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Old 07-27-2012, 01:28 PM
 
9,137 posts, read 6,570,705 times
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Humans are all over the map. We are like emotional tornadoes. If you feel bad about yourself, then you are negative. If you feel good about yourself, then you are arrogant. There is just no winning. However, this is when you have to make a choice.

I'm here to say, that it is okay to feel good about yourself. You've made some achievements, you've worked hard to be where you are at. YOU'VE WORKED HARD TO GET TO WHERE YOU ARE, I DON'T CARE IF ALL YOU HAVE DONE IS SIT ON THE COUCH FOR THE PAST COUPLE OF MONTHS OR SO, LIFE IS HARD FOR EVERYONE!!! SO SHUT CHO MOUTH AND LISTEN!!!

Just the fact that you are here means that you are at least interested in making improvements to your life. Count that for something.

Find some positive quality about yourself (if you can) and focus on that. I'm not going to tell you to ignore your flaws, as a matter of fact, acknowledge your flaws. They are part of what makes you who you are. Nobody is going to be perfect.

Now, as you are appreciating the positives and accepting your flaws. As you learn to appreciate yourself as a whole, you will be surprised at what good qualities you find about yourself.

Now, there is a catch. You can feel as good about yourself as you want, but you also have to spread it to others. You have to feel good about others too. You have to see good in others. It is hard. As a matter of fact, I'm writing this post to me. If you lift others up as well as lifting yourself up, you won't have anything to feel bad about. No one will have any valid complaints against you. Oh, there will be complaints, but they will say more about the complainer, then they will about you.

Also, as good as you feel about yourself, you must be honest with yourself. If you have to lie to yourself and tell yourself that you are something that you are not, then you might as well save your energy and put that energy to good use and become that which you want to become. Pretending to be something you are not is not good, it is not as bad as putting others down in order to lift yourself up, but it is still bad.

Spread the wealth. (Of course, this is my experience)
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Old 07-28-2012, 02:22 PM
 
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I'm thinking if you truly "feel good about youself" there is no need to "spread" it to others....it's contagious
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Old 07-29-2012, 03:00 PM
 
9,137 posts, read 6,570,705 times
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I have yet to see that...

No scratch that, I have seen that. (in the wrong fashion)

Believe it or not, some arrogant people do feel good about themselves. (I was an arrogant a$$&01e once)
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Old 07-29-2012, 03:04 PM
 
Location: Buxton, England
7,023 posts, read 9,286,844 times
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Really, well it seems as though there is a general conditioning in our society that brainwashes us to think there's always something wrong with us, and that to be better we need somebody's products, chemical substances (drugs, in foods, alcohol) or to have a lot of money, be popular or pander to people's "appreciation". Thankfully that is all a great delusion, but most are totally wrapped up in it.

Anyway I agree with the first reply, becoming a truly happy with yourself person is an holistic process. When you become so, it is self evident and influencing on everything around you with no conscious effort. It exudes from you like light from the sun, just by being so. In "reality" yes you can of course be allowed to feel good about yourself without shame or guilt. Good about what though? In some states of mind some people might be happy about or feel good about themselves for doing evil. So it gets complex. But I'll end here.

Last edited by Weatherfan2; 07-29-2012 at 04:13 PM..
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Old 07-29-2012, 07:46 PM
 
2,405 posts, read 2,767,270 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Weatherfan2 View Post
Anyway I agree with the first reply, becoming a truly happy with yourself person is an holistic process. When you become so, it is self evident and influencing on everything around you with no conscious effort. It exudes from you like light from the sun, just by being so.
It's great to appreciate & love yourself. It's also great to love & be loved by another, which can help you love yourself.
When you feel genuinely happy (loved/loving), it does eminate from you.

Quote:
In "reality" yes you can of course be allowed to feel good about yourself without shame or guilt. Good about what though? In some states of mind some people might be happy about or feel good about themselves for doing evil. So it gets complex...
Becoming happy with oneself may not be as important as being true to oneself.
If you've been through hell (whether because of your own choices or otherwise), you can take happy pills, or let some addiction make you happy - but that's avoiding the hellish feelings, so they'll express themselves behind your awareness (ie dis-ease). And there are laws of cause & effect... we can often choose what to do or not do, but we usually can't choose the consequences. Live & learn!

Before I feel, I think & believe those thoughts that produce feelings.
So, if I want to feel good about myself, my thoughts need to be both believable & positive.
Personally, I've found that affirmations don't work, unless I first address why I really don't believe what I want to believe.
Why do I think I'm no good? Why why why - I keep asking it, until I get to the heart of it.
Then remind myself of my goal... & figure out how to get there from where I am (mentally/emotionally).

Last edited by SuperSoul; 07-29-2012 at 07:54 PM..
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Old 07-30-2012, 01:57 PM
 
9,137 posts, read 6,570,705 times
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Becoming happy with oneself may not be as important as being true to oneself.
If you've been through hell (whether because of your own choices or otherwise), you can take happy pills, or let some addiction make you happy - but that's avoiding the hellish feelings, so they'll express themselves behind your awareness (ie dis-ease). And there are laws of cause & effect... we can often choose what to do or not do, but we usually can't choose the consequences. Live & learn!

Before I feel, I think & believe those thoughts that produce feelings.
So, if I want to feel good about myself, my thoughts need to be both believable & positive.
Personally, I've found that affirmations don't work, unless I first address why I really don't believe what I want to believe.
Why do I think I'm no good? Why why why - I keep asking it, until I get to the heart of it.
Then remind myself of my goal... & figure out how to get there from where I am (mentally/emotionally).


I kind of have the same experience with affirmations. You do have to be honest with yourself, otherwise you might go crazy...

I realize I worded the OP wrong. You don't HAVE to spread it. However, it does help (me) to spread it as opposed to hoarding it. (It disarms my haters, for one thing)

I actually agree with SuperSoul here, truth does beat out happiness, ultimately. (Especially if there is a God and there is a judgment seat where all things are revealed, YIKES!!!)

As a matter of fact, why didn't I write SuperSoul's response?!

HEY SUPERSOUL YOU BETTA GIMME BACK MAH BRAIN!!!

But I don't think I'll ever get to THAT level, Emanate!!! PFFT! that sounds like some Star Wars Jedi Knight, Super saiyan talk right there. (JK)
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Old 07-31-2012, 11:13 AM
 
9,137 posts, read 6,570,705 times
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Okay , what's wrong with giving a compliment to someone else. What's wrong with a simple "Hi, How are you?" I think that if a person truly feels good about himself or herself, he'd want others to feel good about themselves.
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