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Old 01-04-2015, 12:45 AM
 
120 posts, read 244,488 times
Reputation: 104

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Hi all, I've been depressed for awhile now, and lately it has been getting worse. I feel like I could potentially do harm to myself. I just feel lonely, like nobody can relate to me, and that I can't relate to anyone else.

I ride horses at a local barn and have done so far a year, and although I'm very social, I feel like I have not successfully created any meaningful relationships. Everything is very surface-level.

When people ask me how I am, I say "i'm fine" because I dont want to come off ass the negative guy who is always bringing people down. But then I feel like I perpetuate the cycle of surface level relationships.

I feel like I have failed in all my relationships. I grew up in a broken home, and everything just seems dark and lonely now. My 2014 goal was to go on dates and to meet more women, and be in a relationship, which I failed miserably, I failed very hard. Not even close. The realization of my failure this year is starting to become overwhelming.

Looking back at my post from early this year (may) //www.city-data.com/forum/relat...s-what-am.html

It's painfully clear that I have failed at the goals I've set for myself. To put myself out there, enjoy new activities.... all the classic things therapists tell depressed people. I tried them, and they all have backfired at me. I feel like I'm running around in circles. Things I use to enjoy are no longer enjoyable. I'm no longer a happy person...

To make things worse, I'm successful in other areas of my life. I don't make excuses when it comes to anything. I feel so helpless when it comes to relationships, and love. I feel like I don't have any excuses... but if there are no excuses for why I'm so lonely, then the answer is that it is just me. I'm just not someone that people like to be around? I'm just tired of all the rejection. It's really painful.

Last edited by cancerous; 01-04-2015 at 01:13 AM..
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Old 01-06-2015, 08:59 AM
 
Location: Purgatory
6,322 posts, read 5,027,624 times
Reputation: 9781
I'm very sorry to hear this and I can very much relate.

I don't have any advice, just want to send you my empathy. (((Hugs)))
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Old 01-06-2015, 11:00 PM
 
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
6,279 posts, read 3,184,302 times
Reputation: 3096
Quote:
I don't make excuses when it comes to anything.
And quite rightly. You don't have any excuses. What you do have are sound solid reasons!

I do not have the answers but I can offer some suggestions which I believe will help. I call it levelling the playing field. Three supplements I would suggest you try; L-tyrosine, 5-HTP and L-theanine. L-tyrosine may make you feel more pain (it seemed to in my case) but 5-HTP and L-theanine will reduce your pain.

I would also suggest a multi B group supplement and omega 3. By all means add more, like D, E, A and K and whatever. Minerals are good too.

There is research that suggests that gut flora may play a role. You could try probiotics. That one is not so easy but Google it and find one or once that offer a wide range and in good doses. You'll see what I mean when you do a Google search.

And cut out sugar!

Look into your diet too.

These things have had a profound effect on my mental state which is why I repeatedly recommend them.

Last edited by 303Guy; 01-06-2015 at 11:08 PM..
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Old 01-10-2015, 04:01 PM
 
Location: TOVCCA
8,452 posts, read 12,159,278 times
Reputation: 12380
Try making some friends by joining some MeetUp groups. Forget about idealized "relationships," try friendships first.
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Old 01-10-2015, 09:50 PM
Status: "Iced" (set 4 days ago)
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
61,534 posts, read 58,659,759 times
Reputation: 73908
I understand. When I am reminded that that part of life, which just seems to come so easily to others, is not available to me, I don't want to harm myself but I do think about death someday alleviating that constant pain.

Today my family got together for our Christmas get-together, which we always do this weekend. I had a good time and love seeing everyone but I'm always so very sad on the drive home. I am the only one who goes home alone of my siblings, and even the next generation of our kids are all paired up now. The shame of knowing I am just not good enough to be loved by anyone is too much too bear sometimes. I will swallow it down, and tomorrow I will pick my head up and go on, but it's always there.

The poster above me has good advice. Find friendships, acquaintances with common interests, whatever you can. It helps alleviate the sadness to a degree.
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Old 01-12-2015, 05:22 AM
 
5,162 posts, read 3,095,689 times
Reputation: 8295
Right now, I can only say I know exactly how you feel. And it is worse at this time of year, it just is. I can do what Utopian Slums did and offer (((hugs))). You are not alone with this. Trust me. Stay in touch.
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Old 01-13-2015, 02:09 AM
 
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
6,279 posts, read 3,184,302 times
Reputation: 3096
It's been several days now, cancerous, how are you doing?
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