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Old 08-06-2017, 11:55 PM
 
2 posts, read 1,801 times
Reputation: 23

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I am 56 and post menopausal, depressed and I think I could be gone and my handicapped daughter and my husband would be the only ones to even know I was gone. I just don't feel anything. I realize I am the one that cut myself off but I didn't feel I could do anything different. I am overweight and don't like who I am. I have to work my full time job but I think my co workers are sick of me. I am trying to follow a strict weight program but I keep blowing it cause while I'm eating those carbs I quit feeling that hole in side of me constantly question what's wrong with you? I really wish I'd disappear. I am so lonely but all I want to talk about is the things that are making me sad. I feel like my growth was emotionally stopped at like 14 years old.
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Old 08-07-2017, 12:55 AM
 
Location: Tricity, PL
61,430 posts, read 86,526,431 times
Reputation: 131279
Did you see a doctor??
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Old 08-07-2017, 09:22 AM
 
Location: between Mars and Venus
1,748 posts, read 1,291,384 times
Reputation: 2471
You still have your husband and daughter there it's not as bad as you think. Some people overweight have difficulty finding a partner for all you know.
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Old 08-07-2017, 09:49 AM
 
Location: Wonderland
67,652 posts, read 60,589,303 times
Reputation: 101051
I'm 55 and post menopausal and too "fluffy" myself. I have to take care of my disabled mom. Like you, I'm married as well (happily married just for the record).

Just to clarify, I don't know why you are categorizing yourself as "post menopausal." To me, I may as well say "I'm 55, and I have dark brown eyes." I mean, so what? Being "post menopausal" shouldn't affect your self worth. Personally, I prefer not having to deal with periods anymore but hey, that's just me! And no more birth control - WOOHOO!!!!

Anyway, back to the topic. Can you get involved in some volunteer work? Maybe with your husband or your daughter or both - or maybe just by yourself.

It sounds like you need an outside interest and maybe with a focus on the needs of others. That's what helps me keep centered on what's good in my life. You have lots of good in your life. Go give some help to people who need it worse than you do (and there are plenty of people in the world who fit into that category).

Also, join a water aerobics class or a yoga class.

And finally, actually maybe as a first move, go to the doctor for a regular physical and blood work. You may need a supplement or something, who knows? But before I started popping anti depressants or anti anxiety pills, I'd try the physical exercise thing first. It's amazing how much better you will feel after an hour workout - even if it's not strenuous - it's movement and activity and for that hour it's about you nurturing you. We all need that.
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Old 08-07-2017, 09:54 AM
 
Location: 49th parallel
4,596 posts, read 3,271,309 times
Reputation: 9566
OP, I agree with Kathryn above. You seem to need a focus, and your family doesn't seem to provide it. If it were me, I would definitely try to do as she says above, and find a volunteer situation. Even though you have a full-time job, you need something to take your mind off yourself, and just maybe getting yourself very busy will help. Don't know where to start looking for volunteer things? Mention that and some of us will come up with ideas.
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Old 08-07-2017, 01:25 PM
 
Location: Wonderland
67,652 posts, read 60,589,303 times
Reputation: 101051
Quote:
Originally Posted by ndcairngorm View Post
OP, I agree with Kathryn above. You seem to need a focus, and your family doesn't seem to provide it. If it were me, I would definitely try to do as she says above, and find a volunteer situation. Even though you have a full-time job, you need something to take your mind off yourself, and just maybe getting yourself very busy will help. Don't know where to start looking for volunteer things? Mention that and some of us will come up with ideas.

Right on. I have a ton of ideas to share!
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Old 08-15-2017, 03:20 AM
 
1,752 posts, read 3,744,667 times
Reputation: 2089
OP has disappeared...................................
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Old 08-17-2017, 07:08 PM
 
21,108 posts, read 13,492,959 times
Reputation: 19722
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaye Hermann View Post
I am 56 and post menopausal, depressed and I think I could be gone and my handicapped daughter and my husband would be the only ones to even know I was gone. I just don't feel anything. I realize I am the one that cut myself off but I didn't feel I could do anything different. I am overweight and don't like who I am. I have to work my full time job but I think my co workers are sick of me. I am trying to follow a strict weight program but I keep blowing it cause while I'm eating those carbs I quit feeling that hole in side of me constantly question what's wrong with you? I really wish I'd disappear. I am so lonely but all I want to talk about is the things that are making me sad. I feel like my growth was emotionally stopped at like 14 years old.
Your hormones due to being PM might be driving a lot of these feelings. Not sure why anyone would remark that is an insignificant detail. Please do look into the hormonal aspect and see a therapist as well!
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Old 08-17-2017, 07:32 PM
 
Location: Tricity, PL
61,430 posts, read 86,526,431 times
Reputation: 131279
Quote:
Originally Posted by jencam View Post
Your hormones due to being PM might be driving a lot of these feelings. Not sure why anyone would remark that is an insignificant detail. Please do look into the hormonal aspect and see a therapist as well!
Absolutely!! It's well known that women who have never had mental health issues, may experience symptoms like mood swings, depression or anxiety, on the top of other changes like increased risk for a number of health conditions, such as osteoporosis and heart disease. Some people have trouble sleeping and find themselves feeling unusually tired, moody or irritable. They might have difficulty concentrating and suffer from memory lapses.

You may be able to alleviate some of the mental health symptoms associated with menopause by eating well and exercising regularly. Your doctor might prescribe a hormone therapy, that could relieve emotional symptoms of menopause.
If your anxiety and/or depression become so severe that everyday life is disrupted and your ability to accomplish routine daily activities is impaired, you should seek professional help. More specific reasons to seek help include having suicidal thoughts or feelings, having negative feelings that persist for a long time or not having anyone with whom you can share your thoughts and feelings.
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Old 08-19-2017, 03:03 AM
 
8,238 posts, read 6,558,508 times
Reputation: 23140
Quote:
Originally Posted by KathrynAragon View Post

Just to clarify, I don't know why you are categorizing yourself as "post menopausal." To me, I may as well say "I'm 55, and I have dark brown eyes." I mean, so what? Being "post menopausal" shouldn't affect your self worth.

And finally, actually maybe as a first move, go to the doctor for a regular physical and blood work. You may need a supplement or something, who knows? But before I started popping anti depressants or anti anxiety pills, I'd try the physical exercise thing first. It's amazing how much better you will feel after an hour workout - even if it's not strenuous - it's movement and activity and for that hour it's about you nurturing you. We all need that.
I agree with KathrynAragon!

And being past menopause should not mean nor does it automatically mean the maladies listed in the other posts. It has no effect on most women. But it is still full of false old wives tales, and falsehoods perpetuated by the for-profit Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) industry and cadre of doctors and health professional who make a living off of it.

Last edited by matisse12; 08-19-2017 at 03:16 AM..
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