Potential move to Monterey Area - CSUMB - faculty offer (Los Angeles: real estate, apartments)

[BewicksWren]

Hi,

I have been offered a faculty position at CSUMB. I am thrilled with the opportunity. I am from the Bay Area, and Monterey has always been a place I would go with my family when I was young. During my interview, I spent most of my time on campus and was surprised how isolated it is. It had a very bizarre feel. But the people were fantastic and overall I think it would be a nice place to work. I have also been offered another faculty position in the Los Angeles area. That may sound horrendous for a Northern Californian, but it is essentially in Pasadena and that is a nice area and can also provide the lifestyle I am looking for at this stage of life. Both positions are roughly equal from a professional point of view.

My dilemma: I am in my mid-30s, male and single. My main personal goal for my next move is to buy a house, meet someone, start a family, and really settle in with the community. During my interview at CSUMB, I was shown houses within Ft. Ord where faculty live and that is absolutely a no-fly zone for me. I need to be in a community with amenities and people (outside my work) nearby. I did not get a good vibe for Marina or Seaside either, and thus Monterey seemed like the best option. I am an outdoorsy person (trail running, surfing, etc), and I know all the reasons why Monterey is amazing for that type of lifestyle. But, I am far more worried about meeting a group of friends and dating. I have friends in Santa Cruz and the Bay Area, but I am curious about the immediate Monterey area and the potential for building a community there. During my recent visits, I could not help but notice the lack of young adults out and about in town. It was discouraging. Maybe I am being overly critical, but it is a major red flag for me. Oh, and that whole cost-of living thing. That may be a problem for finding a house in Monterey also

Any advice/thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

[MtnSurfer]

Hi BewicksWren,

It's always nice to have options. I'm very familiar with both locations as I'm from LA county originally. These are really two different worlds in many ways. So I won't go into an in depth comparison as I'm sure you are aware of many of the differences. I also came here married so I won't attempt to comment on the dating scene. I do work close to CSUMB with quite a few single adults. There also seem to a lot of singles hanging out in downtown Monterey. But even so the population is much smalller than the Bay area or LA county/Pasadena region. So your 'immediate' pool of singles is obviously smaller. It would take more creativity, IMO, to find someone.

With regards to the cost of living Pasadena is also pricey with gentrification playing a large role not to mention the high demand for real estate. Buying a home in the nicer parts of Monterey or Pasadena is no small investment and should be carefully considered in both places. That is why I always recommend renting first before buying. You will get a much better lay of the land while living in a place vs. from afar. In the Los Angeles for example you can cross over one street and be in a more seedy neighborhood even within seemingly nice areas. It's a buyer beware market for sure. The city of Monterey itself is nice for the most part. I don't really care for the border area near Fremont, Casa Verde and Hwy 1. It also has many apartments there. Your biggest issue really will cost of real estate in the nicer parts of either location.

In summary you have two good options and a tough decision. I like Monterey much more than anywhere in SoCal. But with your criteria including the dating scene it will take more time in evaluating both options. Are you opposed to driving into Santa Cruz or the Bay Area to meetup with other singles as well? I know some of the singles I work with like to go into San Jose or SF at times for the weekend or other activities. I take my family to Santa Cruz, San Jose and SF for day trips as well. Just something to think about since Monterey isn't 'that' far from the larger cities. For me its actually removed just enough to provide a higher quality of life without the crowds and daily traffic of the Bay Area or LA region, yet close enough to go there when we want to.

Derek

[Ruth4Truth]

People in Santa Cruz date in Monterrey, and visa versa. The communities on Monterrey Bay are all neighbors, all on one continuum. You shouldn't have any trouble, as long as you don't confine yourself to your immediate neighborhood. Explore farther afield, Santa Cruz, etc. aren't that far away. And there are events there you'll want to attend, anyway.

I really don't understand this requirement some people have that dating be restricted to their little community. Your dream person might be just a half-hr. drive away, or less.

[MtnSurfer]

Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth

People in Santa Cruz date in Monterrey, and visa versa. The communities on Monterrey Bay are all neighbors, all on one continuum. You shouldn't have any trouble, as long as you don't confine yourself to your immediate neighborhood. Explore farther afield, Santa Cruz, etc. aren't that far away. And there are events there you'll want to attend, anyway.

I really don't understand this requirement some people have that dating be restricted to their little community. Your dream person might be just a half-hr. drive away, or less.

I totally agree with this philosophy/approach. Living in a sea of millions doesn't at all mean you'll find the right one next door. Many people date out of their area, state and even country for similar reasons. Why 'limit' yourself like this except for the obvious reason of convenience? Dating from afar has benefits and keeps life interesting. In fact even while living in LA County with millions of single women I dated my future wife while she lived in SD. It was a 2+ hour one way to see her. But so what! It's worth the drive to be with the right person.

Even if living in Pasadena you may end up dating from afar. There are no guarantees the right lady for you lives next door. She could actually live in a different city, state or even country. If she is the right one (longer term) does it really matter? Think about it.

Derek

[Clark9272]

Being in your 30's and single, you need to consider both your career path AND your romantic possibilities ( I assume that you are Hetero).

SoCAL will offer you more teaching opportunities and networking among other college faculty than a stint at CSUMB will provide. Romantically, the Monterey Bay is heavily skewed towards older folks. The dating environment is extremely limited. Pasadena (and surrounding areas) is the polar opposite.

If you were an older academician with a family, putting down roots in Monterey and seeking tenure at CSUMB would be a no-brainer. For a young, single man like yourself -- stay away!

[phantompilot]

What position did you wind up taking?

I think with the trail running and all that kind of stuff Monterey would be an awesome base for you.
There is a guy on here who has posted photos from his trail running blog (he's actually an elite athlete with world records) of the places in the Ventana wilderness - you would be thrilled with it.

In any case, it does sound like a tough decision since if the other position were at either HM or CT then those are both more prestigious schools than CSUMB, yet on the other hand CSUMB might offer more opportunities to stand out and advance your career.

[the city]

This should be a no brainer - Monterey.

Pasadena has an urban core, but it's still adjacent to the San Fernando Valley and it's mostly suburban. Alot of families in Pasadena.

Monterey, and imo most urban coastal communities, are hot spots for young professionals. You should look close to downtown Monterey and Marina.There are some young professionals living in Salinas.

Try using sites like meetup.com to find gatherings in your area. Look into match.com I have used match before and it was very useful in getting dates, but unfortunately I did not find any Christian women so I met my girlfriend through church.

But the traffic and heat in Pasadena would drive me mad.

Also, if you are from NorCal, you are probably more likely to like some one who is similar to you. The girls in LA ARE WAY DIFFERENT. I moved from an area like Monterey to LA and I never found one women who wasn't into partying and judging men by defining success as how how much you have and how much your parents have.

[Ruth4Truth]

Originally Posted by the city

This should be a no brainer - Monterey.

This. Also, once he's settled in to Monterey, he can start applying for jobs at UCSC, for a career step up, and a community/area with more singles (Capitola, Scotts Valley, etc., for more options).