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I suffer from depression and anxiety. I was in love with this guy, but there were so many things that prevented me from going further with him. So many things like he does coke, he's a player, etc etc. I remained friend with him because he told me about his life story and I could relate. I figured it would be ok to have him as a friend than to not have him at all. I stuck up for him, never judged him. I was there by his side though thick and thin, and I thought it would always stay that way. Good friends!
Well, I have been ignoring him for the past two months because I noticed a change in his attitude towards me. In September he started to be come hasty with me, and started to be mean to me, so I just didn't talk to him. Then he started contacting my parents and asking them "We all should go out!" He included my name and then he said "I have been trying to go out with you guys for over a year!" And so he invited me out to a bar the other night, and I decided to go because I felt bad I ignored him. I went and it was the worst night of my life. He ignored me, humiliated me, and bullied me. He kept saying "I knew you were a lesbian!" All because I call a girl "hot" to her face. He kept calling me the other derogatory name for lesbian. He introduced me to people and said "This is my friend Sara, the d*ke" People laughed and thought it was funny. He treated me so terribly, and so wrong. He also flirted with girls in fornt of me and talked to them and left me by myself and ignored me. It was such a terrible, traumatic night for me. Reminded me of the bullied days in high school, it brought that emotional trauma back.
Well I am never speaking to him again. He humiliated me and made a fool out of me, and was utterly cruel to me that whole night. But now I just have immense anger! I can't let go of it. I can't sleep and when I do sleep I have nightmares of him ignoring me and ridiculing me in front of people. I am so distraught and upset over this incident. I am letting him rent so much space in my head. I just don't know what to do? I am so angry, sad, and hurt. I feel like ripping him to shreds but I know I can't. I am in a deep depression, and all I keep doing is replaying that horrible night out in my head. How do I let go of this anger? Will I ever let go of it? I am so hurt, that it's causing physical problems, and it literally consumes my head day in and day out.
Place a fairly thick rubber band around your wrist.
Get involved in something positive, be it a hobby, a group, other friends, etc...
Whenever you think about the idiot and his antics, give yourself a snap on the wrist with your rubber band ("elastic", if you're in the UK).
The best advice I can give you............find some positive ppl to hang out with and that you enjoy and shortly you won't be thinking of this D bag any longer.
Hit a boxing that helped a friend of mine. And yes be with positive people. When ever you remember about this incident postpone to another time. It is not worth stewing your self about what happened. Take a deep breath go for a long walk let it go.
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