Interracial Lesbian Couple with a child moving to MS from Southern California - are we crazy??? (Jackson: to rent, crime)

[Muhnay]

Originally Posted by kvnbu

I would really like to thank all of you all for weighing in. After reading the posts, it appears that, in many ways, it will be a lot like living here in that:
1) there will always be ignorant people who believe that what they believe is what should be believed
2) there is some level of corruption in about every police force (reference to the officer who thinks that the Klan is an effective regulating body),
3) kids are cruel (so what else is new)
And lastly
4) There are folks who have so little to think about, that they will make us the center of their conversation (although, I suspect that most folks are way to busy for this, and we will be a passing fad - and for those who aren't busy, they're likely to send us a Christmas card : )

However, just like here, so many of you seem to be warm, kind, and caring, - so much so that you would take time out to consider the concerns of a stranger. Again, a lot like here. I suppose that if that's how it is, Mississippi is likely to be a place that (after a time, and some adjustment for us and our neighbors to be) that one day my family and I will proudly call home.

My most sincere and deepest thanks,

Kvnbu

I have a question.. Are you both currently married under a state that recognizes gay marriage? I don't think Mississippi does, so I don't know what the legal ramifications maybe on your marriage, and your kid... just something to consider.

Oh one other thing.. schools in Mississippi lack much from the Jr. High/middle school level up.. but the elementary level is fantastic.. or at least that was what we discovered while living in Gulfport. One other thing to think about with a child in the picture.

[southernbliss]

Posted by Muhnay,

From an outsider who lived in Mississippi's Gulf coast... They may smile to your face, but you will be the talk of the town, and some may resent your being there, and make life a bit uneasy for you. Mississippi is Bible belt country, and gay is gay, and then there is the whole interracial thing.. a big no no out south. So you already have 2 strikes against you. I was on the coast where things are a bit more open and easy going.. they are more accepting of different life styles.. but as one officer told me.. don't worry we have the klan down here.. sooner or later they'll get theirs. How serious he was I don't know.. but it is a true statement. You may find the child protective service breathing down your neck, you may not. I met many gay women and men on the coast, they work in the casinos, and waffle houses there. They seemed fine.. but most I saw were white with white.. all nice people mind you.. but even they would tell me of local harassment from time to time.

Mississippi is an odd place, I think just about anyone can make a life for themselves there if they really want too.. we all have our cross to bare. So I would not give up if it is some place you really want to call home, just be prepared for the worst, and hope for the best. Good luck, and Welcome to Mississippi.. its like going home.



Thanks you took the words right out of my mouth!!!
Moderator cut: no vulgarity here please

[NWS]

Keep in touch kvnbu.
Let us know how you are doing with the move and adjustment.
Clinton is a great town. You will be fine.

[Pamela50]

In a certain way I disagree southernbliss. I too am an outsider in that for the first 32 yrs of my life I lived 30 miles south of chicago..and the last 17yrs here in Philadelphia Ms (site of mississippi burning movie).
First mmm maybe 5-6 yrs I thought it was that way also but as I watched and interacted closer within the womens circles here...I found no difference except that here ppl are a bit more vocal about what "their" values are. In the north..the feelings are there esp in the very strong catholic area I was from..but difference was they hid it for the political correctness and because to be self aware was the "in" thing. To me, their way is much more dangerous as they remain ignorant about the subjects and interactions on a more open basis.
I think the open approach, opens the avenue atleast for conversation to hopefully make ppl more aware.
I thought when I moved here I would be disgusted by the racism because I thought by all what I heard it was much worse here..believe me, Joliet Illinois is far more racist than Philadelphia Ms is and that is saying something. The racism in Joliet, Il is both sides and is very hostile both verbally in some cases and physically.
The south, has received much education, publicity and public speakers since the aweful tragedy of the civil rights workers. Not saying the elderly still arent bit uneducated on the choice of words for sure but both sides seem to live together more peacefully here.
I noticed the difference in the work place first of course. I worked as a nurse. Races worked side by side..ate lunch together with a feeling of normal instead of the feeling of hostility that stewed underneath in Joliet where I worked.
Not saying there cant be improvement but hell I am sure many ppl talk behind my back too but hey..they arent my family or my friends so who cares lol.
Ms is an absolute gorgeous lovely place to live. Ppl here love to laugh,love and hell ya eat

[aiangel_writer]

Frist and foremost, I must say THANK YOU PAMELA, for giving our state such accolades.

