U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Covid-19 Information Page
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Health and Wellness > Mental Health
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 06-30-2015, 04:56 AM
 
474 posts, read 319,779 times
Reputation: 385

Advertisements

It's all I've ever known. I'm 38 and only in the last year did I figure out it's not normal to feel this way 24/7.

I don't need to aire the specifics (who cares, really?), it's just destroyed my life beyond fixing. Just feel like utter garbage for being targeted with this. I really wish someone would have helped me along the way...

Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 06-30-2015, 07:40 AM
 
Location: Vancouver
4,506 posts, read 239,378 times
Reputation: 864
Warning -*heavily medicated for your safety* LOL, just kidding.........

No, but actually I am a much better person now thanks to therapy and meds.

Spent many years suffering from depression, bipolar, and anxiety. I also wonder how different my life would have been if I had been diagnosed decades earlier and I received the much needed treatment.

And nobody intervened ever. Nobody ever suggested that maybe I have mental issues and should consider getting help.

Makes me believe that I was probably highly functioning and was able to hide my disorders.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2015, 06:11 PM
 
Location: Phoenix, AZ
2,653 posts, read 2,106,493 times
Reputation: 2812
Tune- It,

I, too, wonder what my life could have been like without depression. I remember feeling great in my 20s. No need for alcohol or drugs, because I felt naturally GREAT. I'd wake up and be ready for the day with energy.

Things happened, and in my 40s, I went into a deep depression (poor sleep was my worst symptom and was debilitating!) I almost couldn't keep a job due to my insomnia.

So now I'm mid-50s and still on antidepressants. I have no hope that I'll ever be the healthy 20s young man I once was. It makes me quite sad, but "it is what it is".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-01-2015, 06:21 PM
 
6,853 posts, read 3,877,039 times
Reputation: 10793
Many years ago my daughter (as a teenager) battled through 3 incredibly tough years of depression. She attempted 3 times, and I could feel the dark cloud hanging over the family. When we finally pulled the plug on her meds, she got better. She still takes a med or two, but she's successful (knocks wood). The theory with her is that it was hormonal. There was no evidence of anything else like molestation etc.

She had an excellent psychologist. Her psychiatrist was a quack. But I think therapy helped guide her through the maze.

It's hard to understand depression. I could research regarding clinical depression, yet it all seems like conjecture. Easy for me to tell someone suffering from depression to find new things in their lives, change it up, move in a different direction. But even in the 3 years my daughter suffered, I could never see the weight she was bearing.

I wish the best for those suffering from this misunderstood illness.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-02-2015, 03:31 PM
 
Location: Phoenix, AZ
2,653 posts, read 2,106,493 times
Reputation: 2812
Quote:
Originally Posted by metalmancpa View Post
Many years ago my daughter (as a teenager) battled through 3 incredibly tough years of depression. She attempted 3 times, and I could feel the dark cloud hanging over the family. When we finally pulled the plug on her meds, she got better. She still takes a med or two, but she's successful (knocks wood). The theory with her is that it was hormonal. There was no evidence of anything else like molestation etc.

She had an excellent psychologist. Her psychiatrist was a quack. But I think therapy helped guide her through the maze.

It's hard to understand depression. I could research regarding clinical depression, yet it all seems like conjecture. Easy for me to tell someone suffering from depression to find new things in their lives, change it up, move in a different direction. But even in the 3 years my daughter suffered, I could never see the weight she was bearing.

I wish the best for those suffering from this misunderstood illness.
You said some very important points. The medical community still does not know the exact cause of depression or what can "cure" it.

All of these serotonin enhancing medications (prozac, zoloft, etc.) offer some relief to the depressed, but they are not a silver bullet solution. In 50 years, I predict science will have a whole new understanding to this dreadful illness and will have other medications to treat it.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-02-2015, 06:01 PM
 
474 posts, read 319,779 times
Reputation: 385
This is my problem. I've done the therapy / counciling thing time-and-time again to no avail. Pretty sure I need meds... But you've got half the world telling you they're good, the other half telling you they're garbage.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-03-2015, 03:49 AM
 
Location: I'm out searching for me... If you see me, let me know... ;--)
3,551 posts, read 1,998,137 times
Reputation: 8070
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tune_It_Lower View Post
This is my problem. I've done the therapy / counciling thing time-and-time again to no avail. Pretty sure I need meds... But you've got half the world telling you they're good, the other half telling you they're garbage.
I'm sorry you are facing this, me too. I wish I'd had support too. I grew up in a family that I separated from emotionally. It felt unsafe to go to my parents for much of anything, so I never did. I always had this fear but all I thought was it was how I was to feel.

Now, 25+ years later I understand enough to not let my depression control me. It is still hard not to let it, but I am almost there. The last six years have been h***. My biggest fear was not being able to take care of myself, physically, financially, emotionally... etc... Well, I went broke, broke down emotionally, could not look for work, stuck in a undesired city and state I couldn't afford to leave. Could not see a way out...

But I found a crisis line whose counselors have been a lifeline, worked at a job I hated and am now moving back to the beloved state I left SIX years ago!!

This has been a journey I would not have chosen if give the choice for sure but I've learned about who I am. I still have many issues and some known fears that if I tried to solve them right now, I'd derail my move.

So, I am putting them on the shelf so to speak, until I can get to a more stable place. When they fall off by hap stance, I put them back up as soon as I realize. LoL

In ten days I move! Yah!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-06-2015, 07:52 PM
 
3,663 posts, read 2,082,062 times
Reputation: 1933
I'm not nearly as old as you but I wouldn't know what it is like. I suppose when I was a very young kid I knew but ever since I was 14 I don't think I've ever had true happiness. I've had little things that make me happy little things that keep me going but regardless the depression I think was always there just dormant waiting for the next thing to go wrong. Lately I've felt it's just part of my identity at this point.
I've tried therapy. I have even seen a new therapist lately which seems nice and more helpful than the others but still I'm not where I need to go. I believe that if I'm lucky enough to gain full independence I will be okay. That's been a lot of my problem the past few years I'm not where I need to be in life. I don't see how that will ever happen though.

