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I was dating this girl for 3 months and she always seemed happy and into me. She had moved to my city months ago and started a new job and just made friends off Bumble friends.
Then the last week we were together she revealed that she hasn't been returning phone calls from friends and family.
Then she told me she had been waking up at 4:00 AM every night and not able to go back to sleep and it was "depressing", but then walked back on the depression comment.
Then our last night/morning together her personality totally changed and seemed to have an attitude, and then I got short text responses back the next few days, so I just stopped reaching out and I never heard from her again.
Whats your opinion on this? Would depression cause her to disconnect from family, friends, and relationships and would someone be able to hide it and seem happy?
I was dating this girl for 3 months and she always seemed happy and into me. She had moved to my city months ago and started a new job and just made friends off Bumble friends.
Then the last week we were together she revealed that she hasn't been returning phone calls from friends and family.
Then she told me she had been waking up at 4:00 AM every night and not able to go back to sleep and it was "depressing", but then walked back on the depression comment.
Then our last night/morning together her personality totally changed and seemed to have an attitude, and then I got short text responses back the next few days, so I just stopped reaching out and I never heard from her again.
Whats your opinion on this? Would depression cause her to disconnect from family, friends, and relationships and would someone be able to hide it and seem happy?
I was dating this girl for 3 months and she always seemed happy and into me. She had moved to my city months ago and started a new job and just made friends off Bumble friends.
Then the last week we were together she revealed that she hasn't been returning phone calls from friends and family.
Then she told me she had been waking up at 4:00 AM every night and not able to go back to sleep and it was "depressing", but then walked back on the depression comment.
Then our last night/morning together her personality totally changed and seemed to have an attitude, and then I got short text responses back the next few days, so I just stopped reaching out and I never heard from her again.
Whats your opinion on this? Would depression cause her to disconnect from family, friends, and relationships and would someone be able to hide it and seem happy?
Social Isolation is a symptom of depression. So, absolutely depression can cause a person to disconnect friends and family. They do not always know that depression is the cause. They may feel that getting ready to leave the home, and interacting with others, requires too much energy. Depressed people often report that they are tired, want to sleep, and are lacking motivation.
Since our society tends to be judgmental when it comes to what looks like laziness, they may and often do, make up excuses.,
I am NOT diagnosing depression at all. You mention that her attitude was different the last time you saw her. Depressed people can be irritable.
You also mention that she awakens at 4 AM recently. This is called "early morning awakening", and it's a symptom of depression.
If you still want her in your life, I would let her know that. I would gently ask her if she has been diagnosed with depression, and if she is being treated. If she is not being treated, I would urge her to see a qualified therapist.
Isolating ourselves is very prevalent for those of us with depression. It's always listed as a symptom of depression, both clinical and situational. I isolate because I feel like I am a drain on people. I feel like I have nothing good to offer them when I am depressed. I have zero motivation to do much of anything, much more being sociable with people. It's very unhealthy to isolate, but also hard to break free of the desire to isolate. I generally also feel very alone when isolating, but it is hard to reach out to others. If your friend feels this way, it was very likely worse than she admitted. Oh, irritability can also be a symptom of depression.
I was dating this girl for 3 months and she always seemed happy and into me. She had moved to my city months ago and started a new job and just made friends off Bumble friends.
Then the last week we were together she revealed that she hasn't been returning phone calls from friends and family.
Then she told me she had been waking up at 4:00 AM every night and not able to go back to sleep and it was "depressing", but then walked back on the depression comment.
Then our last night/morning together her personality totally changed and seemed to have an attitude, and then I got short text responses back the next few days, so I just stopped reaching out and I never heard from her again.
Whats your opinion on this? Would depression cause her to disconnect from family, friends, and relationships and would someone be able to hide it and seem happy?
Yes. BTDT. Depression can be insidious...it can creep up on someone. It usually doesn't just happen all at once. The person may be able to mask it by appearing "happy" for quite a while, but if the underlying issues leading to their depression aren't dealt with, eventually they can't keep up the facade. Depression doesn't just make someone appear sad, it also saps energy and motivation. Normal things become insurmountable. Keeping in contact with people you normally would no longer seems worth the effort. Some people sleep more, others less. IME I often felt tired and sleepy during the day when I should be energized, but wide awake late at night or early in the morning even though I was physically exhausted. I also had a short fuse. Things that normally wouldn't bother me became unbearable.
No telling why this girl stopped communicating with you. Depression might be in the background but maybe other things in her life changed significantly and your relationship went by the wayside.
Last edited by Parnassia; 04-06-2022 at 01:19 PM..
Yes to all of it. I suggest reading about depression, its symptoms and effect on people who suffer from it, etc. No doubt this woman isn't going to be (or isn't, even if you don't know it) the only person you'll ever meet with depression, and it's good to understand the basics of what depression is and what people who have it are going through.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Parnassia
The person may be able to mask it by appearing "happy" for quite a while, but if the underlying issues leading to their depression aren't dealt with, eventually they can't keep up the facade.
Or, the attempts to hide it (or inability to do so fully) may make them seem like a "Debbie Downer"/"negative," or reclusive/antisocial, or sullen/with a bad attitude, or wounded, or unmotivated, or in some other fashion they may exude vibes of being "off." People might not associate this with depression... they might just think, "oh what an unpleasant/awkward person."
Depression can certainly cause you to disconnect from family, friends, and relationships. When you're depressed, it's hard to find the energy or motivation to connect with others. You may feel like you're a burden to them, or that they can't possibly understand what you're going through. Depression can also lead to social isolation, which can further worsen your condition.
a depressed person has lost interest in many earthly pursuits,.so there is no reason to connect with anyone,as there is no common interest to share anymore.
do you really want to hear about their day to day routines,troubles ?
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