We have come very far since the 60's and I think that most who come here can see and realize that.

I believe attitude of the new person plays a large role in how they are accepted and treated. If one comes here friendly and accepting of us Southerners, he/she will find that they are accepted more easily.

We are a very polite and friendly people, and yes we do tend to speak our minds, but that as another poster said can be a very good thing.

I have a best friend who is gay and who moved to Texas after graduating high school. HE was so afraid of how we, his friends would feel towards him so he never mentioned it or came home often. A couple of years ago, I brought the subject up to him, he was very shocked that we all knew, LOL, but seemed even more shocked that our feelings towards him had not changed one bit. And HE was from here!

So, come with an open mind, know up front that people are curious of any newcomer, and will ply you with many questions, some that you might even deem personal, but it is a natural curiousity of so many of us.

I hope you find that after the intiial gossip things will settle down quite quickly and you will soon be making friends.

[jstring0704]

First of all I have lived in MS most of my life and Ms is a very friendly state compared to alot of other states I've visited. As far as you and your partner, there should be nothing that you two should have to worry about too much. I'm saying this because me and my parent lived together in Jackson,Ms. Clinton, MS is not that far from Jackson. If you are planning on buying a home in clinton and need information on certain neighborhoods, feel free to email me and I'll try and help as much as possible.


Moderator cut: no private e mails , please

[kvnbu]

Originally Posted by Muhnay

I have a question.. Are you both currently married under a state that recognizes gay marriage? I don't think Mississippi does, so I don't know what the legal ramifications maybe on your marriage, and your kid... just something to consider.

Oh one other thing.. schools in Mississippi lack much from the Jr. High/middle school level up.. but the elementary level is fantastic.. or at least that was what we discovered while living in Gulfport. One other thing to think about with a child in the picture.

California is currently a state that recognizes gay marriage. However, although we've been together for a bit over 8 years, we have not yet married. That said, we are likely to prior to moving.

Regards,

Kvnbu

[onethatsbroken]

Meridian area here KVNBU if anything I think that everyone needs a little change every now and then... This includes the whole state.... I hope that you will stand up for your opionion and your values . Yes there are people out there that can be cruel and inconsiderate... But from my point of view there are always 1,000 people to stand behind you, versues that one stupid person judging you... I hope that you do come here to live. It really is a nice state. We all hope to hear of things going well for you...

"Don't look down on someone, unless you are helping them up."

[tracyalexa]

I am from Boston (and straight) and have lived in Southaven MS for the past 5 years. I have yet to see a lesbian couple (or assumed to be) walking around Walmart (the center of the universe here). And if you happen to be a lesbian couple / or suspected of being one, you are usually the talk of the town. People here have VERY strong beliefs and aren't afraid to let you know what they are - whether you care to hear it or not. BUT they will smile at you and then talk about how your going to hell as soon as you walk away. Being from Boston and dealing with this, is very strange to me. I am used to more upfront people.

Now, all that said, there is an area of Memphis that is quite accepting and GLT friendly. I am not sure where Clinton is, but if it's anything at all like what I've seen, good luck!

[NWS]

Originally Posted by tracyalexa

...People here have VERY strong beliefs and aren't afraid to let you know what they are - whether you care to hear it or not. BUT they will smile at you and then talk about how your going to hell as soon as you walk away. Being from Boston and dealing with this, is very strange to me. I am used to more upfront people...

Are we talking about two types of people here?
If so I've met the first type but it wasn't negative. I have noticed
people here love to talk about religion more than I've ever experienced. I've been here 3 months and I've been invited to 3-4 churches or religious gatherings. They do love to talk about god and share that with you. Although I'm not much into organized religion, I felt good that they would invite me.
I haven't had anyone share anything I found negative yet but it's only been 3 months.
As far as smiling in my face and condemning me to hell behind my back,
isn't that better than the alternative? I'm not GLT but if I were I really wouldn't care what anyone thought. I really don't want you to be upfront with me about your dislike of me. So if the choice is snear at me and go talk behind my back or smile at me and go talk behind my back, I would rather the smile.
Why do you want people to be upfront with you and let you know they don't like you? That gives them too much power I think. It suggests to them you care what they think. If they want to say something positive great if it's negative I don't want to know about it.