But I don't believe in medicine. I have a hard enough time taking the meds for my gastritis. Depression may be a bad thing to experience but to me it's just a bandaid. I guess if you're born this way then perhaps you have no choice if you've tried everything else. For me though mine is chronic situational depression. Medicine won't fix my situation so it will do nothing but make me worse.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-06-2015, 08:25 PM
 
Location: I'm out searching for me... If you see me, let me know... ;--)
3,551 posts, read 1,998,137 times
Reputation: 8070
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nickchick View Post
I'm not nearly as old as you but I wouldn't know what it is like. I suppose when I was a very young kid I knew but ever since I was 14 I don't think I've ever had true happiness. I've had little things that make me happy little things that keep me going but regardless the depression I think was always there just dormant waiting for the next thing to go wrong. Lately I've felt it's just part of my identity at this point.
I've tried therapy. I have even seen a new therapist lately which seems nice and more helpful than the others but still I'm not where I need to go. I believe that if I'm lucky enough to gain full independence I will be okay. That's been a lot of my problem the past few years I'm not where I need to be in life. I don't see how that will ever happen though.

But I don't believe in medicine. I have a hard enough time taking the meds for my gastritis. Depression may be a bad thing to experience but to me it's just a bandaid. I guess if you're born this way then perhaps you have no choice if you've tried everything else. For me though mine is chronic situational depression. Medicine won't fix my situation so it will do nothing but make me worse.
I understand your feeling you don't know how you will ever get to where you need to be. Me too. My best advice is to keep on working towards it. You never know what is up ahead and by searching for what you need. Life always changes and you can influence it to change for the better!


And I agree about the medicine too. My depression is related to how I grew up. I felt so distant from my family. It was as if I was not acceptable or worth loving. And the thing is that all of that was not spoken words on my part. It was feelings that I had no clue weren't true. And if you don't know what you are feeling is not true, you can't change. You can't talk about things that are unspoken even to yourself. I am finally talking about how I am still feeling those feelings.

What helped me was a crisis line that the counselors actively listen to me and give me the support I missed growing up. I have come a long way! I am going to keep making progress, understanding who I am and what I need to do to feel part of this world... instead of apart from the world!

P.S... the more you can tell your therapist what you are feeling, how you are doing, the better. That may sound second nature but I spent a lot of time in therapy not talking about the real problems. But then again, I did not know what my feelings were truly, even six years ago. So, how do you talk about them then?? Tell your therapist about what you shared here. It is important to be supported in the worst of the feelings.

Best wishes. You can make it!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 07-06-2015, 08:47 PM
 
3,663 posts, read 2,082,062 times
Reputation: 1933
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wild Flower View Post
I understand your feeling you don't know how you will ever get to where you need to be. Me too. My best advice is to keep on working towards it. You never know what is up ahead and by searching for what you need. Life always changes and you can influence it to change for the better!


And I agree about the medicine too. My depression is related to how I grew up. I felt so distant from my family. It was as if I was not acceptable or worth loving. And the thing is that all of that was not spoken words on my part. It was feelings that I had no clue weren't true. And if you don't know what you are feeling is not true, you can't change. You can't talk about things that are unspoken even to yourself. I am finally talking about how I am still feeling those feelings.

What helped me was a crisis line that the counselors actively listen to me and give me the support I missed growing up. I have come a long way! I am going to keep making progress, understanding who I am and what I need to do to feel part of this world... instead of apart from the world!

P.S... the more you can tell your therapist what you are feeling, how you are doing, the better. That may sound second nature but I spent a lot of time in therapy not talking about the real problems. But then again, I did not know what my feelings were truly, even six years ago. So, how do you talk about them then?? Tell your therapist about what you shared here. It is important to be supported in the worst of the feelings.

Best wishes. You can make it!

It just gets so tiring because I feel like I've been waiting my whole life to be satisfied with myself (you might as well say I have). Yeah growing up has a lot to do with it. I never had much of a family so my home life sucked. Now I am older and I may have left the World War 3 house but my childhood is still coming back to haunt me. It is very likely that it helped me to be the loser I am today.
I am working on it but it's hard when I'm not getting enough help. The therapist referred me to a program but someone I know said it didn't help her and I find out that it costs. I just don't know what else to say maybe the therapist doesn't know anywhere else to go. I am now trying the program through the local community college because she said that helped her but they said they were filled up until the fall. I know things take time but I've been waiting long enough as it is...it upsets me that it takes me this long to get to this point. At this rate it seems like I won't have a job until next year if that and summer is my favorite season. I really wanted to enjoy it. It's hard to do the things I want to do without much of a personal income.
I know I shouldn't think my life is over but I feel like I'm running out of time for my life to turn around. I don't know anyone my biological age that is far behind as I am.
I don't care if I have to work a lot. I just want a summer job so I can take a vacation even if it's just a few days. Not only that it's hard to enjoy things when you are essentially a grown up child because you don't see how you really deserve it. If I don't get a job I'm really just wasting my summer and yeah there's volunteering but that idea wouldn't make me feel any better because I don't feel right unless I'm earning money. I keep trying to look on my own for work since no one is really helping me. I don't know where else to go.

Last edited by Nickchick; 07-06-2015 at 09:06 PM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Health and Wellness > Mental Health
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2020, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top