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Anytime there is diversity there will also be racism. You can't have one without the other, that's just the way it is. If you can't handle being around racism, move somewhere where everyone looks like yourself (if you can find a place like that). This whole idea of many races living together in harmony is a fantasy, it will never happen. It's human nature for people to form groups of others like themselves, just go to any high school lunchroom and you will see what I mean.
naturelover, you've been in Mississippi too long. Believe me, it is very possible, even desirable, to live in a diverse environment without conflict, hatefulness, anger, distrust, racism, etc. As a teacher for thirty plus years, I've been in a few "high school lunchrooms." Some students do choose to sit with others of similar backgrounds (which certainly is not a sign of racism or conflict). Others hang out with friends of other backgrounds---and enjoy the differences. God intended for all races to live TOGETHER in peace and harmony, and some of us are fortunate enough to follow his plan.
Mississippi is straight up weird. There are TONS of mixed race babies AND adults running around ... always have been. They used to ... and sometimes still do ... use that old practice of .... "sending the baby down to Aunt Jesse (when a white woman gives birth to a black child) ... and quietly give her some money every month" still goes one.
On the other hand, you can drive down to the Bucket of Blood section of Jackson and other little towns on a Friday night and all you'll see are white crack prostitutes walking the streets of the Black Buttermilk Bottom.
Dis' heah is America! We are sooooo full of it! My mother was from Mississippi and I spent 7 days in Mississippi last Christmas. That's what the book should be named ... "Seven Days In Mississippi."
EVERYTHING was happening. It's 2008 everywhere, right? Well, sitting in one cafe ... scenes from 1922, 2008, 1968, aNd 1840 came to life in front of my face one afternoon ... ALL AT THE SAME TIME.
Amazing. As a black man, I felt the healing power of old black culture, was sadden by how some of more disadvantaged medicated their pain by being VERY busy doing some of EVERYTHING ... fell in line with "just giving up and writing off white people" because frankly ... you just get tired of dealing with Neaderthals ... and until a white person shows you that they are open to dealing with you as another human being, I too saw the sodbuster as just another piece of the wall. Sick of it. Confederate flags when their lives are clearly disfunctional and their souls are starving ... just tired of the foolishness.
On the other hand, it was the black Mississippians who surprised me at how they went out of their way to be open and protective of those whites who had been supportive in one way or another over the years.
Mississippi is weird. I'm from California, and they wouldn't let me even show anger towards a white man I clearly felt needed busting in the mouth. Weird. They weren't afraid or being Uncle Toms ... I just saw they had a ... um ... broader humanity ... heart for ... things Southern. Their way of seeing things was different.
I lived in Atlanta, GA in the early 80s where I learned that white Southerners and Black Southerners have more in common with each other than I would ever have with either of them. The country is still very regional and the value systems are often subtle.
Don't worry about being interracial. It ain't nothing new. Just don't trip. Refuse to see any dunderhead who is trying to make you miserable simply because he or she is miserable. That's the nutshell of it anyway. Wherever you go, the same rule applies: "Those who can't create love, create drama."
The majority of both white and black folk down there are living in the year of 2008. The rest? After about a month or so, you won't see them either. Take the job, have fun, and grow some tomatoes in January.
If you've ever had the opportunity to watch children of young ages together, the only thing they pay attention is the desire to play. It is only when they grow older, have heard direct and indirect messages from their elder folk about who to associate with that they begin to segue' into thier own comfortable little groups.
In highschool when I left a catholic school for a public school that was populated by Latino Americans, I remember my aunt saying "now, watch out for those mexicans, they'll cut you!" and she laughed, but that has never left my mind, yet for the 3 years I attended I never saw a knife fight, or heard of one. Surprisingly, too, many blacks, whites, and latinos became close friends.
veganwriter, I'll say this, white Mississippians often have what I call DOUBLE-THINK about race. You also have three distinct kinds of people, mostly categorized by age (but not always. You can find racist 20-somethings and deeply enlightened 80-year-olds). Here's how it generally breaks down:
The older someone is, from about 80 to 40, the more ingrained racism they have. This is because they were raised in a different era and most went to segregated schools and some even bounced on the knee of their grandpappy who owned slaves back before the war. They may feel that interracial marriage is somehow "wrong" and they may feel uncomfortable around blacks. Some are even Klan holdouts -- but I've never known anyone under 70 who was an out and proud Klansman.
