07-24-2007, 05:18 PM
Location: Branson-Hollister-Kimberling City-Blue Eye-Ridgedale
1,814 posts, read
5,381,231 times
Reputation: 1589
Last edited by Lake Junkie; 07-24-2007 at 05:26 PM ..
07-24-2007, 05:20 PM
Location: Moved to town. Miss 'my' woods and critters.
25,464 posts, read
13,571,982 times
Reputation: 31765
Who me??????
07-24-2007, 05:26 PM
2,896 posts, read
6,633,478 times
Reputation: 5054
Quote:
Originally Posted by
mrsgenealogy
Ohhhh! These are some real "groaners", you guys!
I must admit to LOLISOM a few times, though!!!
Hahaha!
Get it? LOLISOM? I won't explain it unless no one gets it. I just made it up but I bet several of you will "get it" because of the context in which it was said.
Hint! Hint!
Btw, a few of those jokes reminded me of my ex. Can't imagine why I don't miss him after all these years!
Hahaha!
http://www.sledxtreme.com/images/smiles/blebleble.gif (broken link) heh heh...c'mon now this ain't the Jay Leno show
............."the nuts are complimentary".....http://www.sledxtreme.com/images/smiles/super_happy.gif (broken link)
07-24-2007, 05:27 PM
Location: SW MO
1,640 posts, read
3,653,841 times
Reputation: 1081
Talk about yer male chauvinism!
There's a song written years ago and I swear they had my ex in mind when they wrote it. Sheldon Silverstein wrote the lyrics and music for it in 1974 and Tompall Glaser recorded it and it became a country music hit. It is called, "PUT ANOTHER LOG ON THE FIRE". I'm sure several of you know it. My sister and I still sing it at family gatherings which is about the only time we see each other.
It has been called "The Male Chauvinist National Anthem" and I just happen to have a link to a site where you can listen to it! Here it is:
Put Another Log On The Fire
Enjoy!
MrsG
07-24-2007, 05:29 PM
Location: Branson-Hollister-Kimberling City-Blue Eye-Ridgedale
1,814 posts, read
5,381,231 times
Reputation: 1589
Guy gets into his car...
A drunk phoned police to report that thieves had been in his car. "They've stolen the dashboard, the steering wheel, the brake pedal, the radio, and even the accelerator," he cried out.
However, before the police investigation could start, the phone rang a second time and the same voice came over the line. "Never mind," he said with a hiccup, "I got in the back seat by mistake."
07-24-2007, 05:45 PM
Location: Branson-Hollister-Kimberling City-Blue Eye-Ridgedale
1,814 posts, read
5,381,231 times
Reputation: 1589
More...
You'ns figurin to move to Missouri need to understand about the way Missourians feel about Arkansans...some folk say there's needs to be a passport.
The Arkansas state trooper pulls over a pickup truck on I-40. He says to the driver, "Got any ID?"
The driver says, "Bout what?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q: Did you hear about the $3,000,000 Arkansas State Lottery?
A: The winner gets $3 a year for a million years.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q: Why did O. J. Simpson want to move to Arkansas?
A: Everyone has the same DNA.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q: Did you hear that the governor's mansion in Little Rock, Arkansas burned down?
A: Yep. Pert' near took out the whole trailer park.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A new law recently passed in Arkansas:
When a couple gets divorced, they're still brother and sister.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q: What's the best thing to ever come out of Arkansas?
A: I-40.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two Arkansasians are walking down different ends of a street toward each other, and one is carrying a sack. When they meet, one says, "Hey Tommy Ray, what'cha got in th' bag?"
"Jus' some chickens."
"If I guesses how many they are, can I have one?"
"Shoot, ya guesses right and I'll give you both of them."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q: What do a divorce in Arkansas, a tornado in Kansas, and a hurricane in Florida have in common?
A: Somebody's fixin' to lose them a trailer.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Arkansasian came home and found his house on fire, rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here. My house is on fire!"
"OK," replied the fireman, "how do we get there?"
"Say, don't you still have those big red trucks?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q: Why do folks in Arkansas go to the movie theater in groups of 18 or more?
A: 'Cuz 17 and under not admitted.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Q: What do you get when you have 32 Arkansasians in the same room?
A: A full set of teeth.
I gotta right to tell these...my momma is from there.
07-24-2007, 06:03 PM
Location: Moved to town. Miss 'my' woods and critters.
