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Add to that the resulting vague dissatisfaction with your own life after seeing others' idealized lives on social media... I swore I'd never have home Internet, but was forced to in order to WFH during the pandemic. I should get rid of it, but now find that I'm somewhat addicted. My worst nightmare! It leaves me totally enervated.
This is an excellent point. What we see of other people's lives is carefully curated to seem far, FAR better than it generally is. And it is a way to preen before the world about how great you are and, by extension, how un-great everyone else is, but if you become a "follower" or buy some product, maybe some of the excellence of this personality will rub off on you, etc.
Another factor is news (newstainment, really, ask any (likely former) journalist and they will tell you that is what it really is anymore). Newstainment is just a big outrage generating machine. On Twitter, aka "the hellsite", this goes on a lot too. You see a lot of posts like "give me a like if you think [insert name of hated politician or entertainer here] is a terrible human being". If you agree with me I will follow you [i.e., increase your social capital on the site]". It is just people forming roving gangs of yes-people and low-grade trolls. Forming tribal associations that are largely mindless.
I still find some value in the platform -- understanding the roiling stew of public opinion and "news" feeds including some pretty good alternative journalism sources, connecting with others to be Voices of Reason where possible. But you have to be basically immune to the enticements of social media and consume it passively. You know that you have gotten to this goal if you can just shut it off at will, for days if you wish, and not feel deprived or some need to, e.g, log onto the site at 10 pm when you should really be winding down for a good night's sleep, etc. Not everyone can do this. I am very much not an addictive personality and am slightly neurodiverse so it's pretty easy for me. I feel the pull a little bit but it's easy to resist.
Yes. The news is so depressing so I just scan it and only click on a couple articles.
After checking C-D, it's You-Tube videos on travel or nature or cooking. The documentaries are so helpful when exercising, to keep my attention and make the time go past. I try to learn something each day and not just be mindlessly entertained (that's for streaming at night).
It does create "vague feelings of dissatisfaction", I agree. I equate it to "not knowing you were poor growing up" as I had no idea of other's retirement situations until I was on C-D, and read all the "millionaire" posts.
If I had my former hobbies, I wouldn't be online much at all. So I'm trying to figure that out---new hobbies besides being online! At least I've avoided all other social media besides this.
I keep the laptop on all day with tabs open, so it probably looks like I'm on various sites all day, but I might just be reading Kindle on the laptop too, which I do everyday.
This is an excellent point. What we see of other people's lives is carefully curated to seem far, FAR better than it generally is. And it is a way to preen before the world about how great you are and, by extension, how un-great everyone else is, but if you become a "follower" or buy some product, maybe some of the excellence of this personality will rub off on you, etc.
Another factor is news (newstainment, really, ask any (likely former) journalist and they will tell you that is what it really is anymore). Newstainment is just a big outrage generating machine. On Twitter, aka "the hellsite", this goes on a lot too. You see a lot of posts like "give me a like if you think [insert name of hated politician or entertainer here] is a terrible human being". If you agree with me I will follow you [i.e., increase your social capital on the site]". It is just people forming roving gangs of yes-people and low-grade trolls. Forming tribal associations that are largely mindless.
I still find some value in the platform -- understanding the roiling stew of public opinion and "news" feeds including some pretty good alternative journalism sources, connecting with others to be Voices of Reason where possible. But you have to be basically immune to the enticements of social media and consume it passively. You know that you have gotten to this goal if you can just shut it off at will, for days if you wish, and not feel deprived or some need to, e.g, log onto the site at 10 pm when you should really be winding down for a good night's sleep, etc. Not everyone can do this. I am very much not an addictive personality and am slightly neurodiverse so it's pretty easy for me. I feel the pull a little bit but it's easy to resist.
I take wee breaks from social media every once in a while just to refocus and recalibrate or whatever it’s called.
My new laptop informs me once a week how much time I'm spending online. It was 8 hours a day -- yikes! I've gotten it down to 6, but that's just a start. Eventually I'd like to limit it to 2 hours a day or less.
I do use website blockers. I have a free one on my phone called Liberate, and one called Freedom on both my home and work computers. It has a free version but I pay $29 a year for the upgraded version. I use it mainly to block this site. It helps, but sometimes, like yesterday, once it unlocks I stay on for too long. Yesterday it unlocked at 7am and I didn't block it again until 7pm. It's hard! It doesn't work on apps like my News app, so I delete it from my phone so I have to at least add the extra step of having to re-download it from the app store instead of just opening it mindlessly.
Yes. The news is so depressing so I just scan it and only click on a couple articles.
After checking C-D, it's You-Tube videos on travel or nature or cooking. The documentaries are so helpful when exercising, to keep my attention and make the time go past. I try to learn something each day and not just be mindlessly entertained (that's for streaming at night).
It does create "vague feelings of dissatisfaction", I agree. I equate it to "not knowing you were poor growing up" as I had no idea of other's retirement situations until I was on C-D, and read all the "millionaire" posts.
If I had my former hobbies, I wouldn't be online much at all. So I'm trying to figure that out---new hobbies besides being online! At least I've avoided all other social media besides this.
I keep the laptop on all day with tabs open, so it probably looks like I'm on various sites all day, but I might just be reading Kindle on the laptop too, which I do everyday.
This psychotherapist's reaction to this prescient song "Internet" by Bo Burnham, breaks down a lot of what you may be feeling. I'm sure you'll 'find' something to relate to. Warning, there is some language some may find offensive.
Sometimes I think the worst thing I ever did was let my ex hand me a laptop so I'd stop running upstairs to check email during commercials - 20 years ago
3 laptops and 2 ipads later.....
I've removed most apps from my phone though
It's definitely a time suck and I have things I need to research etc that I don't even get done, despite spending a lot of non-work time with a laptop sweating my legs.
I do try and read more though - that is one of the things that really took a hit to internet time
Last edited by WouldLoveTo; 05-22-2022 at 07:43 PM..
I'm online quite a bit and don't let it bother me too much. My wife has hip and back problems where she can't stand more than 5 or 10 minutes without hurting. So she's on just about all the time. But some of hers is productive. She works on her geneology and verifying names on the 1950 census on family search. I'm big on mainly Facebook and C-D, plus my online crossword puzzles and youtube. I know I'm on too much. But I get done what needs to be done. All the laundry is done, dishes are washed, we had a good supper, and tomorrow I need to vacuum.
This psychotherapist's reaction to this prescient song "Internet" by Bo Burnham, breaks down a lot of what you may be feeling. I'm sure you'll 'find' something to relate to. Warning, there is some language some may find offensive.
I spent a lot (too much) of today online. First here. Then my Newsfeed (which leads to more and more stories) Then here again. I felt pretty good this morning, got enough sleep etc. Now I feel like I’m in a fog, even a state of inertia. I find it hard to rejoin the physical world in a way after I’ve spent hours on my phone or computer. Part of it is a lot of the stories on my news feed left me feeling angry and depressed, but I also think there’s a temporary physical effect from spending a lot of time online. Almost like a hangover. Can anyone relate?
Yes. I have to make myself get up and walk away, but as a caregiver, sometimes that happens for me. I try to walk for 45 minutes to an hour on nice days. Also, the Internet can be an escape from reality, which I do need right now.
There are still better things I could do with my time. I used to write a lot, not just posts on a forum, but short stories, articles, and I am about 30,000 pages into a novel. I lost my heart for it for some reason, and sometimes I think if I got back to it, I wouldn't waste so much of my life on here.
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