People from about 40 to 20 grew up after the Civil Rights movement, went to integrated schools, and are a bit more mellow about race. Some resent blacks and don't want to be around them. Others have black friends and date or marry interracially. Most grew up with at least mildly racist parents and may or may not carry some feelings of superiority to blacks.
Kids younger than 20 seem to be the most comfortable. They grew up in mixed schools and have a hard time imagining anything different. I have a lot of hope for them.
Now here's where that DOUBLE-THINK I mentioned comes in. Double-think, as George Orwell described it, is holding two contrary opinions at once. A lot of whites have double-think. They may claim there's not a racist bone in their body, but use nasty language when talking about blacks. They marry blacks, have half-black babies, and still feel somewhere deep inside that whites are superior to blacks. This has been going on as long as I know. Back in the day, you'd be hard-pressed to find a Klucker that didn't have a black girlfriend and six or seven mixed babies hidden away somewhere. It's like one side of our brains HATES black, and the other side LOVES them, and the two sides cannot be reconciled. I don't know what to do about it.
Race in the Deep South has always been complicated. A lot of whites have black ancestry, and did everything they could to hide it. Some of my ancestors were mulatto, and it's definately not something my aunts like to dwell on. The tactic for decades was DENY DENY DENY. But a lot of blacks have white blood, and they seem to do just fine, so I think we should just get over ourselves.
Mississippienne, I think what we have here is a broad sociological statement rather than a mindset completely specific to Mississippi. And while I appreciate the concepts you've described, at 51, I and most of the people I know don't exactly fit into the age brackets or the mindset outlined above. We were born during desegregation, we were some of the first to be involved in busing, we lived through Jackson State, we remember James Meredith, we remember separate water fountains and bathrooms, the back of the bus, and the turmoil that surrounded the NATION during desegregation. I wasn't raised in the same era as my father, who is 75, and my views and most of my classmates' views, are completely different than his. I think these estimates are about 10 years off and certainly are not binding, as mentioned...the estimates are even further off for people whose grandparents owned slaves. We'd be hard pressed to find those people still living since the Civil War started 147 years ago.
Be that as it may, double-think is not indigenous to Mississippi. Although racism is very much alive and well everywhere, I really think we do an injustice to everyone if we continue to revisit the past and make it relevant to the present. People are people, regardless of age, regardless of background. History always has a bearing on any region, but the Misssissippi of today is a far cry from the Mississippi of 1861, or even 1961. At least that's how it looks from my window on the world...
There were indeed people who still remembered slavery living as late as the 1940s and 1950s. My great-grandfather was born in 1860 and died in 1948, when his grandson, my father, was eight-years-old. In any case, the years immediately following slavery were pretty terrible for blacks, what with lynchings and such.
No, I don't think double-think is unique to Mississippi, we live in a racist nation. I think we're slowly recovering but it'll take awhile. I've been on this forum for months telling people, "It's 2008, not 1960" over and over. People would LOVE to think the USA's problems with racism are confined to MS. A lot of folks would LOVE to believe that MS is a malignant tumor that needs to be cut off. That's not true. I'm not even sure the racism is the worst here, I've had blacks tell me they had harder times in the North and Midwest. There's no harm in discussing this -- the harm is when people are too afraid to talk, and let hurts fester and misinformation rule.
As for the racism of middle-aged people, I take my mother and her friends as an example. My mother's 53, vividly remembers the first time black children came to her school, and still has double-think. And she's part black! It's kind of sad. To be fair, one of her friends is equally racist -- and she's from Hawaii, not MS.
Racism is alive and well. But its kept to private company. Most won't say anything to your face or even give you any bad looks in particular... but in the back offices and in homes its still "that stupid n---- this and that".
I moved to MS from Maryland and was pleasantly surprised that its not the bad place you see in the movies. Most people are quite nice.
The coast is the most liberal/tolerant place in the state. I lived there, Meridian and Hattiesburg and prefered the coast by far - even though my apartment was destroyed in the Hurricane. I've since moved back to Washington DC area and really miss Long Beach MS... but its just a shell of its former self... its too depressing for me to go back.
Good luck in your move - you'll be fine. It takes good people to change attitudes.
