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I started feeling like this when I was around age 10. I was put into therapy and diagnosed with PTSD by the age of 13. After that i stopped getting help and separated myself from my family. These feelings still continue to this day. I know I should go back to therapy and probably be on meds to. I hope for myself that it gets better once i get onto the right path of care.
I started feeling like this when I was around age 10. I was put into therapy and diagnosed with PTSD by the age of 13. After that i stopped getting help and separated myself from my family. These feelings still continue to this day. I know I should go back to therapy and probably be on meds to. I hope for myself that it gets better once i get onto the right path of care.
This might not apply to you, but in many cases, all family and friends abandon those of us with mental disorders because we don’t do and say what they want us to. Once the mental illness is exposed, everyone wants to control your life, and once figuring out it won’t be easy enough for them to do so, they will cut you off.
Hmm. I have not encountered anything similar to that. I just don't have any interests that line up with other people. Something was wrong early on, or perhaps I thought so, but now I doubt there is anything 'wrong' with my personality, it just isn't a likable one for anyone else. I do also believe I have psychotic tendencies, just not the kind of psychotic who hates others to the point of random violence.
It wasn't a personality thing, it was OCD in my case.
Well, it's good to know you don't have a desire to express yourself violently.
Can you expound on what it is specifically in your personality that turns others away?
And more importantly, does it bother you to be this way and would you be interested in making structural change to have better relationships, or are you OK with remaining the way you are?
There's no correct answer to that those last questions. I was just wondering.
This might not apply to you, but in many cases, all family and friends abandon those of us with mental disorders because we don’t do and say what they want us to. Once the mental illness is exposed, everyone wants to control your life, and once figuring out it won’t be easy enough for them to do so, they will cut you off.
I have a mentally ill daughter, and I have no desire (or ability!) to control her nor would I ever cut her off, even during her bad periods when she has cut me off.
She speaks up against the stigma shown by some toward mental illness when it arises. I'm sorry that has been your experience. Education is still very necessary about mental disorders. There are support groups for family members.
It wasn't a personality thing, it was OCD in my case.
Well, it's good to know you don't have a desire to express yourself violently.
Can you expound on what it is specifically in your personality that turns others away?
And more importantly, does it bother you to be this way and would you be interested in making structural change to have better relationships, or are you OK with remaining the way you are?
There's no correct answer to that those last questions. I was just wondering.
Yes, I am fine with who I am. I’m a creative type. My life revolves around anything I can do without other people being around. I actually enjoy that others exist and are busy doing their extroverted things. Gives me more to imagine and create.
I have a mentally ill daughter, and I have no desire (or ability!) to control her nor would I ever cut her off, even during her bad periods when she has cut me off.
She speaks up against the stigma shown by some toward mental illness when it arises. I'm sorry that has been your experience. Education is still very necessary about mental disorders. There are support groups for family members.
That’s a good to hear. Every person in my life has in the past or right now cut me off in some way or another for whatever reason. But then every single one has had addictions of some sort and participated in some extremely dangerous behavior. Even those people who have been friends at one time have either sexual or drug addictions. So I have decided not to be forced into hanging with people who don’t enjoy what I do and I don’t enjoy what they do. So I suppose that I have cut people off as well. BTW, they all have good paying jobs and are extremely extroverted. They know how to carry conversations and have a good time despite the addictions. So, if my changing requires addiction (and being around other people would cause that), I would not want to change one thing about myself.
I also forgot to mention the reference to support groups. I have been to many, many of those - even now I am active in the mental health support community, but no one connects with me as a human being there either. They are also mostly drug and alcohol, no schizophrenics, no other psychotics. All the people with those diagnoses are either in jail, in state hospitals, or dead. And I might have mentioned elsewhere that people with severe mental illness do not get along with anyone, not even our own kind.
Kinda noticed when I was a kid and felt alienated by everyone no matter where I was. Family treated me terribly (except my grandma), kids bullied and ignored me. Teenage years came along and then I realized there wasn't a period in my childhood that I would describe as "happy".
So I've always known but only recently have I decided to do something about it. Once my health plan care thingywhatever gets put into place I'm gonna seek the professional help I should've gotten years ago.
Kinda noticed when I was a kid and felt alienated by everyone no matter where I was. Family treated me terribly (except my grandma), kids bullied and ignored me. Teenage years came along and then I realized there wasn't a period in my childhood that I would describe as "happy".
So I've always known but only recently have I decided to do something about it. Once my health plan care thingywhatever gets put into place I'm gonna seek the professional help I should've gotten years ago.
Good luck. It can be better. I could also say what you describe in the bolded words. I remember snapping at my therapist (in my early 40s) when he mentioned something about "joy", and I said, "I don't even know what that is supposed to feel like. The word has no meaning to me."
Happiness came to me in the later part of my life, and it came as a result of a good therapist and work to get there on my part. It's not that every day I'm bubbling over with joy now, lol, but it's not all darkness and fear anymore, and there are regular moments of happiness, enough to make it worthwhile.
I had a pretty happy childhood until age 10, when we moved to Florida. Changing schools, being small, and getting picked on regularly started then and went all the way through high school. Anxiety/Depression started around 13-14, or maybe earlier. I remember my parents taking me to a strange psychologist one day when I was around 15-16 because I had told my neighbor friend I was going to kill myself, though I never really was. I was just tired of not being able to escape my awful home life or school life. I remember feeling very embarrassed. My mother was certifiable, my brother a violent POS, and my father passive. Didn't bode well for me. Add being socially anxious and afraid of rejection (thanks to mom and lack of guidance from dad) and you have the perfect storm for deep depression and feeling like there's something wrong with you. Thats how I became an introvert. I'm convinced I could have been a charismatic extrovert without these things working against me.
I didn't start on anti-depressants until my 30's and they really didn't help much. I combined that with therapy, coaching, books, etc.
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