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Ok just to start off I am not suicidal, I am just a very bored person hahah.yea but I really am starting to get tired of this rut I am in. I am 20 and a college kid, I just decided I want to be a writer. I have a 2006 Mercedes, and I m just starting to realize that, these cars are over rated. so I'm kind of stuck with it.I mean I really am tired of my job. I just don t understand, how some people can keep working. I asked some of them what were they working towards, and they looked at me and said nothing. I mean that's ok for some people, but I find it crazy. Then the work is very repetitive, and boring. to the point where all I cant wait to do is go home and write on my novel.
I don't hang out with my friends, I am just anti social
I just feel like I am siting still, and nothing is happening. it is a sucky feeling to, so what am I depressed? Is this creative person depressed? sucks man!!!!! the only way I could describe how I feel would be. Me sitting on top of a hill, staring at a orange sunset, with conscious rap music playing. a 78 degree breeze is constantly blowing, and even though I enjoy the sunset, I want to get off the hill. But I cant so what do I do?
I am not a doctor, but just from what you posted here, it doesn't sound like clinical depression. There are websites out there with a lot of information with regard to depression symptoms. Right off of the top of my head, some of them are: persistant sadness, feelings of hopelessness, either sleeping too much or too little, eating too much or too little, feelings of guilt, lack of interest in hobbies that you would normally enjoy, and thoughts of suicide. It does sound like you may need a job that is more challenging, but only you can make that decision.
The fact that you are working on your novel and that it is something that you look forward to doing is a good sign.
Ok just to start off I am not suicidal, I am just a very bored person hahah.yea but I really am starting to get tired of this rut I am in. I am 20 and a college kid, I just decided I want to be a writer. I have a 2006 Mercedes, and I m just starting to realize that, these cars are over rated. so I'm kind of stuck with it.I mean I really am tired of my job. I just don t understand, how some people can keep working. I asked some of them what were they working towards, and they looked at me and said nothing. I mean that's ok for some people, but I find it crazy. Then the work is very repetitive, and boring. to the point where all I cant wait to do is go home and write on my novel.
I don't hang out with my friends, I am just anti social
I just feel like I am siting still, and nothing is happening. it is a sucky feeling to, so what am I depressed? Is this creative person depressed? sucks man!!!!! the only way I could describe how I feel would be. Me sitting on top of a hill, staring at a orange sunset, with conscious rap music playing. a 78 degree breeze is constantly blowing, and even though I enjoy the sunset, I want to get off the hill. But I cant so what do I do?
Little early to be suffering from boredom of life,Consider joining a branch of the armed forces and the excitement factor may rise.
I'll keep it pretty simple...if there's something you don't like in life, get away from it. If you're bored in life, try something new. If you're unhappy, do something that makes you happy. If you don't like your job, get a new job. If stumbling upon an enjoyable job is impossible, you make the most out of your time off. Creating a life of contentment is something that lies within in yourself and it is up to you to make that happen. It is also extremely important to remain grateful even if it seems impossible. What you consider boring and useless may mean the world to someone else if they don't have it.
There's also nothing wrong with being anti-social. If you feel more freedom when you're alone, so be it. I spend my time off adventuring alone, spending time in nature. I wouldn't trade it for anything!
Sounds like you went and did what your 'supposed' to do like the car and maybe what your doing in college, and you realize that it isn't you. If you own the car, I'd say live with it. Just think about what sort would be the one you'd like to have when you can. Are you taking writing classes at school? Try a few. Meet other people who like to write. Find people who relate. Is there an school organization which is about something your interested in? If you like being alone and peaceful on the mountain, then there is NOTHING wrong with you either. Some of us like being part of the crowd. Some of us would rather be watching from the sidelines. But cultivate places where there are people who like what you like and don't worry if the rest aren't like you.
Introverts are often called anti social or other negative things (at least negative from the point of view of the ones judging) and its insinuated that there's something wrong with them. Don't buy it. If that's who you are, then its right for you. Look at things you enjoy and find places/people who like the same and can relate. And when there's been too many people, find a quiet spot for yourself.
If you love writing, then finding other people who have a joy in writing you can share might be the first step in making you feel like your not alone. And you can learn to be a better writer with the feedback you give and get. And find a place you feel comfortable, crank down the music until its low, take pen and paper and write a list of things you like/enjoy/would do if you could, and the things which you feel like a stranger in a strange land. Some you have to deal with, but you're not oblidged to be like everything your 'supposed' to do. And actively seek out opportunities to explore stuff you like. And leave enough 'alone time' for you to destress from the people.
At your age, I'm assuming early 20's or before, you get your first real chance to find out who's inside, and if you've come to love writing by all means, use that as your core but don't make it everything.
The boys and men that shoot up churches and schools are anti-social.
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