25,464 posts, read
13,571,982 times
Reputation: 31765
Laughs
Quote:
Originally Posted by
mrsgenealogy
Ohhhh! These are some real "groaners", you guys!
I must admit to LOLISOM a few times, though!!!
Hahaha!
Get it? LOLISOM? I won't explain it unless no one gets it. I just made it up but I bet several of you will "get it" because of the context in which it was said.
Hint! Hint!
Btw, a few of those jokes reminded me of my ex. Can't imagine why I don't miss him after all these years!
Hahaha!
Or: Laughing out loud in spite of myself ????
07-24-2007, 06:09 PM
Location: SW MO
1,640 posts, read
3,653,841 times
Reputation: 1081
Funneee stuff, L J!
Oh, I'm LOL at those, L J! Even if I DID hear some o' them before. Like Larry the Cable Guy would say, "I don't care who you are...that's funny, right there!"
True confessions...I gave birth to two children in AR...
...but I've asked God and them for forgiveness so I think it's okay. I'm pretty sure God has forgiven me but the kids are still mad about it!
07-24-2007, 06:14 PM
Location: SW MO
1,640 posts, read
3,653,841 times
Reputation: 1081
Ding! Ding! Ding!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Northwoods Voyager
Or: Laughing out loud in spite of myself ????
DING! DING! DING!
We haaaave a winner!!!
Northwoods Voyager solved the acronym riddle!
Hahaha! That's exactly right! LOLISOM! I've never seen that used before...have you? It just happened to fit perfectly so I used it. Thanks for playin' along with me!
07-24-2007, 06:32 PM
Location: Moved to town. Miss 'my' woods and critters.
25,464 posts, read
13,571,982 times
Reputation: 31765
rep
Quote:
Originally Posted by
mrsgenealogy
DING! DING! DING!
We haaaave a winner!!!
Northwoods Voyager solved the acronym riddle!
Hahaha! That's exactly right! LOLISOM! I've never seen that used before...have you? It just happened to fit perfectly so I used it. Thanks for playin' along with me!
Sorry
Ah tried mah durndest ta give youens a rep point, but them dang messsges keep atellin me ahs gots to give sum ta tha others that be out thar.
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Travel time to work - 60 to 89 minutes (%)
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School Enrollment - Not enrolled in school (%)
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School enrollment - Not enrolled (%)
Median number of rooms in houses and condos
Median number of rooms in apartments
Housing units lacking complete plumbing facilities (%)
Housing units lacking complete kitchen facilities (%)
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Urban houses (%)
Rural houses (%)
Households with people 60 years and over (%)
Households with people 65 years and over (%)
Households with people 75 years and over (%)
Households with one or more nonrelatives (%)
Households with no nonrelatives (%)
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Nonfamily households (%)
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Mean number of bedrooms in renter occupied houses
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Mean number of vehichles in owner occupied houses
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Mean number of vehichles in renter occupied houses
Mortgage status - with mortgage (%)
Mortgage status - with second mortgage (%)
Mortgage status - with home equity loan (%)
Mortgage status - with both second mortgage and home equity loan (%)
Mortgage status - without a mortgage (%)
Average family size
Average family size - White
Average family size - Black or African American
Average family size - Asian
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Average family size - American Indian and Alaska Native
Average family size - Multirace
Average family size - Other Race
Geographical mobility - Same house 1 year ago (%)
Geographical mobility - Moved within same county (%)
Geographical mobility - Moved from different county within same state (%)
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Geographical mobility - Moved from abroad (%)
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Place of birth - Native, outside of US (%)
Place of birth - Foreign born (%)
Housing units in structures - 1, detached (%)
Housing units in structures - 1, attached (%)
Housing units in structures - 2 (%)
Housing units in structures - 3 or 4 (%)
Housing units in structures - 5 to 9 (%)
Housing units in structures - 10 to 19 (%)
Housing units in structures - 20 to 49 (%)
Housing units in structures - 50 or more (%)
Housing units in structures - Mobile home (%)
Housing units in structures - Boat, RV, van, etc. (%)
House/condo owner moved in on average (years ago)
Renter moved in on average (years ago)
Year householder moved into unit - Moved in 1999 to March 2000 (%)
Year householder moved into unit - Moved in 1995 to 1998 (%)
Year householder moved into unit - Moved in 1990 to 1994 (%)
Year householder moved into unit - Moved in 1980 to 1989 (%)
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Year householder moved into unit - Moved in 1969 or earlier (%)
Means of transportation to work - Drove car alone (%)
Means of transportation to work - Carpooled (%)
Means of transportation to work - Public transportation (%)
Means of transportation to work - Bus or trolley bus (%)
Means of transportation to work - Streetcar or trolley car (%)
