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Old 10-28-2012, 07:54 PM
 
Location: Lower east side of Toronto
10,570 posts, read 11,130,511 times
Reputation: 9331

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Quote:
Originally Posted by bdgriff View Post
I'm a single male late 30s I have never had any interest in any type of career. Never wanted to attend college because I hated school. I can count my friends on one hand and still have fingers unused. Life has been a downward spiral as long as I remember. I have been to a councillor for help and the meds made me worse to the point I tried suicide.
Stop thinking that social approval grants "success"....What does "school" have to do with anything? Friends? If you can count them on one hand you are doing pretty good. Just be your self and do exactly what YOU want to do and like doing- forget all the pressure from society- be free...be your own person- sounds like hyou are off to a good start- those that say they have many friends have none..those with a few do have a friend...Open up your mind and stop trying to please the world- do as YOU please...enjoy your life...it is not about success..in the end we all crap our pants and die...the billionaire and the beggar..
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Old 11-08-2012, 02:45 PM
 
6 posts, read 31,867 times
Reputation: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by strongestminds View Post
Can you remember if there was a trauma in your life, when you noticed you lost interest in all around you. Its not a "snap out of it" answer, it never is! What you feel is what you feel, and its obvious you have not control over, or like, feeling this way. Usually there was a trigger for some sort of trauma that ignited these feelings. You are probably out of balance and once back in balance you can and will definitely feel better! markymark is right, there are great flower remedies for emotional wellness. There are many more than Bach to choose from that can help you, but Bach is good start if you want to do it yoursel. Your best bet is to always use a practitioner, but you will not hurt yourself at all by trying by yourself. You can pick Bach up at your local health food store. Try Mustard, Hornbeam, Rescue, Gorse & Larch & Gentian to begin. If you decide to try this mixture, I will give you directions on its use. You can feel good, I promise!
Warmly. Amy D. Cohen, strongestMinds and soapsforhealth
When has there not been trauma ? dad died when i was 11. i have always been in the wrong place at the wrong time. been shot, stabbed and beaten living in a bad area of town. five years ago my mother was lost to alzheimers. i have tried prescription and natural health ways of correcting my problems but nothing has made any kind of improvement. as long as i can remember i have felt this way which sadly starts at 13. i had severe flu and pneumonia at once had over 106 fever went into seizure and died. took five minutes to be revived never remembered anything from my childhood after that other than personal stuff like name and where i lived but people and places were all gone.
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Old 11-08-2012, 02:50 PM
 
6 posts, read 31,867 times
Reputation: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by jambo101 View Post
The op isnt alone in feeling the N.American lifestyle has become a bore and has now become lacking in substance and diversity to many,as its probably not going to change i'll have to change,Not sure how to do that just yet..
Billy J has the usual remedy but what do you do when all those things are also boring and become just more boring things to do, Where do you go when the suggestion of a trip around the world sounds like just a major inconvenience.
A personal analogy would be=I've just finished sitting through 65yrs of the best movie of your life,it had everything and more,movie is now over but now you find you cant leave the theatre,so you just sit there and look at the closed curtain..
EAGLES LYRICS - Hotel California
nothing makes me smile or laugh or enjoy life other than my two closest friends and my gf. i always feel lost like im floating away alone at sea. even when i try to make a change things blow up in my face. i tried to get a grant thought i could go back to school. i cant even get enough money to cover one siemester. i cant find work so im stuck at a dead end part time job. life just really has been unfair .
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Old 11-14-2012, 05:39 PM
 
810 posts, read 1,580,513 times
Reputation: 594
I know exactly how you feel. I have tried things during my life and nothing feels like a perfect fit. I can't decide on a "career" I simply just want a job that I can go to and I want to be able to actually live my life at the moment I am just simply existing. It's a chore but I get up each day and force myself to do things, hopefully one day things won't be forced.
I just want to be happy but I need to fiqure out exactly what will make me happy and I am the only person that can make that change.
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Old 11-18-2012, 10:26 PM
 
6 posts, read 31,867 times
Reputation: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy_J View Post
If you have a room decorated with just plain black and white items, you can "beef it up" and make it exciting by adding colorful items - yellows, greens, reds, and other colors!

Same with a person. If you have a plain black and white life, you can make it more exciting by...

-Doing new things - Go see museums and attractions in your area. Go to home shows or the county fair. Go ride a roller coaster. Walk around the neighborhood. Drive to another neighborhood and walk around there. Maybe a poor neighborhood and also a filthy rich neighborhood. Expose yourself to different people and different environments.

-Travel and see the world. You may not need to go far to see new and interesting things. If the coast is nearby, go walk along the dock and see fishing boats. Talk to fishermen. Go to where they hang out and talk to them. Walk along the beach. Go to a large city and watch them build a new tall building. Ride the public transportation, see a new and different city. Some places have LOTS of things to see and cheap to go there like Nevada (don't gamble, just see the attractions.)

