Tell me all about Southern Hospitality (Memphis, Murfreesboro: homes, employment, YMCA)

[tennesseegirl95]

Southern Hospitality is a thing your born with I reckon...I was born in North Florida. Raised in Connecticut. But is now living in Middle TN and I never got why people in the tri-state are were so rude and cold. Once back living down South, I realized the Northeasterners weren't exactly rude. They weren't just welcoming. They kept to themselves. So, nothing against them. But Southern Hospitality beats all.

[El Passeaux]

Originally Posted by tennesseegirl95

Southern Hospitality is a thing your born with I reckon...I was born in North Florida. Raised in Connecticut. But is now living in Middle TN and I never got why people in the tri-state are were so rude and cold. Once back living down South, I realized the Northeasterners weren't exactly rude. They weren't just welcoming. They kept to themselves. So, nothing against them. But Southern Hospitality beats all.

I agree, i was raised in the Boston suburbs. It was a culture shock at first with things like new neighbors introducing themselves (first time ever). I actually opened the door with the chain lock on asking what they wanted until they just welcomed me to the neighborhood with a cake, their phone number and if I needed any info on the area, even a babysitter. I agree about the northeast, its upfront but also reserved. Once you become a friend, you have a true friend, its just getting there.

[Mary_Moon]

Originally Posted by dispointd in lex

Southern hospitality must be a myth there are a few people who were raised right and still practice the ways in which they were raised. I have not experienced it often and when i do i thank the man above, it must be a genrational thing, younger people are not practicing or BEING TAUGHT southern hospitality and i DO NOT believe it is because the south has become a "melting pot" ( i know a jab at "yankees" when i hear it!) I am a yankee who's moved to the beautiful south ( i have read on another post you cannot EVER become a southerner, just 'cause you moved here, unless you are born here and your family roots going back many years)who was raised correctly, am curteous, and helpful and will always flash a smile your way, the minute i open my mouth and my accent comes out, people 'round here tend to lose there smile if they had one on their face at all.Oh and my husband has had 2 people that were definately from here (the south) cut in front of him in a line. What's with people driving or walking all over property here? I did not step one foot on anyones land unless i rang the doorbell and asked them if i could retrieve a lost baseball or frisbee that had landed in their yard. Bad manners and rudeness are everywhere.

Wait a minute, you have 6 posts in 4 different forums and 5 of those posts are specific gripes about the lack of "Southern Hospitality" you've encountered in North Carolina where you live. Judging by your example here, maybe the common denominator is your actions, not your accent. Southern hospitality does not equal us eating $*!@ with a grin and a thank you.

[urbanlemur]

I have lived in Washington state, California, Utah and now reside in New York (Bronx). My wife and I have visited the Nashville area twice in the last two years and have never experienced the kind of openess, friendliness and kindness to visitors that TN people show anywhere else. I am certain that this kind of hospitality extends to other southern states but it was wonderful to be a part of. My wife and I wish to move to TN some day and would do it yesterday but we're trying to sell our home and it's difficult at best right now. I just want to say thanks to you all out there for showing us your warmth and kindness during our stay the last two years...we look forward to being a part of it again ASAP!!!

[tennesseegirl95]

Originally Posted by El Passeaux

I agree, i was raised in the Boston suburbs. It was a culture shock at first with things like new neighbors introducing themselves (first time ever). I actually opened the door with the chain lock on asking what they wanted until they just welcomed me to the neighborhood with a cake, their phone number and if I needed any info on the area, even a babysitter. I agree about the northeast, its upfront but also reserved. Once you become a friend, you have a true friend, its just getting there.

I know how that feels. When we first moved in, our closest neighbor was 1/2 a mile down the road. He came over, wanted to help out and offer advice and we thought he was overbearing. But after living down here for awhile, I realized that he wasn't overbearing. I just wasn't used to the helpful nature down here!

[rossc]

I offered to help my backyard neighbor with his pool deck and I though he was going to call the cops. They are from NJ. He's warmed up a bit since then. Turns out they are a gay couple and had issues with that in NJ, so when they first moved here they were guarded expecting the same thing.

[IngleDave]

I'm glad this thread has revived. It's given me the opportunity to evaluate my situation even more, and how content I am with it. Biographically, I'm a 57-year-old man, Nashville public school educated, degree from MTSU and professionally employed at the same place for nearly 17 years. I own my house; landscaping is my hobby and after many years of being out and about I'm content to stay close to home and bask in my good fortune relatively pressure free.