Means of transportation to work - Subway or elevated (%)
Means of transportation to work - Railroad (%)
Means of transportation to work - Ferryboat (%)
Means of transportation to work - Taxicab (%)
Means of transportation to work - Motorcycle (%)
Means of transportation to work - Bicycle (%)
Means of transportation to work - Walked (%)
Means of transportation to work - Other means (%)
Working at home (%)
Industry diversity
Most Common Industries - Agriculture, forestry, fishing and hunting, and mining (%)
Most Common Industries - Agriculture, forestry, fishing and hunting (%)
Most Common Industries - Mining, quarrying, and oil and gas extraction (%)
Most Common Industries - Construction (%)
Most Common Industries - Manufacturing (%)
Most Common Industries - Wholesale trade (%)
Most Common Industries - Retail trade (%)
Most Common Industries - Transportation and warehousing, and utilities (%)
Most Common Industries - Transportation and warehousing (%)
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Most Common Industries - Finance and insurance (%)
Most Common Industries - Real estate and rental and leasing (%)
Most Common Industries - Professional, scientific, and management, and administrative and waste management services (%)
Most Common Industries - Professional, scientific, and technical services (%)
Most Common Industries - Management of companies and enterprises (%)
Most Common Industries - Administrative and support and waste management services (%)
Most Common Industries - Educational services, and health care and social assistance (%)
Most Common Industries - Educational services (%)
Most Common Industries - Health care and social assistance (%)
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Most Common Industries - Arts, entertainment, and recreation (%)
Most Common Industries - Accommodation and food services (%)
Most Common Industries - Other services, except public administration (%)
Most Common Industries - Public administration (%)
Occupation diversity
Most Common Occupations - Management, business, science, and arts occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Management, business, and financial occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Management occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Business and financial operations occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Computer, engineering, and science occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Computer and mathematical occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Architecture and engineering occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Life, physical, and social science occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Education, legal, community service, arts, and media occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Community and social service occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Legal occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Education, training, and library occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Arts, design, entertainment, sports, and media occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Healthcare practitioners and technical occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Health diagnosing and treating practitioners and other technical occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Health technologists and technicians (%)
Most Common Occupations - Service occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Healthcare support occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Protective service occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Fire fighting and prevention, and other protective service workers including supervisors (%)
Most Common Occupations - Law enforcement workers including supervisors (%)
Most Common Occupations - Food preparation and serving related occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Building and grounds cleaning and maintenance occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Personal care and service occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Sales and office occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Sales and related occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Office and administrative support occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Natural resources, construction, and maintenance occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Farming, fishing, and forestry occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Construction and extraction occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Installation, maintenance, and repair occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Production, transportation, and material moving occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Production occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Transportation occupations (%)
Most Common Occupations - Material moving occupations (%)
People in Group quarters - Institutionalized population (%)
People in Group quarters - Correctional institutions (%)
People in Group quarters - Federal prisons and detention centers (%)
People in Group quarters - Halfway houses (%)
