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Old 04-11-2015, 02:01 PM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
14,323 posts, read 20,094,005 times
Reputation: 18436

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Quote:
Originally Posted by veretina View Post
I was diagnosed, in the hospital. Symptoms were confused with Bipolar 2 disorder. Without going into too much detail, impulsivity, anger, suicidal threats, especially when confronted someone abandoning me.

I never got any sort of psychological help until I turned 22. My therapist told me I should have been hospitalized many times by now. I'm happy I wasn't though. Being hospitalized that much would have made me weak and dependent. I have another BPD friend who was constantly hospitalized and she has no skills to deal with reality.
Well, thanks for sharing that here. I admire the fact that you confront the reality, and hope in time that you can overcome it. I can only imagine how tough it is to deal with, given my limited exposure.
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Old 04-13-2015, 06:04 PM
 
Location: Hartford Connecticut
304 posts, read 329,426 times
Reputation: 400
I have BPD- a Male-diagnosed 2 years ago. Someone earlier on mentioned 'Gaslighting' with BPD- this is not correct- this type of emotional seduction /abuse is used primarily by those with narcissistic personality disorder or anti social personality disorder.

I went through two therapists over a period of 3.5 years (the first one left for another job) I was discharged from individual therapy 3 months ago. I never had any kind of conflict's with my therapist or the psychiatrist whom I see every three months for a medication update.

I am employed in the educational system as a substitute teacher. I have never been hospitalized. There is great stigma and misunderstanding of those with BPD. As with all personality disorders its on a spectrum. Some people have traits that are severe, others less so. My traits are somewhere in the middle. I function at a higher level then many with BPD- yet still suffer from black and white thinking- anger if I am 'triggered', improving with my fears of abandonment- rejection issues as well- my bouts of dissociation are becoming less severe as I become more 'mindful' of myself and my emotions. Some impulsive behavior remains. I am beginning to establish some sense of 'self' which many borderlines cannot define in them selves-- everything is simply shattered or fragmented.

I have been in DBT over a year- its helping me put together the 'fragments' that where blown away as a small child by two warring unconcerned parents. Recovery can take place, but there is lots of hard work involved and the desire and motivation to get better.

Last edited by newerabuzz; 04-13-2015 at 06:14 PM..
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Old 04-14-2015, 05:27 PM
 
6,319 posts, read 6,067,310 times
Reputation: 11945
Quote:
Originally Posted by newerabuzz View Post
I have BPD- a Male-diagnosed 2 years ago. Someone earlier on mentioned 'Gaslighting' with BPD- this is not correct- this type of emotional seduction /abuse is used primarily by those with narcissistic personality disorder or anti social personality disorder.

I went through two therapists over a period of 3.5 years (the first one left for another job) I was discharged from individual therapy 3 months ago. I never had any kind of conflict's with my therapist or the psychiatrist whom I see every three months for a medication update.

I am employed in the educational system as a substitute teacher. I have never been hospitalized. There is great stigma and misunderstanding of those with BPD. As with all personality disorders its on a spectrum. Some people have traits that are severe, others less so. My traits are somewhere in the middle. I function at a higher level then many with BPD- yet still suffer from black and white thinking- anger if I am 'triggered', improving with my fears of abandonment- rejection issues as well- my bouts of dissociation are becoming less severe as I become more 'mindful' of myself and my emotions. Some impulsive behavior remains. I am beginning to establish some sense of 'self' which many borderlines cannot define in them selves-- everything is simply shattered or fragmented.

I have been in DBT over a year- its helping me put together the 'fragments' that where blown away as a small child by two warring unconcerned parents. Recovery can take place, but there is lots of hard work involved and the desire and motivation to get better.
Thank you for your post.

I had a childhood of emotional and physical abuse.

I am wrestling with huge anger - my abusers are all alive well and thriving yet I am barely holding on.

I haven't had any treatment yet.

I've just had yet another relationship shatter in my hands so am triggered as hell at the moment, my rage is focused inwards however, self hatred so acute I can taste it.
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Old 04-14-2015, 11:47 PM
 
Location: SF Bay Area
14,323 posts, read 20,094,005 times
Reputation: 18436
Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post
Thank you for your post.

I had a childhood of emotional and physical abuse.

I am wrestling with huge anger - my abusers are all alive well and thriving yet I am barely holding on.

I haven't had any treatment yet.

I've just had yet another relationship shatter in my hands so am triggered as hell at the moment, my rage is focused inwards however, self hatred so acute I can taste it.
Did he know going into the relationship that you are struggling with BPD?
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Old 04-15-2015, 12:51 PM
 
6,319 posts, read 6,067,310 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LexusNexus View Post
Did he know going into the relationship that you are struggling with BPD?
I didnt even know.

This is all very new to me.

I never told him about the diagnosis as the relationship was very new and - surprise = I didn't trust him yet.

Seems I was right not to, hes just taken off with my money.
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Old 04-16-2015, 01:41 PM
 
Location: MA
1,622 posts, read 1,421,190 times
Reputation: 3018
Being around a BPD is horrible. My SO mom is a BPD and she creates havoc in our lives and has abused him mentally since he was 13. She cares nothing for his feelings or anybody around her. It is all about them and what they need, when they need it. Never never ever trust a BPD they will stab you in the back every single time.
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Old 04-16-2015, 02:23 PM
 
6,319 posts, read 6,067,310 times
Reputation: 11945
Quote:
Originally Posted by stormynh View Post
Being around a BPD is horrible. My SO mom is a BPD and she creates havoc in our lives and has abused him mentally since he was 13. She cares nothing for his feelings or anybody around her. It is all about them and what they need, when they need it. Never never ever trust a BPD they will stab you in the back every single time.
This is a SUPPORT thread not a complaint thread.

FWIW being BPD doesn't make you an abusive person.

Just because someone has a mental issue doesn't mean they aren't a nice person.

You can have a million mental illnesses and still be lovely, you can be as SANE as anything and still be a jerk.
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Old 04-16-2015, 02:47 PM
 
Location: MA
1,622 posts, read 1,421,190 times
Reputation: 3018
Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post
This is a SUPPORT thread not a complaint thread.

FWIW being BPD doesn't make you an abusive person.

Just because someone has a mental issue doesn't mean they aren't a nice person.

You can have a million mental illnesses and still be lovely, you can be as SANE as anything and still be a jerk.
The people that are abused by BPD need support as well. I'm not surprised you don't understand that. Why haven't you even gotten help yet instead of blaming others?
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Old 04-17-2015, 06:39 PM
 
Location: Hartford Connecticut
304 posts, read 329,426 times
Reputation: 400
stormynh

I have BPD and do not blame others. Many of us struggle with this, go through therapy and DBT, we are truly aware of the symptom's we have, and how we can be triggered. Yes some borderlines can be very difficult, but many people can be jerks, selfish, and nasty without a mental health diagnoses.

Despite what some people have experienced with someone with this DX- we are not demons. I have struggled all my life with this, going back to my high school years. I was damaged at a young age, and now as approach retirement I am finally beginning to feel better about myself. There is still more work to do, but as each month passes I become more mindful of all my emotions. Its a long way back.
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Old 04-18-2015, 02:02 AM
 
Location: Finland
6,396 posts, read 5,960,032 times
Reputation: 10321
Does anyone have any advice on how to handle and help someone with BPD who isn't really getting any professional help? I absolutely want to make sure my ex, who has BPD, maintain his relationship with out daughter but it can be really difficult to even talk to him sometimes, let alone try to co-parent with him.
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