My point is that here in north Inglewood, my neighborhood is all mixed up. I was raised on this very street, coming back after 30 years on the hip, trendy west side of town. In the dozen years I've been in this house, I have the pleasure of neighbors from Memphis, North Carolina, Texas, Illinois, Indiana, Oregon, Louisiana, Iowa, New York and Georgia. Those are what I consider my immediate neighbors. Interspersed among them are my mom down the street, a elderly couples I've known since I was very young. I remember their pregnancies with their now 50+ year old children. I don't know if what we all have is called hospitality or not. I was voted friendliest of my senior class so this nature of mine is a lifelong affliction. I find as I get older that some of that can be mixed with a hefty dose of grumpy old man, but it works for me.

There's not a soul in my vicinity that I don't know by name. I know their kids' names, their dogs names, their professions, political views and more importantly just who they are in general and they know me. I don't think I've totally freaked anyone out by approaching them as they walk in front of my house to introduce myself. How else would I know the bloodhounds from 3 streets over are named Sherlock and Daisy. Every one participates in the neighborhood community, but not in a sense like Providence in MJ or something like that. Being an inner ring suburb gives a unique perspective of things. Sure, we have creeps, we have people who's socio-economic circumstances and cultures are different from mine. That's usually fine until my buttons are pushed, but that's for another day. Basically, what we have here is the epitome of hospitality in the south. Southern Hospitality is a goofy phrase to me, like something Tennessee Ernie Ford would mention on I Love Lucy. We're much more real and committed to this community than pouring gravy on a biscuit. We feed each other's animals, pick up the mail, drop off cars at shops, airport runs, ER runs, take newspapers to the doors of the old folks, take in their trash cans, mow 5 runs of grass in their yards to "remind" them that the yard needs attention, stand in the street in groups, answer the door to find a red-headed 7-year-old in a princess costume holding a plate of what "mama just made for dinner with herbs WE grew" sharing my tomatoes, hauling away brush when the chipper is late, trimming shrubs when they're too chicken to do it. It goes on and on and on. I love being here. I love being part of this odd collection of people and representaive cross-section of this country.

Hospitality is not something easily defined. It's a way of life. If you give one second of your time even thinking it's odd, maybe you've picked the wrong place, because, with a bit of effort, and openess, the hospitable nature of all the people from everywhere will come out. The biggest thing to remember is that it's up to you, not us. Don't expect us to swoon all over you, we won't. But we will sincerely want to get to know you and welcome you as one of us. Think like you're not one of us, and one of the community and you're pretty much a lost cause. I was thinking about that when hunting down a cat the other night, walking through neighbors yards, looking in their sheds, propping up a tomato plant for them in my travels. It would never in a million years occur to me that i had to ask permission to move about at will. I would never expect it from them either.

I don't know if I've made a point here or not, but the bottom line is. If you treat the folks around you as aliens with strange customs, you probably will always be one. I guess that's fine, but it sure is more fun to blend. And who knows, maybe that 7-year-old will actually bring YOU a cupcake sometime. In the meantime, I'll enjoy mine.

David

[PaulaC]

I was truly hoping to find some hospitality after living in FL for so many years, and in some ways it is true. When you meet people one-on-one, they are very, very friendly. However, I commute each day from Columbia to Nashville. I have found (after 2 years) that people are just as nasty on the roads as they are anywhere else. I am amazed at the lack of turn signals when changing lanes. Just cut right in front of me, no problem. I have learned that I need to simply hang back and let them race. Downtown Nashville is very dirty and the things I see in the parking garage at Centennial Medical Center I wouldn't even be allowed to post here. All in all, it depends on what you are looking for. Perhaps coming from Los Angeles, Nashville would be great. I'm just not very impressed.

[seain dublin]

Originally Posted by CantWait2Leave

I live in LA with my husband and we are planning on visiting Nashville soon. We cannot stand the rude people, road rage, liberal views, etc... We are Christians who want to be around like minded people. People always say the south is so friendly because of the southern hospitality. What does that mean? Examples? I've never been to the South.

I thought the idea of being a "Christian" was to care for others regardless of whether or not you saw eye to eye with them on your beliefs.

I guess your only "Christian" to those who share your views.

[seain dublin]

Originally Posted by PaulaC

I was truly hoping to find some hospitality after living in FL for so many years, and in some ways it is true. When you meet people one-on-one, they are very, very friendly. However, I commute each day from Columbia to Nashville. I have found (after 2 years) that people are just as nasty on the roads as they are anywhere else. I am amazed at the lack of turn signals when changing lanes. Just cut right in front of me, no problem. I have learned that I need to simply hang back and let them race. Downtown Nashville is very dirty and the things I see in the parking garage at Centennial Medical Center I wouldn't even be allowed to post here. All in all, it depends on what you are looking for. Perhaps coming from Los Angeles, Nashville would be great. I'm just not very impressed.

You have lived in FL many years and are amazed at the lack of turn signals in TN???? LOL....I don't think anyone in Florida knows what a turn signal is.