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Interestingly I've spent a good deal of my life lonely and invisible. Sometimes I prefer it that way. I just mainly like to have people to visit with. If that makes sense. I understand about the suicide thing. This can't possibly last forever. It's likely going to be a while though. Try to settle in and hang in there. There is surely light at the end of the tunnel.
I drink occasionally but mostly to help me sleep when my mind doesn't want to turn off.
Do you work? I work in healthcare so I get to stare death in the face each day. I'm exposed to all the folks that are exposed directly to the Covid patients. It's quite nerve wracking. Going to work each day and never knowing if it's the day you're going to get it. Or not. I try to stay focused on why I'm there and just jump in and get to it.
What do you like watching on TV?
I work in a job that isn't challenging (though well paying) in a city I detest. So the job doesn't keep my interest, at least not for a 40 hour work week. So that sucks. I've looked into hobbies such as learning guitar, another language, etc., but can't seem to keep momentum going with them.
...I go to work and home...
How's everyone else managing so far?
I can see how depressing your job can be. I hope you can compartmentalize it, meaning when you're done for the day & walking to your car to go home, you can clear your mind from work stuff & think about other stuff the rest of the day/night. I've always been able to do that. I used to be in the teaching field. Going from work, then home has been the story of my life always (so way before COVID). Here's my situation in post #22 so I don't have to copy & paste:
Interestingly I've spent a good deal of my life lonely and invisible...
What do you like watching on TV?
I know you asked him, but I LOVE TV. It's one of life's simple pleasures & at any point in my life, I'd have my list of shows I watched. I hardly watch TV as it's airing. I DVR it all & watch on my own time.
Nowadays, in no certain order I watch these, but I bolded the ones I really like:
Certain forensic shows on Investigation Discovery Channel
Certain paranormal shows on the Travel Channel
Married to Medicine
Married to Med LA The Rookie
Beat Shazam
SYTYCD (So You Think You Can Dance) Bachelor/Bachelorette
911
The Prodigal Son
Weakest Link
The Neighborhood
Bob Hearts Abishola
All Rise
World of Dance
The Resident
Mixed-Ish
Swamp Thing
Masterchef Masked Singer
I Can See Your Voice
The Coroner SWAT
For Life
60 Days In Project Runway
Superstore
A Million Little Things
The Unicorn
Evil
Hell’s Kitchen
In the Dark
There have been better shows in the past. TV isn't what it used to be. I have a few series on DVD:
I Love Lucy
90210 (original)
Melrose Place (original)
Gidget (version w/ Sally Field)
Also, I haven't counted, but I probably have about 125-50 DVD movies.
Loneliness don't bother me. I like being face to face with reality.
I forgot, who said it, one of them gurus but, it was something along those lines:
One of the signs of spiritually advancing being is its content of being alone with oneself.
I can see how depressing your job can be. I hope you can compartmentalize it, meaning when you're done for the day & walking to your car to go home, you can clear your mind from work stuff & think about other stuff the rest of the day/night. I've always been able to do that. I used to be in the teaching field. Going from work, then home has been the story of my life always (so way before COVID). Here's my situation in post #22 so I don't have to copy & paste:
I know you asked him, but I LOVE TV. It's one of life's simple pleasures & at any point in my life, I'd have my list of shows I watched. I hardly watch TV as it's airing. I DVR it all & watch on my own time.
Nowadays, in no certain order I watch these, but I bolded the ones I really like:
Certain forensic shows on Investigation Discovery Channel
Certain paranormal shows on the Travel Channel
Married to Medicine
Married to Med LA The Rookie
Beat Shazam
SYTYCD (So You Think You Can Dance) Bachelor/Bachelorette
911
The Prodigal Son
Weakest Link
The Neighborhood
Bob Hearts Abishola
All Rise
World of Dance
The Resident
Mixed-Ish
Swamp Thing
Masterchef Masked Singer
I Can See Your Voice
The Coroner SWAT
For Life
60 Days In Project Runway
Superstore
A Million Little Things
The Unicorn
Evil
Hell’s Kitchen
In the Dark
There have been better shows in the past. TV isn't what it used to be. I have a few series on DVD:
I Love Lucy
90210 (original)
Melrose Place (original)
Gidget (version w/ Sally Field)
Also, I haven't counted, but I probably have about 125-50 DVD movies.
It's difficult to compartmentalize when you're basically looking death in the face each day. I try to escape in my head when I leave. I read and watch shows and play video games and listen to music. I have free tv so I've been watching what's on there. I kind of like that Test Kitchen show.
Loneliness don't bother me. I like being face to face with reality.
I forgot, who said it, one of them gurus but, it was something along those lines:
One of the signs of spiritually advancing being is its content of being alone with oneself.
For the most part I am content. I've never experienced isolation to this degree before. I'm sure at some point I will adjust. Thank you for your response.
It's difficult to compartmentalize when you're basically looking death in the face each day. I try to escape in my head when I leave. I read and watch shows and play video games and listen to music. I have free tv so I've been watching what's on there. I kind of like that Test Kitchen show.
I completely understand about your job. It's rough, I'm sure! I have an XBox 360 that I've hardly used, but I should play video games more often too!
Just an update...I have adjusted rather well to the self isolation during this pandemic. Currently on medical leave with a broken rib. I am a hugger and that was killing me. So I came across a stuffed animal in the gift shop at work. Makes for good hugs. LOL! I don't foresee spending much time in public when or if this thing ever ends.
I'm doing ok, but in a job I can't stand and a city I can't stand. My joke is everyone experienced in 2020 what I've experienced the past decade. I've spent more than a decade in isolation through no choice of my own just because of where I live and the tragedy of my divorce in 2009. 2020 was a decent year for me. I took 2 international trips and 2 domestic ones. I got to work from home, which I loved. Isolation was nothing new.
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