Anytime there is diversity there will also be racism. You can't have one without the other, that's just the way it is. If you can't handle being around racism, move somewhere where everyone looks like yourself (if you can find a place like that). This whole idea of many races living together in harmony is a fantasy, it will never happen. It's human nature for people to form groups of others like themselves, just go to any high school lunchroom and you will see what I mean.
The lines your drawing are usually lines of behavior, not race per se. There will be conflict anytime people act in opposing fashion - I see it even here in DC where the Hispanic community is reviled, as it is in many major cities now. They act totally different than "whites". They unabashedly stare at women (my wife complains about this all the time), they seem dirty, you notice them in connection with crime... in groups they are obnoxious. These aren't racially specific qualities. However, in DC, there is thankfully a VERY STARK contrast! Indian immigrants are mostly well liked. They are mild mannered, hard working, and exceptionally rarely will you find an ill temper. Their children are often among the MOST disciplined and excel in school. Most white people here will still make fun of their accent, but its good natured. Comments about hispanics are anything but.
It just goes to show you its not race itself that most people have a problem with, its behavior. Undesireable behaviors have become associated with race. I personally can't stand obnoxious, show boating people - white, black, or whatever... but I admit I associate show boating more with blacks than any other race.
IMO, It's a fine line that many confuse. Hating someone or treating them differently solely because they are a different race... THATS racism. Most people are not racist - they don't like specific behavior from anyone - and experience has led them to associate those behaviors with race.
I Am A Biracial Young Lady Black/white From California. I Moved To Tn In 2000 And Work In The Desoto Area. I Am Fair Skinned ,green Eyes And Dark Curly Hair. I Think It's Obvious I'm Not White But I Have Had A Older Lady (customer) In Southaven,ms Go On And On About How The "blacks" Were Bringing Down The City. I Stood There And Just Listened In Amazement. Never In My Life Did I Think I Would Have The Chance To Listen To A White Person Speak Freely About How They Felt About Blacks Thinking I Was "one Of Them-white." I Mean Half Of Me Is White But Still Think Its Just Crazy How A Single Race Black Or White Ect Can Be Made Into A Blanket Statement/sterotyped. The People On The Most Part Are Very Nice Here White And Black. I Think You'll Be Fine Out Here. I Love It Because The Cost Of Living Is Cheap And If That Means Having To Hear A Racial Comment Here And There..hey I'll Get Over It Because There Are Racist Everywhere
Looking at the date you posted, she probably felt much more free to comment after seeing Obama's pastor's on the tube so much.
And being from Mississippi for 48 years, I can understand her statements. I know what she was trying to say. That when people of different ethnic backgrounds, or people with a hud check, (or people who cannot afford the upkeep on their home) move into neighborhoods that have families whose biggest investment is their home, and then the families who cannot afford the upkeep of their home, let multiple relatives move in, pile up non-working vehicles in the yard, let their kids and family members listen to loud and vulgar music so that the neighbors can hear, and who just have a totally different set of family values (unwed mothers, multiple children with multiple fathers, who roam the street with their pants hanging down) and the neighborhood's property values plummet before they can sell their homes, I can understand her fear.
I see my mom's home, which she worked hard to pay for, after my dad and she were divorced and she was left with 4 kids to raise, with no government help or any finances from our dad, decreasing in value because the new neighbors just have a totally different lifestyle, that doesn't contribute to the well being of the community. I can understand the anger.
I do have friends, and I mean real friends, who we are in each other's homes, worship together, travel together, shop together, who are of different ethnic backgrounds, who have the same values that most working, middle class americans have. (Marriage, no divorce, (hey, at least they try) no sex outside of marriage, no drugs or alcohol, education as a priority, worship of the God of the Bible, etc.) (And....Not just the 'I have a black friend' comment, but for real friends of different ethnicities) And they have fears too. Their neighborhood homes are decreasing in value too. Their children are being influenced by the main stream entertainment industry. Are being led down the path that leads to an unsuccessful life. Are still voting for people who's politics only prosper if people are dependent on them, therefore nothing ever changes and poverty increases. Class warfare is the underlying factor of every election. etc.
At least the conversation has opened up. My only fear is that the conversation will lead to anarchy and chaos. And since the news media loves to play devils advocate, and their profit relies on who is the most 'entertaining', no real truth is ever revealed to the masses. It hurts too bad. And the truth won't make money until the lies are exposed and brought down, which hurts financially for a while also. Oh well. We can pray, and talk without offense taken. Hopefully.
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