People in Group quarters - Local jails and other confinement facilities (including police lockups) (%)
People in Group quarters - Military disciplinary barracks (%)
People in Group quarters - State prisons (%)
People in Group quarters - Other types of correctional institutions (%)
People in Group quarters - Nursing homes (%)
People in Group quarters - Hospitals/wards, hospices, and schools for the handicapped (%)
People in Group quarters - Hospitals/wards and hospices for chronically ill (%)
People in Group quarters - Hospices or homes for chronically ill (%)
People in Group quarters - Military hospitals or wards for chronically ill (%)
People in Group quarters - Other hospitals or wards for chronically ill (%)
People in Group quarters - Hospitals or wards for drug/alcohol abuse (%)
People in Group quarters - Mental (Psychiatric) hospitals or wards (%)
People in Group quarters - Schools, hospitals, or wards for the mentally retarded (%)
People in Group quarters - Schools, hospitals, or wards for the physically handicapped (%)
People in Group quarters - Institutions for the deaf (%)
People in Group quarters - Institutions for the blind (%)
People in Group quarters - Orthopedic wards and institutions for the physically handicapped (%)
People in Group quarters - Wards in general hospitals for patients who have no usual home elsewhere (%)
People in Group quarters - Wards in military hospitals for patients who have no usual home elsewhere (%)
People in Group quarters - Juvenile institutions (%)
People in Group quarters - Long-term care (%)
People in Group quarters - Homes for abused, dependent, and neglected children (%)
People in Group quarters - Residential treatment centers for emotionally disturbed children (%)
People in Group quarters - Training schools for juvenile delinquents (%)
People in Group quarters - Short-term care, detention or diagnostic centers for delinquent children (%)
People in Group quarters - Type of juvenile institution unknown (%)
People in Group quarters - Noninstitutionalized population (%)
People in Group quarters - College dormitories (includes college quarters off campus) (%)
People in Group quarters - Military quarters (%)
People in Group quarters - On base (%)
People in Group quarters - Barracks, unaccompanied personnel housing (UPH), (Enlisted/Officer), ;and similar group living quarters for military personnel (%)
People in Group quarters - Transient quarters for temporary residents (%)
People in Group quarters - Military ships (%)
People in Group quarters - Group homes (%)
People in Group quarters - Homes or halfway houses for drug/alcohol abuse (%)
People in Group quarters - Homes for the mentally ill (%)
People in Group quarters - Homes for the mentally retarded (%)
People in Group quarters - Homes for the physically handicapped (%)
People in Group quarters - Other group homes (%)
People in Group quarters - Religious group quarters (%)
People in Group quarters - Dormitories (%)
People in Group quarters - Agriculture workers' dormitories on farms (%)
People in Group quarters - Job Corps and vocational training facilities (%)
People in Group quarters - Other workers' dormitories (%)
People in Group quarters - Crews of maritime vessels (%)
People in Group quarters - Other nonhousehold living situations (%)
People in Group quarters - Other noninstitutional group quarters (%)
Residents speaking English at home (%)
Residents speaking English at home - Born in the United States (%)
Residents speaking English at home - Native, born elsewhere (%)
Residents speaking English at home - Foreign born (%)
Residents speaking Spanish at home (%)
Residents speaking Spanish at home - Born in the United States (%)
Residents speaking Spanish at home - Native, born elsewhere (%)
Residents speaking Spanish at home - Foreign born (%)
Residents speaking other language at home (%)
Residents speaking other language at home - Born in the United States (%)
Residents speaking other language at home - Native, born elsewhere (%)
Residents speaking other language at home - Foreign born (%)
Class of Workers - Employee of private company (%)
Class of Workers - Self-employed in own incorporated business (%)
Class of Workers - Private not-for-profit wage and salary workers (%)
Class of Workers - Local government workers (%)
Class of Workers - State government workers (%)
Class of Workers - Federal government workers (%)
Class of Workers - Self-employed workers in own not incorporated business and Unpaid family workers (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Utility gas (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Bottled, tank, or LP gas (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Electricity (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Fuel oil, kerosene, etc. (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Coal or coke (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Wood (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Solar energy (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - Other fuel (%)
House heating fuel used in houses and condos - No fuel used (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Utility gas (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Bottled, tank, or LP gas (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Electricity (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Fuel oil, kerosene, etc. (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Coal or coke (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Wood (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Solar energy (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - Other fuel (%)