-Meet new people - join a volunteer group like Habitat for Humanity. Become a volunteer firefighter. Go to craigslist.org, Personals, and poke through the Strictly Platonic area. Find people who like go do things like the above (or whatever you may want to do.)

-Search google.com for the words...
fun things to do

Do things like the above and it will add a bit of "color" to your life!

well if i had money to travel or do anything i might have a better outlook on life but sadly i do not i have a part time job in a small town and have had no luck on finding more income.
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Old 11-18-2012, 10:32 PM
 
6 posts, read 31,867 times
Reputation: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Therapy gal View Post
You ever thought about mild Aspergers? You do need to get your basic emotional needs met (see The Human Givens Institute : Official Website), we all do. The 'human givens' website is fantastic at helping you understand and get out of this stuck and presumably quite frightening state

i have been to a therapist and councilor i have been on meds and herbs to try to help but they made me feel lower than before. i fear there is no hope for me and it stems from a great many disappointments in my life recently loss of a good job and unable to find more than a part time job lack of money to do anything other than pay bills and fight to stay alive car failing rapidly there seems to be no hope in site.
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Old 11-18-2012, 10:41 PM
 
18 posts, read 29,993 times
Reputation: 19
Wow I can't believe I'm not the only one who feels that way. I'm an older woman who lost my husband two years ago. I'm very attractive I am told and don't look my age but I don't have a friend in this world. I used to have lots of friends but I hardly go out, I hate going out alone, I've tried joining org. but find people today are phony and I long for the many friends I had back in Seattle and New York before I moved to Las Vegas area in the late 90s. I strongly dislike the cold people here, they don't want any new friends and the men here are disgusting for the most part. I really like the L.A. area, I find the people are much friendlier than transient Vegans.I long to move there but at the present my home is underwater. I feel trapped. People aren't willing to accept a new person in their little inner circle and don't hide that fact. I am a very friendly person but it doesn't matter. I would get counseling but for what? They can't teach me how to find friends. I am constantly depressed and feel hopeless. I can probably move in a few years when I get most of my late husband's pension but not sure if I will last that long.
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Old 11-20-2012, 07:23 PM
 
212 posts, read 869,273 times
Reputation: 201
I feel the same way, but I'm more pathetic because I've had no traumatic experiences, I have a boyfriend that cares for me and friends that are willing to hang out with me (though I'm not particularly close with any of them). However, I feel depressed and unmotivated all the time. I've gone on anti-depressants before and they help a little bit, but the side affects bother me too much (affecting sleep, mood swings, etc). I'm unhappy with my career choice and don't know what to do with my life. You're not alone.
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Old 11-22-2012, 12:25 AM
 
3,500 posts, read 4,052,719 times
Reputation: 2170
Quote:
Originally Posted by VX5650 View Post
Modern society has become so complex that I have just given up. Some people really thrive on the layers upon layers of complications that we have to deal with now just to do something simple. For other people it is death. I'm in the latter group.
This resonated with me. All the layers just seem so uneccessary, except that they aren't because not going through and understanding them just leaves you with a sense of not knowing something that you should.

It's like I wish I were born in any other generation but this one. But, I don't know why that'd be the case. I mean, this one seems fine for a lot of people.
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Old 12-18-2012, 04:10 AM
 
6 posts, read 31,867 times
Reputation: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by Billy_J View Post
If you have a room decorated with just plain black and white items, you can "beef it up" and make it exciting by adding colorful items - yellows, greens, reds, and other colors!

Same with a person. If you have a plain black and white life, you can make it more exciting by...

-Doing new things - Go see museums and attractions in your area. Go to home shows or the county fair. Go ride a roller coaster. Walk around the neighborhood. Drive to another neighborhood and walk around there. Maybe a poor neighborhood and also a filthy rich neighborhood. Expose yourself to different people and different environments.

-Travel and see the world. You may not need to go far to see new and interesting things. If the coast is nearby, go walk along the dock and see fishing boats. Talk to fishermen. Go to where they hang out and talk to them. Walk along the beach. Go to a large city and watch them build a new tall building. Ride the public transportation, see a new and different city. Some places have LOTS of things to see and cheap to go there like Nevada (don't gamble, just see the attractions.)

-Meet new people - join a volunteer group like Habitat for Humanity. Become a volunteer firefighter. Go to craigslist.org, Personals, and poke through the Strictly Platonic area. Find people who like go do things like the above (or whatever you may want to do.)

-Search google.com for the words...
fun things to do

Do things like the above and it will add a bit of "color" to your life!
It is hard to do anything new when this town is near dead
Museum and Theatre are big city things. Travel only happens fire the rich people. I can't even go to the next town over from here because I don't trust my car to make it. Your ideas are all fine for someone with money but to a poor man they are dreams or fantasy
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