Cultural Question: Why do Non-Hispanic Americans Get offended by Hugs & Kisses as Greetings? (Miami: how much, vs)

[Alex =]]

Originally Posted by MiamiRob

We hispanic have a different culture when it comes to greetings. Kissing a women the first time meeting? No! but aquaintances & friends is normal and the same thing goes for guys where we hug each other and think nothing of it. Ironically black men do half hugs when they greet each other too. The most people I find who don't appreciate this type of greetings are usually white anglos who tend to prefer a much more formal greeting such as a handshake.

I rarely..very rarely see a U.S. American of British ancestry in Miami, those who look "Anglo" are the British tourists I see when I go to Miami beach.

Spanish speaking Americans (Cubans, Argentines, Chileans, etc) all have different cultures, even within each country they have different culture and traditions according to their ancestry.

The U.S. is the most multiethnic mixed country of the world and people here talks pretending there is an "Anglo" culture here. please... British people are genetically and culturally different than U.S. Americans.

apples and lemons.

There is not a common culture in the U.S. population.

Miami is by far one of the most vibrant and modern cities in the U.S.

[InternetWhiteKnight]

Honestly, I think some folks consider it disingenuous. I mean, you're doing something usually reserved for close friends and family upon first introduction.

That said, I don't mind it and I've gotten used to doing it from being here so long, but it can be awkward when in another part of the country.

[InternetWhiteKnight]

Originally Posted by Oleg Bach

Because anglos still have this Victorian thing that intimacy is some how a show of weakness. They really don't have much culture. You can win them over...if you don't over do it...actually growing up in a non-anglo home...we were not afraid of touch...I get a mischievous kick out of embracing cold types and feeling them squirm....Also some equate intimate contact as being homosexual or something...There was a standing joke in my family...My eldest son was from my wive's first marriage. Anglo back ground....I used to and still to hug him and say "scream when you start to feel gay" - we laugh when I pull this on him as an adult. It's about being secure in who you are also...besides big scary bikers do it...that must make it okay....

That's kind of ironic, considering heterosexual Latin men can be some of the most homophobic types out there.

[Cubanchic]

I am Cuban but raised in a very Midwestern culture, went to Europe and I had a problem with the whole cheak kiss and fake huggie, when I first encounter it. Guess what I got over it! What I now know from dealing with a lot of foreign business, is to expect it.

As someone that did a lot of work with a lot of diffrent cultures, you learn. Asians have a thing about that whole hugging thing as well as Midwesterners, adjust.

I have dealt with all of Latin America , the eastern and western, Europeans, the Russians, and the mid west, Americans. The most difficult for me were Latin American Asians, I really had to learn them.

[unclealbertt]

Originally Posted by kmarc

mmigrants are frequently homesick and disoriented in the US, this is not as happy a place for them as you'd think, which should be obvious by now. Most often the reason for being here is purely economic. For whatever reason, they can't go home, so they try to re-create the conditions of their homeland and it really doesn't work out for them. Gone are the days of the immigrants happy to be here, the prevailing sentiment is resentment, if anything the Boston tragedy should have taught us that.

Is that what Rush is up to now? This is pure derangement! LOL

[sjnative]

Originally Posted by Oleg Bach

Because anglos still have this Victorian thing that intimacy is some how a show of weakness. They really don't have much culture. You can win them over...if you don't over do it...actually growing up in a non-anglo home...we were not afraid of touch...I get a mischievous kick out of embracing cold types and feeling them squirm....Also some equate intimate contact as being homosexual or something...There was a standing joke in my family...My eldest son was from my wive's first marriage. Anglo back ground....I used to and still to hug him and say "scream when you start to feel gay" - we laugh when I pull this on him as an adult. It's about being secure in who you are also...besides big scary bikers do it...that must make it okay....

Wow.

Maybe someone would like to tell me why hispanics are cultural supremacists and why they take sleazy pleasure in violating other people's boundaries.

This is really disgusting and painfully revelatory of a culture that just has no standards.

This alone tells you why white flight has happened, continues to happen and will continue further as the demography of chauvinism and sleaziness continues to ghettify the major cities along the southern border of the United States- and to do it with pride.

[windowbronzer]

I don't get offended but it's not expected in a lot of other cultures so it's a bit of a shock.

If I'm close to you I could care less. I've noticed White-Americans hug quite a lot. Black Americans engage in a lot of small touch (hand shaking, guiding, etc) and only hugging/kissing for bigger events, not just simple greetings. Arab men I've met have been very friendly, often hugging each other. Asian women I know hold hands and hug with their male friends. Other groups are touchy-feely as well, but it just depends on the context and time/place it happens. People in the North seem far less touchy to me. People in the South or deep mountains/country areas seem almost too touchy at times. Best advice:Just out of respect for peoples space, I think it's best to let the person become comfortable with you before leaning n an given kisses....and hang out with people who are willing to understand your culture.

And as far as "they should be use to it by now" comment... no, no they shouldn't. People grow up in different cultures, different families, and have different personal history. Just because theres a high Hispanic population doesn't mean some has assimilated into it or even that they must assimilate. Most people dont have an issue altering a bt to fit a new culture, but with everything, they have to be preped first. Don't expect everyone to have the same standards as you.

[miami_zed]

Just give up. Just do it. Get used to feeling awkward. Because thats Miami.

There are so many kinds of people here that I do not know how to greet each one. Hugs, kisses, handshakes, bro hug, no greeting just start talking, elbow touch, fist, smile, head nod, what's up? good. It doesn't matter how people look like or how you think they are, they will always surprise you.

[Uptownfe]

I am from the Midwest and the majority of us do not hug one another, much less kiss! In fact, growing up, I think I can count on one hand the number of times my parents even held hands in front of us kids. They didn't kiss or show PDA, certainly! I am uncomfortable with PDA from others in public. If some guy came up to me and kissed me on the cheek and he was just an acquaintance I wouldn't slap him but I would feel offended. Midwesterners tend to have a bubble of personal space around us that extends out about three feet in all directions. If you breach that bubble as anything less than a boyfriend/girlfriend or husband/wife expect us to react in a negative way.

Why? Well, if you grew up with your own space, doing your own thing, and no one was every touchy-feely around you - why not? It's just our comfort zone, that's all.

[miamihurricane555]

Originally Posted by miami_zed

Just give up. Just do it. Get used to feeling awkward. Because thats Miami.

There are so many kinds of people here that I do not know how to greet each one. Hugs, kisses, handshakes, bro hug, no greeting just start talking, elbow touch, fist, smile, head nod, what's up? good. It doesn't matter how people look like or how you think they are, they will always surprise you.

so true! I have the hardest time figuring out who is a white hispanic(which are the majority) and who is anglo white, and it makes it mission impossible to figure out how to greet someone.