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My dog keeps me from committing myself. If it wasn’t for my 7 year old Irish setter I would commit myself to a mental institution. But if I did that I don’t have anyone to care for my dog. She depends on me. I’m so depressed I want to die but again who would take care of my dog. I’m 69 years old and feel sick all the time. I get up in the morning and until the afternoon I just suffer from cringing, and I can’t even explain the misery I feel. In the afternoon I’m better. I’ve taken Vicodin for years for my depression but can’t do it anymore. No drug works for me and I’ve tried about 20 of them. I’m selling my house and moving in less than 3 weeks and don’t know where. I’ve given almost $10K worth of stuff away and still have a house full of furnisher. I’m going to a retirement center and don’t know which one or what to keep and what so give away and what to sale. I can’t make decisions. I am so stressed out I can’t figure out why I’m still alive. I need to make a decision on what to do and if I can do that I might just get a little better. I feel so sorry for my dog because I don’t have the energy to play with her. I just wanted to vent. Thank you for reading this.
You are not alone. I too feel this way and it hurts. You are alive because you are a unique person who has talents and gifts that only you can bring to this world. Part of your life journey is to learn to believe that. I say this from my own experience and I am trying to learn it too.
I hope you can find help to take care of your dog. I encourage you to continue to search for help for yourself. You deserve to live without this weight.
There is so much WE CAN DO to feel better and healthier....so much help at our fingertips. Since you are not asking for any help, I'll not offer. But drugs can do just so much. Hope you can work things out.
Lostsoul, you are not alone. My cats keep me going for the same reason as you - no one to care for them if I am gone.
Now, let's breathe for a moment. Your house sold and you are moving in three weeks but you don't know where? Is there any way to cancel the contract? Selling your home is huge, especially if you have no alternate place yet. Can you bring dogs to these retirement homes? Do you have to sell? Can you perhaps hire a companion a few days a week?
Clearing out furnishing is incredibly stressful. I recently cleared out a house that had 50 years worth of stuff - I thought I would lose my mind - didn't know what to sell, donate, keep, or trash. Be very careful - it's easy to toss stuff you may want later - I did that with some things.
Being 69 years old and not in good health I am going to take most of the furnisher and everything that my ex-wife and I had and put them in an auction and keep just enough stuff to go into a 400 square foot studio retirement center which allows my dog. I'm just not strong enough to buy and care for a house. Then I'm going to buy a scooter so I can take my Irish setter on walks. I would never have to cook again because I can't make my meal anyway and daily interaction with people so it's the best thing for me and I'm going to go to Amarillo where it's quite and big enough do some things.
Being 69 years old and not in good health I am going to take most of the furnisher and everything that my ex-wife and I had and put them in an auction and keep just enough stuff to go into a 400 square foot studio retirement center which allows my dog. I'm just not strong enough to buy and care for a house. Then I'm going to buy a scooter so I can take my Irish setter on walks. I would never have to cook again because I can't make my meal anyway and daily interaction with people so it's the best thing for me and I'm going to go to Amarillo where it's quite and big enough do some things.
That sounds like quite a good plan, actually. I am SO happy you can take your dog with you! That is the most important thing, IMO - since your dog provides such love and support. Pets are our family. The scooter sounds awesome!
Being 69 years old and not in good health I am going to take most of the furnisher and everything that my ex-wife and I had and put them in an auction and keep just enough stuff to go into a 400 square foot studio retirement center which allows my dog. I'm just not strong enough to buy and care for a house. Then I'm going to buy a scooter so I can take my Irish setter on walks. I would never have to cook again because I can't make my meal anyway and daily interaction with people so it's the best thing for me and I'm going to go to Amarillo where it's quite and big enough do some things.
Sounds like a good plan. I hope you'll keep updating this thread I'd like to hear how you're doing.
I hope you find some human companionship at your new place...Please try to take advantage of social activities they may offer. Interaction with other stimulates healthy brain chemicals.
I'm just 64, but sometimes I look down the road and the storm of what iffs hit me and I just have to shut them all down. But I moved eight years ago. The world around me was memories. I needed to get past them. I don't really 'fit' in this state in a lot of ways, but I do in some important ones, like not being in a hurry. Everyone was always just too busy for me in socal.
I have my pets, and they are my family. Unlike humans, they never betray you. I've had too many humans who do. Sometimes I feel trapped, since I do have things I'd like to do, but financially its not in the cards. But the house and my magnificent old tree which covers most of the yard, and that people here don't hurry, and don't expect other people too make it feel more like home than any other.
My pets, dogs and cats, are part of what makes home home. My oldest dog has a hurt leg, how it got that way unknown, but she was able to stand up, walk to the bedroom and climb on the bed with it so it will heal. But my four legged kids keep me going. Things did not go well the last years before I moved, and my pets kept me going.
I'm a loner by nature, and can take only so much 'people time' so its quite rare that I actually miss general people. People who've gathered to celebrate something I love, like science fiction cons, wakes up my social side. I need some of that, but when I do get to go to one, the day home there is a huge sigh of relief that its quiet and the critters are waiting and I can turn 'off'.
Maybe the op should become familiar with others walking their dogs. It's automatically something you share. And if your not into people that deeply, you can get your 'social' without exhaustion if its about something everyone there loves.
But nobody should be afraid of moving when the place you live just doesn't serve you in any postive way.
And do see someone about the depression. I've never heard of vicodine for it, thought it would zone you out enough triggers might be unnoticed. A lot of other stuff too.
I found that the depression ended when I moved away from a place where I did not want to be and away from the memories I don't want to be reminded of every day.
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