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Old 12-05-2014, 10:48 PM
 
Location: Southern New Hampshire
7,728 posts, read 13,621,208 times
Reputation: 24662

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OP, as a bunch of people told you in your other thread(s), the ONLY way to GUARANTEE that you will lose money on this house is to sell it now, just after buying it. I am astonished that you are seriously considering that since you are clearly concerned about finances.

As others have said, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE get therapy. Something is going on here that is beyond buying a house that you now decide you despise. (Seriously, now you are blaming the sellers for talking to you while you were looking at the house?!)

I do feel bad for you, but I am stunned that your husband is putting up with this. Get help and get over it!!!!!!!

 
Old 12-05-2014, 11:05 PM
 
Location: Michigan
2,521 posts, read 1,765,697 times
Reputation: 6076
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunshinegirl7 View Post
I agree MikeBear that I need to fix this right away, my heart hurts and I have never gone this long without sleeping. my plan is to list it in the spring because we already started painting rooms and bathrooms need done since toilet was broke when we moved in. we got a list of things to do to help get the house in a more attractive state (color of paints, wallpaper) But I know if Indont sell house then I will NOT get over this. I left a rental that I was so happy at but wanted my own place. I can't we. walk around this house because it disgusts me. I let a lot slide thinking we get a deal so now I will lose more or need to replace stuff. that is killing me because I should be getting Chrismtas stuff ready not obsessing on this house. I need to find a rental as soon as we list it

My wife and I buy, rehab, and resell houses. There's always something you don't notice before buying that needs repair, that you weren't counting on. Buying a house is scary, especially if it's your first time! That's just not a reason to have a mental breakdown.

FOCUS your mind and thoughts on redoing the house, and a sale in the Spring. STOP going over what you think are the bad things about it, and beating yourself up mentally. That will just keep you off balance. Find the things that are good, and think about them instead, even if you think they are only little things. Get to that medical doctor and work to find a good anti-depressant drug that works for YOU. They can be an absolute wonder if you find the right one. That can take at least two weeks to know either way. I'm not a doctor, but I'm going to suggest Paroxetine in your case.

You might still be able to pull out of this without much financial strain, and maybe even break even, or make a profit. However, if you don't figure out what factors put your brain in such a tailspin, you'll never recover mentally. IT'S NOT JUST THIS HOUSE that made you this way. You had to be partially on the way to a breakdown already, and the house situation was just the final trigger.
 
Old 12-05-2014, 11:23 PM
 
Location: My House
34,773 posts, read 30,656,484 times
Reputation: 25846
Get help. This isn't about the house.
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Old 12-05-2014, 11:38 PM
 
Location: Verde Valley
4,180 posts, read 9,551,152 times
Reputation: 3652
Quote:
Originally Posted by RedZin View Post
Get help. This isn't about the house.
Agreed, take responsibility for your actions AND go see a doctor ~ seriously! I sold real estate for 16 years and have seen it all as buying a home is HUGE, but there's more going on here.
 
Old 12-06-2014, 12:52 AM
 
Location: Moku Nui, Hawaii
10,445 posts, read 19,952,515 times
Reputation: 9779
Since you're gonna be reselling the house in the spring, it's not even "your" house, really, it's kinda like a short term rental. So, quit with the updates unless they are very mainstream bland and decorate for Christmas and start shopping for the house you do want. Make buying that one contingent on selling your temporary house. Or, if you fell in love with the back yard and location, go sit in the back yard for awhile and wander around the neighborhood.

When your mind starts meeping "I shoulda I shoulda, etc." just rein it back and redirect it towards what to look for in the next house.

Can you rent it for more than your mortgage payments?
 
Old 12-06-2014, 05:56 AM
 
239 posts, read 294,444 times
Reputation: 145
same model with roof problems just sold for 240,000 a few roads over I am seriously going to lose everything I have and we have perfect credit all our life. how can this happen all because we believe our Realor that list price was 350,000 and we gotnitdor 315,000 but updated square feet less went for 1500 more and was used as a comp. we have not one update and things like carpet are in poor condition and all everytjkng is original


please someone tell me how appraiser can adjust another house that was updated to be able to appraise mine for so much when mine is sO outdated. other outdated ones are gojng for almost 60,000 less right now. Someone please. You have no idea we put out life savings on this and I thought I could sell for what I paid with my own dma updated

other realtors told me to wait a few months for those houses to drop off but mine is really really outdated we let so much gon. we could be d a fully updated for same or less how did this happen?
 
Old 12-06-2014, 06:37 AM
 
Location: Bloomington IN
6,980 posts, read 8,538,758 times
Reputation: 17391
OP--You are seriously in need of help from a mental help professional. Either one of two things is going on in your multiple threads which repeat the same questions over and over and over. The first possibility is that you are having a mental health crisis. Your ruminative, obsessive thoughts are taking over your head. It's way beyond mere regret and normal. The second possibility is that you are creating this online drama because you get some odd satisfaction from it. Either way you need help. When thoughts take over our lives and interfere with our ability to perform daily tasks, have normal relationships, etc. it's time to seek help and do what the professionals tell us to do.

There is absolutely nothing anyone here can do or say for you. Any responses we give you are feeding your obsession at this point and not helping you. In fact, I believe responses to your obsessive thoughts are actually hurting you. Getting these responses validates them and increases them.

Please show your husband and therapist these multiple threads. I believe you need to be checked into a hospital asap (without internet access) to help you begin to overcome this mental health issue. Although the term "nervous breakdown" isn't a term professionals use, it's common enough that it is understood. Everything you have written points to this.

Best wishes to you OP. I hope you seek the help you need and that there are loved ones in your life to help you through this crisis.

Last edited by rrah; 12-06-2014 at 06:50 AM..
 
Old 12-06-2014, 06:37 AM
 
223 posts, read 264,907 times
Reputation: 232
OP already made a post about this. So tiresome!

//www.city-data.com/forum/real-...-should-i.html

 
Old 12-06-2014, 06:44 AM
 
Location: Bloomington IN
6,980 posts, read 8,538,758 times
Reputation: 17391
Quote:
Originally Posted by orangenj View Post
OP already made a post about this. So tiresome!

//www.city-data.com/forum/real-...-should-i.html

OP has several threads which repeat this all.
 
Old 12-06-2014, 06:45 AM
 
Location: My House
34,773 posts, read 30,656,484 times
Reputation: 25846
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sunshinegirl7 View Post
same model with roof problems just sold for 240,000 a few roads over I am seriously going to lose everything I have and we have perfect credit all our life. how can this happen all because we believe our Realor that list price was 350,000 and we gotnitdor 315,000 but updated square feet less went for 1500 more and was used as a comp. we have not one update and things like carpet are in poor condition and all everytjkng is original


please someone tell me how appraiser can adjust another house that was updated to be able to appraise mine for so much when mine is sO outdated. other outdated ones are gojng for almost 60,000 less right now. Someone please. You have no idea we put out life savings on this and I thought I could sell for what I paid with my own dma updated

other realtors told me to wait a few months for those houses to drop off but mine is really really outdated we let so much gon. we could be d a fully updated for same or less how did this happen?
So, what are the updated homes like yours selling for?

I assume they are selling for more than you paid, based on your other posts.

Make some lower-priced cosmetic updates. They'll make you feel better.

You may also want to consider posting about this on the Psychology forum.
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