Quote:
Originally Posted by hinher
I'm not sure if it'd be better to ask this here or on the relationship forum, but I'm guessing I'll get more educated answers here. Anyway, I met a girl who seemed very zany and quirky in a good way. She pretty matter of factly told me she's been diagnosed as bipolar 1.
How cautious should I be with this. I'm not a perfect person myself (aspergers), but I've heard horror stories of people who become extremely violent during episodes. Any advice? She seems so cool right now, but I'm afraid of the side I'm not seeing
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Wow!!
I'm not sure that the answers you would get in the relationship forum would be worse than what you're getting here, but it probably wouldn't be by much!!
Some of the comments here are way off base (and rather downright cruel and insulting, LOL!!!)
Quite a bit of misinformation, at best!!
I'm Bipolar. I had ONE episode of mania. So technically, I'm Bipolar 1. As categorized in the DSM-IV-TR.
However, the one manic episode I had was almost surely drug-induced (I was on Chantix, which tends to push people with Bipolar Disorder into mania.)
So, symptom-wise, if you don't count that 4 day mania I had, I'm much more likely a Bipolar 2.
I think something that you might find very helpful is to go to Dailystrength.org and check out two of the forums. The Bipolar Disorder Forum Support Group and the Familes and Friends of Bipolar Support Group.
You don't have to join the groups to read them.
You'll get a MUCH better picture of what Bipolar Disorder is like.
(And one of the active CL's there (CL = Community Leader) is both Bipolar and has Aspergers.)
The Bipolar Support Board has 20347 Members. Obviously not all of them are posting. (Or even there anymore.) But it's a VERY active board and you'll learn plenty about what Bipolar Disordered people are like.)
The Families and Friends Board 'only' has 2066 Members and is a lot slower.
And since hardly any Family and Friends bother posting when things are going great and mainly come on there when they're having problems because of the illness, you may see some of your fears addressed.
And/or see negative things that you haven't even thought of!!
Good luck!!!
I don't think getting into a relationship with someone who has Bipolar I is just the same as getting into a relationship with someone who doesn't have a mental illness.
But it's not always the way that it's being presented in some of these posts!!
Then again, some people probably wouldn't consider entering into a relationship with you, because you have Aspergers. So you have at least some idea of what it's like to experience stigma and be rejected for something that may not be the problem that some people think it is.
If you intend to ask this girl about her medication, you might also ask her to describe how the illness affects her, overall.
Some poor souls faithfully take their medications and still have a terrible time of it. Meds don't work well for everyone.
For some people, they don't work at all.
There are some (although not many) Bipolar Disordered people who do fine without being on any medication.
So as for the suggestions on here that you focus a lot on the medication, it may -- or may NOT -- be pertinent.
Zany, cute, and quirky is NOT always a sign that someone is in a manic phase.
It's not even always a sign that they are Hypo, much less Hyper.
(I doubt that the poster who stated a manic phase as being the reason knows the difference between the various Bipolar states, or they wouldn't have made that statement.)
She may be perfectly stable right now and still have those qualities.
I think educating yourself about Bipolar Disorder is a wonderful way to go IF you even want to pursue a relationship with this girl.
There's plenty of good sites out there -- About.com, Mayo clinic, etc.
You'll get much more balanced view that you are getting on here.
Now, having said all that, I will ALSO say that I wouldn't jump right into a relationship with someone with a mental illness.
But I might still decide that I DO want to enter into it, after learning as much as I can about the illness and the person and how their illness affects them.
There was only one time my Bipolar Disorder adversely affected a relationship I was in and that was after the Bipolar Disorder kicked in, but before I realized something was wrong and before I was diagnosed and treated.
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