quote:
Originally Posted by datacity12 View Post
Seriously dude???
Ditto.

It's nice to have "dreams", but they don't pay the bills. I've read on on other threads in this forum where people are talking about studying all kinds of stuff that won't help you a bit in a recession.

Steer clear of the visual and performing arts, anthropology, archaeology, and the like. Look at what is going on in the world, and what careers are in demand.

Real friends won't abandon you if you lose our lob. These "friends" of yours actually sound very shallow and materialistic to me.
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