House heating fuel used in apartments - No fuel used (%)
Armed forces status - In Armed Forces (%)
Armed forces status - Civilian (%)
Armed forces status - Civilian - Veteran (%)
Armed forces status - Civilian - Nonveteran (%)
Fatal accidents locations in years 2005-2021
Fatal accidents locations in 2005
Fatal accidents locations in 2006
Fatal accidents locations in 2007
Fatal accidents locations in 2008
Fatal accidents locations in 2009
Fatal accidents locations in 2010
Fatal accidents locations in 2011
Fatal accidents locations in 2012
Fatal accidents locations in 2013
Fatal accidents locations in 2014
Fatal accidents locations in 2015
Fatal accidents locations in 2016
Fatal accidents locations in 2017
Fatal accidents locations in 2018
Fatal accidents locations in 2019
Fatal accidents locations in 2020
Fatal accidents locations in 2021
Alcohol use - People drinking some alcohol every month (%)
Alcohol use - People not drinking at all (%)
Alcohol use - Average days/month drinking alcohol
Alcohol use - Average drinks/week
Alcohol use - Average days/year people drink much
Audiometry - Average condition of hearing (%)
Audiometry - People that can hear a whisper from across a quiet room (%)
Audiometry - People that can hear normal voice from across a quiet room (%)
Audiometry - Ears ringing, roaring, buzzing (%)
Audiometry - Had a job exposure to loud noise (%)
Audiometry - Had off-work exposure to loud noise (%)
Blood Pressure & Cholesterol - Has high blood pressure (%)
Blood Pressure & Cholesterol - Checking blood pressure at home (%)
Blood Pressure & Cholesterol - Frequently checking blood cholesterol (%)
Blood Pressure & Cholesterol - Has high cholesterol level (%)
Consumer Behavior - Money monthly spent on food at supermarket/grocery store
Consumer Behavior - Money monthly spent on food at other stores
Consumer Behavior - Money monthly spent on eating out
Consumer Behavior - Money monthly spent on carryout/delivered foods
Consumer Behavior - Income spent on food at supermarket/grocery store (%)
Consumer Behavior - Income spent on food at other stores (%)
Consumer Behavior - Income spent on eating out (%)
Consumer Behavior - Income spent on carryout/delivered foods (%)
Current Health Status - General health condition (%)
Current Health Status - Blood donors (%)
Current Health Status - Has blood ever tested for HIV virus (%)
Current Health Status - Left-handed people (%)
Dermatology - People using sunscreen (%)
Diabetes - Diabetics (%)
Diabetes - Had a blood test for high blood sugar (%)
Diabetes - People taking insulin (%)
Diet Behavior & Nutrition - Diet health (%)
Diet Behavior & Nutrition - Milk product consumption (# of products/month)
Diet Behavior & Nutrition - Meals not home prepared (#/week)
Diet Behavior & Nutrition - Meals from fast food or pizza place (#/week)
Diet Behavior & Nutrition - Ready-to-eat foods (#/month)
Diet Behavior & Nutrition - Frozen meals/pizza (#/month)
Drug Use - People that ever used marijuana or hashish (%)
Drug Use - Ever used hard drugs (%)
Drug Use - Ever used any form of cocaine (%)
Drug Use - Ever used heroin (%)
Drug Use - Ever used methamphetamine (%)
Health Insurance - People covered by health insurance (%)
Kidney Conditions-Urology - Avg. # of times urinating at night
Medical Conditions - People with asthma (%)
Medical Conditions - People with anemia (%)
Medical Conditions - People with psoriasis (%)
Medical Conditions - People with overweight (%)
Medical Conditions - Elderly people having difficulties in thinking or remembering (%)
Medical Conditions - People who ever received blood transfusion (%)
Medical Conditions - People having trouble seeing even with glass/contacts (%)
Medical Conditions - People with arthritis (%)
Medical Conditions - People with gout (%)
Medical Conditions - People with congestive heart failure (%)
Medical Conditions - People with coronary heart disease (%)
Medical Conditions - People with angina pectoris (%)
Medical Conditions - People who ever had heart attack (%)
Medical Conditions - People who ever had stroke (%)
Medical Conditions - People with emphysema (%)
Medical Conditions - People with thyroid problem (%)
Medical Conditions - People with chronic bronchitis (%)
Medical Conditions - People with any liver condition (%)
Medical Conditions - People who ever had cancer or malignancy (%)
Mental Health - People who have little interest in doing things (%)
Mental Health - People feeling down, depressed, or hopeless (%)
Mental Health - People who have trouble sleeping or sleeping too much (%)
Mental Health - People feeling tired or having little energy (%)
Mental Health - People with poor appetite or overeating (%)
Mental Health - People feeling bad about themself (%)
Mental Health - People who have trouble concentrating on things (%)
Mental Health - People moving or speaking slowly or too fast (%)
Mental Health - People having thoughts they would be better off dead (%)
Oral Health - Average years since last visit a dentist
Oral Health - People embarrassed because of mouth (%)
Oral Health - People with gum disease (%)
Oral Health - General health of teeth and gums (%)
Oral Health - Average days a week using dental floss/device
Oral Health - Average days a week using mouthwash for dental problem
Oral Health - Average number of teeth
Pesticide Use - Households using pesticides to control insects (%)
Pesticide Use - Households using pesticides to kill weeds (%)
Physical Activity - People doing vigorous-intensity work activities (%)
Physical Activity - People doing moderate-intensity work activities (%)
Physical Activity - People walking or bicycling (%)
Physical Activity - People doing vigorous-intensity recreational activities (%)
Physical Activity - People doing moderate-intensity recreational activities (%)
Physical Activity - Average hours a day doing sedentary activities
Physical Activity - Average hours a day watching TV or videos
Physical Activity - Average hours a day using computer
Physical Functioning - People having limitations keeping them from working (%)
Physical Functioning - People limited in amount of work they can do (%)
Physical Functioning - People that need special equipment to walk (%)
Physical Functioning - People experiencing confusion/memory problems (%)
Physical Functioning - People requiring special healthcare equipment (%)
Prescription Medications - Average number of prescription medicines taking
Preventive Aspirin Use - Adults 40+ taking low-dose aspirin (%)
Reproductive Health - Vaginal deliveries (%)
Reproductive Health - Cesarean deliveries (%)
Reproductive Health - Deliveries resulted in a live birth (%)
Reproductive Health - Pregnancies resulted in a delivery (%)
Reproductive Health - Women breastfeeding newborns (%)
Reproductive Health - Women that had a hysterectomy (%)
Reproductive Health - Women that had both ovaries removed (%)
Reproductive Health - Women that have ever taken birth control pills (%)
Reproductive Health - Women taking birth control pills (%)
Reproductive Health - Women that have ever used Depo-Provera or injectables (%)
Reproductive Health - Women that have ever used female hormones (%)
Sexual Behavior - People 18+ that ever had sex (vaginal, anal, or oral) (%)
Sexual Behavior - Males 18+ that ever had vaginal sex with a woman (%)
Sexual Behavior - Males 18+ that ever performed oral sex on a woman (%)
Sexual Behavior - Males 18+ that ever had anal sex with a woman (%)
Sexual Behavior - Males 18+ that ever had any sex with a man (%)
Sexual Behavior - Females 18+ that ever had vaginal sex with a man (%)
Sexual Behavior - Females 18+ that ever performed oral sex on a man (%)
Sexual Behavior - Females 18+ that ever had anal sex with a man (%)
Sexual Behavior - Females 18+ that ever had any kind of sex with a woman (%)
Sexual Behavior - Average age people first had sex
Sexual Behavior - Average number of female sex partners in lifetime (males 18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of female vaginal sex partners in lifetime (males 18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average age people first performed oral sex on a woman (18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of woman performed oral sex on in lifetime (18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of male sex partners in lifetime (males 18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of male anal sex partners in lifetime (males 18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average age people first performed oral sex on a man (18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of male oral sex partners in lifetime (18+)
Sexual Behavior - People using protection when performing oral sex (%)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of times people have vaginal or anal sex a year
Sexual Behavior - People having sex without condom (%)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of male sex partners in lifetime (females 18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of male vaginal sex partners in lifetime (females 18+)
Sexual Behavior - Average number of female sex partners in lifetime (females 18+)
Sexual Behavior - Circumcised males 18+ (%)
Sleep Disorders - Average hours sleeping at night
Sleep Disorders - People that has trouble sleeping (%)
Smoking-Cigarette Use - People smoking cigarettes (%)
Taste & Smell - People 40+ having problems with smell (%)
Taste & Smell - People 40+ having problems with taste (%)
Taste & Smell - People 40+ that ever had wisdom teeth removed (%)
Taste & Smell - People 40+ that ever had tonsils teeth removed (%)
Taste & Smell - People 40+ that ever had a loss of consciousness because of a head injury (%)
Taste & Smell - People 40+ that ever had a broken nose or other serious injury to face or skull (%)
Taste & Smell - People 40+ that ever had two or more sinus infections (%)
Weight - Average height (inches)
Weight - Average weight (pounds)
Weight - Average BMI
Weight - People that are obese (%)
Weight - People that ever were obese (%)
Weight - People trying to lose weight (%)
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Who me??????
Hahaha! 
Talk about yer male chauvinism!
Funneee stuff, L J!
Ah tried mah durndest ta give youens a rep point, but them dang messsges keep atellin me ahs gots to give sum ta tha others that be out thar. 
